thinking about percy and vex’s love languages makes me go fucking insane holy shit
like listen listen they’re the very definition of “trauma didn’t make me stronger. trauma hurt me and i made me stronger.”
i hate the insistence of “greed” as one of vex’s character traits because it’s really not? i mean either it isn’t or we need to redefine greed. vex’s “greed” is a trauma response. this is something deeply fucking fascinating to me about the twins because they clearly went in two opposite direction in developing coping mechanisms–vax is impulsive to a fault, lives in the moment, does not plan well. if something is there that he wants, he takes it–the thing is that this most often happens with actions or experiences or even affection, so vax doesn’t get painted as “greedy”.
he’s about to die? fuck it, let’s kiss keyleth. that gap is closing but he can prooobaly squeeze through? time to sprint, never mind the broken rib. found the briarwoods? don’t let them get away, you need to try and get information out of them right now, fuck calling for backup. grog simply isn’t understanding his argument? it’s not worth continuing, he’s already walking away. he’s this perfect little intersection of adhd symptoms + resource insecurity.
meanwhile vex goes in the opposite direction–she gets legitimately freaked out if someone is using the party funds without permission and spends a lot of time budgeting, managing their inventory, and making sure they have everything they need. she’s less likely to take something she wants or even needs, for herself or her party, out of fear that it means there won’t be enough later. on the surface it seems greedy or uptight or whatever but the entire thing is motivated out of a driving need for her chosen family to never do without. it’s not like vex controls the party funds so tightly so she can buy herself whatever she wants when no one is looking–no, it’s so they always have enough to buy more fucking healing potions. every time vex snaps at someone for, say, losing the flying carpet, there’s this deep and underlying fear, in my mind at least, that it’ll mean she won’t be able to take care of them as well. every single money related move vex makes is to take care of the party
and then percy, who grew up knowing what it was to have everything and not feeling, one way or the other, much burdened by the accompanying responsibilities or particularly pleased with being royalty…percy, introduced to trauma and tragedy just as early in life as vex was and unable to imagine that the blame was anything but his, percy, who came to understand poverty later in life but never found it as painful as the burden of his perceived guilt…
“Since the day I’ve met her, I’ve given her every bloody dime I’ve made. So, yes. I no longer even think about it anymore.”
“She’s practically the royal treasurer. She’s just happier that way.”
this is DIFFICULT!!! not because percy cares so much about having money, it’s never really made much of a difference to him one way or another–but because he KNOWS vex!! he knows what this means for her! he knows this makes her happy, and he also understands that this is how vex loves him. and he lets her.
for so much of their early relationship, their interactions consist of vex’s “goddammit, let me love you, percy” being blocked by percy’s crippling self hatred not allowing himself any form of comfort or hell even humanity that could come with viewing vex as anything more than an ally.
but he gives her his money. he knows. he understands, at this point. percy gives vex money in an act that is oddly full of self love, and vex accepts percy’s title, percy’s arrows–the only things for her, the only things not closely guarded and measured out to take care of everyone but her. it’s a self perpetuating cycle of love and healing.
origamiaround
gamechangershow
vaporwave
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
