ONE / WISH.

im your freaky nikki!!1!1!

im your freaky nikki!!1!1!

“ you have nothing to apologize for. ” mack murmurs into her hair, then pulls back and tilts her face towards his. why would he blame her for this? whatever had snapped inside of her for a moment, he wouldn't hold it against her. he'd wished for something like this when he was in the throes of his own mental health struggles, someone that just listened. he didn't want to be that way, but he couldn't stop it. having no one there for him when he went through his own problems was hard — he couldn't do it to her. he wouldn't. “ i... i get it. not exactly what you went through, but losing yourself after it. watching from outside. ” he runs his thumb under her eye, wiping away a few of the tears that pour over onto her cheek. “ i'm not going anywhere. i promise. ”

she had everything to apologize for. he didn't deserve to be on the other end of whatever monster was inside of her, sucking up the good and throwing up the bad. whatever bear had done to her left a mark, and now she couldn't even enjoy her time with someone she liked without threatening to spill over into madness. it was horrifying. worse so knowing that it could happen at any moment, because of anything. but as mack tilted up her head, wiped away her tears so gently she could barely feel the pad of his thumb, nikki believed him when he said he understood. she didn't know his whole story, but there was something in his eyes, his tone, that said he was telling the truth. 'really . . . ?' it could be a question to any of his statements, but nikki had asked specifically for his promise. she sniffled some, glancing between his eyes with her own watery ones. 'i wouldn't, like . . . blame you if you wanted to leave. or wanted me to leave, i . . .' but she wanted him to keep his promise, and she suddenly had no doubts that he would. 'i just don't want you to look at me differently now . . .'

“ hey, come on in. ” he steps to the side, letting her enter his apartment before returning to the kitchen. mack watches her look around before he starts slicing the meat for their meal, then looks back up at her with a grin. “ i hope this all tastes good. next time, i gotta make you japanese food. that's definitely my strong suit. ” he glances at the rest of his counter, knowing he's probably made too much but still hoping there will be enough. “ i made carne asada, refried beans, pico de gallo, guacamole, and there's some sour cream and lettuce in the fridge that i'll take out in a second. i didn't make those, though. ”

she was shy. she'd never been shy, before. around people she liked, people she was attracted to, they'd never know she had feelings at all. but a lot had changed between her old life and her new one, so when she knocked on the door and peeked into his apartment, nikki freeman was sheepish. enough that her hands remained scrunched into the arms of the too long hoodie she wore as she closed the door behind her. inhale was taken, scent of carne asada bringing her back to a home she could barely remember, anymore. it nearly brought tears to her eyes, but nikki was still composed enough to keep herself together. 'it smells freaking incredible, i can't imagine it tasting bad,' she allotted herself a chuckle as she approached, glancing over the feast and feeling as if she didn't deserve it. she wish she did, but she didn't. and glancing at mack, nikki had the urge to cry, to hug him, to thank him for this and everything else he'd done for her. 'you spoiled me. thank you, i don't . . . god, when was the last time i even had a home cooked meal?' another chuckle to hide whatever else she was feeling. 'you're eating with me, right? i can't eat all this alone,'

Obsession (2026)

— Sylvia Plath, from Three Women in “The Collected Poems Of Sylvia Plath” (via atreides)

Inde Navarrette by Emily Sandifer for ASHOT Magazine (May 2026)