(ง'̀-'́)ง

If I keep practicing I might even be a person soon

One single spider has been descending from a very long thread all the way from the moon and will very soon, we hope, carefully touch down on earth.

i could be the most incompetent attack dog youve ever seen

never going to be over that time I was trying to explain polyamory to my mum, and she said "I just don't understand how someone could be in love with two people at once" and I gave her my the-cognitive-dissonance-is-causing-me-physical-pain face and she said "what??" and I very quietly said "mother....you had an affair...."

posts funnier with timestamps on

free use? *smirks snartly* so naive. you know nothing in this damned society is really free...

therapypilled deadbeat father: I really don't have the headspace for custody right now

save me, rice mixed with some bullshit

i honestly don't really understand why "some people prefer watching gameplay online rather than playing games themselves" is treated as such a taboo when being a spectator is considered a pretty mundane way to engage with most sports, game shows, reality tv or even just like. chess.

Getting dumped really puts children's cartoon villains into perspective. Like dude you're SO right, love and caring ARE disgusting and we SHOULD cast a spell to drain all human emotion into your amulet.

Friend breakups are how you get lines like "Your friends? You think your friends are coming to save you? Don't make me laugh."

fuck its Already like 100 am

when tumblr dies i'll live under your bed and you can say out loud what you would post and i will say LIKE or REBLOG it'll be just like we're still here

i think the angriest ive ever made someone on reddit was when they used an emoji while arguing and i said "What is this tiny yellow picture"

who is the first david you think of when you hear the name david