aesthetic shitposts

god is ignoring my safe word

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression

i got your mother so wet now shes got trench pussy

The only things I’m memorializing today are a couple beers

Buy her a bottom surgery and then fuck her in it 👍

sometimes i think love triangles should be resolved by polyamory but badly like everyone’s still mad

of course I recognize that discomfort tolerance is an essential skill for life generally and also for me getting better. however also it's absolute bullshit that the shit that causes me to feel so uncomfortable I want to tear my own skin off is just tuesday for like. most other people. like I know I'm not special for Having Anxiety but also I shouldn't have to experience mortal terror on a daily basis at my job okay

a vampire's long term fwbb (friend with blood benefits) making an idle remark about how it was a struggle to handle the aphrodisiac in the bite venom for the first while but now they're used to it and know to expect it and the vampire saying "hey um. so I don't have any bite venom. like at all."

biting the hand that feeds you is a sex act