Hi

I’m scared and I’m wishing you were here right now. I’m scared because I know I’m not the only one who wants you. I know that boy across the class looks at you and wonders what your lips feel like on a Saturday night in the middle of the summer after an hour of heavy drinking and flirting from across the room. I’m scared because I know I’m not good enough for you. I know that when your friends see me they wonder how you ended up with this. This unequal portrait of insanity and sadness and flaws uncountable that I call myself. I’m scared because I always thought I would try to write about our relationship and I would be unable to because I can’t express you in any language, but only in the movement of our bodies as they intertwine together and the change in my heartbeat when I even think about you and I. I’m scared because I know that sometimes you think about what you would be like if I had never been there. If we never would have crossed paths and you would have continued. And I know you think about all the lips you could have touched and all the hearts you could have broken. I’m scared because I used to want you to find me in the stars or a book or even the smell of your sheets. And now I’m lucky if you even find me in the pit of your heart. And I am scared.

Black is always elegant. It is the most complete colour in the whole world, made of all the colours in the palette.