Attachment Styles of Frozen
I wanted to discuss something I noticed after watching Frozen 2, that is also present in the first Frozen. I wanted to talk about the attachment styles of the sisters Anna and Elsa.
In a very clear cut way, Anna has a preoccupation (anxious) attachment style, and Elsa has a dismissive (avoidant) attachment style.
The simple imagery for this is that an avoidant person runs while a dependent person chases them, and this is pretty true for any relationship with these mixes. Sound familiar?
Elsa seems to have a dismissive (or avoidant) attachment style.
She is emotionally distant, and despite being closer to Anna now than she was in Frozen 1, she still rejects intimate relationships by keeping them a “safe” distance away or at arms length.
She does not want to depend on a partner, and is afraid to allow for a partner to lean on her. She often tries to prevent Anna from following her, and literally sends her away so that she may have this independence. She loves Anna, but she isn’t comfortable with having Anna come with her, depending on her.
Elsa is seen as someone who uses communication as a means to exchange intellectual ideas, rather than talk about emotions. Remember when she rained on Anna’s parade by telling her that she couldn’t marry a man she just met? (She was right, but she was very cold about it). She avoids conflict up until she reaches a point to explode. Elsa is cool, controlled, stoic, and self-sufficient. She is someone who limits her emotional range and prefers to do things alone. Elsa is also head strong, and so long as she’s not dealing with her own emotions, she’s pretty good in a crisis and will take charge.
What do you expect from a child whose parents were non responsive to her needs? They were disengaged and detached from an entire part of Elsa, telling her to conceal and hide parts of herself that were so obviously inseparable to her identity.
Anna has a preoccupied (or anxious) attachment style.
She seems to be insecure about her relationship with Elsa, and she’s worried that Elsa may reject or abandon her again, and she finds herself preoccupied with this relationship (Notice that this preoccupation even makes Kristoff feel forgotten at times). She often needs ongoing reassurance from Elsa that they will do things together (which is already rooted in conflict given what we know about Elsa). Anna’s underlying fear of loosing Elsa stems from her loosing her parents. Anna is overly sensitive to Elsa’s actions, her moods, and her choices. She was mad at Elsa for running into the fire (something Elsa could handle alone) because it implied that Elsa is ok with Anna not following her, and that scares her.
Anna is the opposite of Elsa in that she is highly emotional, and very expressive. When Elsa is reserved and closed off, Anna is vulnerable and taking up space.
Anna wants to blame Elsa for her distance, she has done so since they were young. (Asking Elsa "why do you shut the world out? What are you so afraid of?"). She is unaware that sometimes she may push her away with her own expectations, for example, telling Elsa (a magical being) to not go where Anna can’t follow. Anna is terrified of being alone, and places the expectation of Elsa always being there for her as she is always there for Elsa.
What do you expect from a child who was separated from all of her loved ones? After the incident with Anna getting struck in the head by Elsa’s powers, she was always viewed as too vulnerable to be trusted with Elsa, and was left dependent on the relationships of those around her. Which makes her desperate for love and affection.
So what’s so beautiful about the resolution of Frozen 2?
For Elsa to overcome her insecurities, she had to listen to a voice outside of herself. She had to learn to trust and follow something outside of herself. In doing so, she realized how much she needs Anna. That she can’t live in complete isolation, and that she does need other people: specifically her sister.
For Anna to overcome her insecurities, she had to listen to a voice inside herself. Once Olaf had faded away and she assumed Elsa was as good as dead, Anna has to learn to trust and follow something inside herself. In doing so, she realized that she does not have to be so dependent on Elsa. That she is her own person, and that she can’t live in complete dependency of another person. She needs to give people appropriate space and boundaries, and know that people still love her: specifically her sister.
They are coming together to be that bridge, and meeting each other in the middle to have some inner peace.
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