lost

most people might’ve experienced something called embarrassment in damon’s position. frances baker had been a patient, and damon hadn’t treated her any differently than he did the others. they were toys to him. most toys, however, didn’t wake up one day with their memory intact and become part of the staff. now, what, he was supposed to treat her with some sort of respect? the word wasn’t necessarily in damon’s vocabulary. he knew how he was expected to act, towards both patients and staff, but what about someone who’d been both? he hadn’t even realized he’d been examining her until she addressed him. as per usual, she exuded warmth, but he remained frigid. “ don’t patronize me, lady. and don’t expect me to act all hospitable now that you’ve duped people into believing it’s a good idea that you work here. once a patient, always a patient after all. ”

Frances had never truly been committed to Saint Dymphna - she was simply taking up a bed. The priest over the asylum had found her all those months ago, taken her in with the agreement of the local authorities, and helped her to regain her memory so that she could know what had happened to her. Being a missing person whose husband tried to murder her, after all, didn’t seem like the best combination of circumstances to send Frances home to before she got her memory back. Now that she did, however, she was pleased to be back to her old ways; it had been a couple of years since she’d held a job due to her husbands insistence, but she’d kept her nursing license renewed for this exact reason - when she was able, she wanted to be right back in it. A little smirk settled on the woman’s lips as she tilted her head to the side, a soft hum slipping past her lips. “Well, well, if it isn’t my least favorite person,” She shifted, crossing one leg over the other to get more comfortable in her chair. Frances could be rude as well - her kindness came with a price, after all. “You can act however you want, honey, but so can I. And you know what? You, my dear, can go fuck yourself with that little opinion of yours.”

“Why, Miss Frances, I didn’t know it was possible, but you look better than I’ve ever seen you.” Rhett smiled at her, reaching out to take hers gently.

“How have you been?”

It had been a while since he’d seen Frances last, but knew that she’d needed time to set her affairs in order. He couldn’t fault her that much.

Frances smiled softly, giving a gentle squeeze to the man’s hand as he spoke. “I’ve been okay, though I must say, the way things have been going have made me feel a lot better,” With the trial, it had taken a lot out of her, but she was happy with the outcome. “My piece of shit husband got sentenced, so he won’t be showing his face for a while, which will be nice. How have you been, darling?”

“I mean, I can think of multiple holidays that aren’t bad, but Christmas is one of my favorites.” Halloween and Thanksgiving followed closely as a second favorite because he enjoyed spooky things and who didn’t LOVE eating? He returned the woman’s grin with one of his own, nodding his head in her direction. “Actually, I’d love that. I can probably con someone into getting us some popcorn. We’ll hog the couch and television.” Hallmark was one of the best parts of this holiday. Though, he had to admit he also liked adding some scary Christmas movies to the mix. Like Krampus, for instance. 

“Oh, me too, but Christmas is certainly my favorite.” Frances had always loved the holiday season, though she did have more of a love for Christmas than any of the others. She was starting to remember, and was getting some small flashes of certain memories, and she knew that she loved the holidays now. “Hey, that sounds like a good plan. You get us some popcorn, I’ll hold our places on the couch and keep a hold on the television remote,” She certainly didn’t plan on giving it to anyone else, of course - not when they wanted to watch some stupid bullshit. “And we’ve got our day made. How about that?”

If there was one thing Bella enjoyed, it was making other people happy. Despite the fact that she was terrified of everyone, she never wanted anyone to think they were anything less than perfect. Sure, she was afraid they’d all hurt her, but that didn’t stop her from wanting to actually help. “Of course. ‘cause if you’re nice me then I… I’ll be nice to you and you are smiling, so…” she explained. There were quite a few guards she could talk into getting her a lighter, knowing full well that none of them saw her as a threat. The brunette probably couldn’t hurt a fly. A light laugh slipped through her lips. “Oh. It’s fun if you’re ever bored. Do you want me to go get it for you? I think there are s-some guards over there who might gimme one.”

“Well, I certainly do plan on being nice to you - I’m nice to everyone until they give me a reason not to be.” Frances had been raised that way; as long as someone was kind to her, she’d be kind in return. If they were rude, she’d be rude. Mean, she’d be mean right back. But this young woman seemed kind enough, which she enjoyed. “Would you mind doing that?” She asked, head tilting to the side a bit. “I would love to be able to smoke my cigarette, honey, as long as you don’t mind fetching the lighter.”

Sometimes, being a guard was a little tricky, because not only did you have to watch out for the safety of the patients, but he had to follow the rules as well. There were times when the lines between the two were blurred. Riley nodded, hoping that he could actually trust the woman to tell him the truth. “Alright, if you say so.” And so, he just stood there, watching the rest of the room, hoping no one would cause any problems. However as the woman continued to talk, Riley turned to face her properly to listen. “Oh. In that case, is there anything I an do to help? Can I get you anything? Are they making your time here comfortable?”

Frances relaxed as much as she could into the couch and smoked her cigarette, humming softly to herself. She loved the peace and quiet that seemed to fall over the room whenever a guard was around; if she wanted this kind of quiet any other time, she had to stay in her room away from everyone else. But now was nice, and she enjoyed it. And then he continued to speak, which she didn’t mind either, but it took her a minute to come back from her own thoughts and register what he was saying. “Oh, no, honey, but thank you,” She shook her head. “I’m very comfortable, yes. I’m hoping to go home soon - I’ve been remembering more these last few days, you know. Things are becoming more clear now.”

Lucky felt like he could stay nestled against her side for the entire day. He hadn’t felt so safe and content in a long time. In here, he usually just felt guarded, alone and scared. He felt like he constantly had to watch his back, and keep on his toes. “You really think so?” He wrote, his smile never leaving his face. “I think you’re very lovely, you’ve been so kind to me.”He leaned further into her touch. The woman had managed to calm his brain, the thoughts of his nightmares slowly beginning to slip away.

Truthfully, if the boy stayed here with her all day, Frances wouldn’t mind it. She loved moments like this with her own children, and being able to help someone that was feeling down just made the situation better. She was usually more concerned with others than herself, now being one of those times, and she wanted the boy to be happy. “I really think so, I do,” She said with a nod, looking over at him and smiling. “Aw, well, thank you, sweetheart. I think you’re very lovely, too. I want to help make you feel better.”

Glutinous phalanges reached to retrieve his own item back into possession, eyes twinkling against the sparking light that illuminated when the lighter was flicked. A flutter of gray hit the floor and caused a dark CHUCKLE to rumble in his throat. The cleaning team wouldn’t appreciate the SINGED carpet, but he could only dream the butts would be enough to light the place up and burn it to the ground. “I’ve been better,” he admitted, eyes trailing to the television set that was BLARING some pathetic soap opera he couldn’t keep his eyes on for more than a few milliseconds. “I hear you PESTERED one of my new guards a few days ago. I figured I’d badger you about it and get both sides of the story.”

Frances knew that maybe, just maybe, she should show a bit more concern for where she flicked her cigarette ash in this place, but then again she figured it wasn’t her problem. She certainly wasn’t the worst smoker in here, and at least didn’t put her cigarettes out on the furniture or in the carpet, and figured the cleaning crew was used to it by now, anyway. “Oh, did I?” She hummed, a little smile starting to spread across her lips. “Hmm, I guess maybe I did, huh? Though, I’d prefer it if you didn’t badger me - a tame conversation sounds better to me, Dante, darling.”

The moment the menu even came up on screen Charlie brightened, the way she curled in on herself more for settling in now than for comforting anxiety. As the woman came to sit back down, the tinier female cuddled deep into her side, head leaning over to rest on her shoulder. Arms hugging her knees to her chest. large hazel eyes were instantly glued to the screen, though she nodded happily to the idea of a movie marathon, especially if she got a viewing of her movie first. Smiling up at the older woman for a moment, she gave a wiggle to snuggle a bit closer and returned her attention to the screen as she started softly humming along to not only the songs but the music that underlined even some dialogue. 

Frances wrapped her arm around the girl and held her close, a little smile on her lips as she felt the other snuggling up to her. She missed this, even if she couldn’t quite remember her own children at the moment. But she was trying, and this type of thing helped; the type of stimulation, the motherly instincts, it all helped to bring back her memory piece by piece. She needed to get well and get out of here - she needed to get back to her family. “You really like this movie, huh?” She asked, her smile widening a bit before she leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of the girl’s head. 

Shifting for a moment, Bella took a step closer to the woman, whispering softly, “I can probably get one for you. A lot of the guards don’t think I’m a threat, so they’ll let me hug them and I can take things.” Now, normally, she didn’t talk as much, really didn’t talk as much. Long sentences were difficult, because she was afraid they’d start to hate her. With every word she spoke, Bella found herself more and more paranoid. But she could do this, she really could. Tilting her head to the side, she pouted. “You’ve never done it? It’s not so hard. It takes a while, but… it’s pretty cool.”

“Oh, really? Well, well... I may just take you up on that offer, then.” Frances said with a little smile. She didn’t want the girl to get in trouble, but that want was a lot lower on the list of priorities she had than getting a lighter was. “I never have, no,” She shook her head, shifting a bit in her seat to get more comfortable on the couch. “Oh, honey, I don’t think I’d have the patience to even try it. When I need a fire, I want it asap.”

            “what?” the brunette was quick to retaliate against the other. her defensiveness had got her fired from her job as she insisted on arguing when she felt like they were wrong. it hadn’t always been a negative but these days, luisa just couldn’t let go. “so you join them?” shaking her head in disbelief, the woman licked her lips and crossed her arms. she could feel herself begin to race through the situation without thinking about how to resolve it. “do you think this is funny?” her frustration wasn’t about the smoke anymore, luisa herself didn’t know what it was about but she felt like she needed to get it out. the other was probably the best person for it as she didn’t seem to be as reactive as she was being. she missed her children, she had missed the older three since they had moved out but the younger two were still living with her up until she had been admitted into hospital. she knew that the oldest was worried and she had every right to be but also knew that her mother meant well. luisa wasn’t a malicious person, she just had difficulty identifying her unhealthy behavioral patterns.

Frances didn’t care whose feelings she hurt, at this point. Everyone around here was fucking crazy and she was getting sick of being around it - they were starting to drive her up a wall, much like this woman was in this moment, and she was getting tired of it. Her memory, the last few days, had been coming back better than ever and it seemed to be a great improvement. If she could bust down the last barrier holding her back, if she could unleash the waiting memories that seemed to lie just behind the floodgates, she could get out of here and go back to her normal life. “Do I look like I’m laughing?” She asked, brows raising as she looked at the woman. “Yes, I do, because if there’s no way to save the place from smelling like smoke, then there’s no point in avoiding smoking indoors.” Frances didn’t care what the other woman was going through - all she cared about was the rudeness coming from the woman and she wasn’t going to put up with it. Frankly, she was just going to walk away if she kept it up - she had no patience for rude people, especially those who thought they could make rules and tell everyone else what to do. That wasn’t going to happen. “So, if you don’t like it, you can move along, missy.”

Nodding ever so slightly, mousy brown tresses moving about her face as her eyes studied the woman from behind them and her knees. She seemed nice, and that was nice, but she was still anxious from her startling. At least until it turned out they’d get to watch the movie. Instantly she perked up, head lifting from her knees as he seemed to uncurl a little, eagerly shifting to get into a better position to watch the movie that she loved so much. The sounds of groans the moment the menu even popped up was completely ignored by her, for she’d watch it on a loop for days on end if they’d let her. Nothing calmed her more than the escapism of old musicals. 

Frances got up and put the movie in the dvd player, fiddling with the thing for a moment before it started to play. Not having access to the dvd player remote was a pain, but she figured it was alright to do it the manual way if it meant making this little girl happy, even if it was aggravating to have to do it the hard way. “There we go,” She said, finally hitting the play button and going to sit back on the couch. “Now - after this, how about you watch some Hallmark Christmas movies with me, hmm? We can have a little movie marathon.”

Angeline’s brows came together quickly and she shook her head, tsking softly, “Oh, hush Frances. I’m sure they’d love to see you, and you will see them soon. I can promise that. There’s nothing more sacred than a love between a mother and their children. God gave us that burden so that children would always know how we love them.” She said, or at least that’s what she’d like to believe. Her own mother had died very suddenly so Angeline never really got to know her but she tried to be the best mother she could be to her little daughter. It was hard always being gone and with the divorce but she tried her best. Another small smile pulled at Angeline’s lips as she waved a dismissive hand. “I do my job so I can see the smiling faces on the patients and so God will bless me.” She hummed. Angeline bounced a little on her feet as she gave a small rouse of claps. “Oh I love the Hallmark movies, the special effects are always so terrible.!” She giggled, covering her mouth as she laughed. 

“I just... Miss them so much, y’know?” She didn’t even remember her children, or how many she had, but she knew she had them and knew that she missed them. The hole in a mothers head when missing her children was one that couldn’t be filled until she saw her children again. They didn’t know where she was, though, and she didn’t know where they were. Overall, it was a bit of a mess. But being here, safe, was better than her previous situation, she knew that much. Whatever had caused her memory loss had been bad, and that was obvious by the bruises that littered her body when she’d first arrived on the steps of the asylum. “Right?” She flashed the woman a grin, reaching up to push some hair back from her face. “You should sit with me and watch some this afternoon. I’m sure no one would mind it too much as long as there’s no trouble happening.”

Touché, he thought. She had a point. If the cigarettes hadn’t killed her and she was still going strong, who was he to say smoking was bad? Perhaps if he picked up the habit he wouldn’t be such a ball of fucking anxiety all the time, but he couldn’t bring himself to put his mouth around something that could kill him and KILL his health in the process. Brown orbs danced to the television, a grin plastered over his features. “Gotta say this is my favorite time of the year simply because of these movies.” Hallmark always had the best Christmas movies. It didn’t matter WHO you were, you would watch them one way or another. “It’s nice to meet you, Frances.” She was nice. He liked her already.

That was Frances’s point of view, honestly. For as long as she’d been alive, forty-some-odd years, and the cigarettes hadn’t killed her yet? She saw no problem with them and didn’t see the point in getting onto her about it. A lecture about the dangers of cigarettes would no nothing to change her habit. “Me too - I love Christmas. As they say, it truly is the most wonderful time of the year,” She said with a smile, reaching up to pat the other’s arm gently. “It’s nice to meet you too, sweet boy. Wanna catch a movie this afternoon? Hallmark is supposed to be showing some new ones.”

As the woman lit her cigarette, Riley watched her, as if something awful and horrible would happen if she accidentally lit something on fire. While he knew that really wasn’t going to be the case, but he couldn’t help but worry. There were days when he wanted nothing more than to light up and not think about everyone else, but he’d behave. Nodding, he pursed his lips, feeling fairly uneasy about handing someone a light just like that. “You’re welcome.” As he took it back, he shoved it into his pocket, wondering how she was allowed to just do that. Was he even allowed to ask? “You’re not gonna get in trouble though, are you? I mean, we’re not going to… No one’s going to get mad if you’re in here smoking, are they?”

Frances took a long drag from her cigarette once it was lit, leaning back against the couch with a soft sigh before exhaling the smoke. Being without nicotine for  good part of the morning was starting to get on her nerves, so having those nerves calmed now was certainly nice and it was something she needed. “I’m not gonna get in trouble for anything, sweet boy.” Should she explain to him? She supposed that she should, because he seemed to be quite concerned. “They say that I’ve been in the newspapers - missing. I’m only here until I can start to remember what happened.” Until she could remember why she was missing, until she could remember that her husband had thought she was dead and was discarding her body, that she was supposed to be dead in the woods and was considered to be a missing person for the time being.

“I hope she takes care of me forever and ever.” He wrote, his head leaning against the woman. It felt nice to have someone stroke through his hair, and speak softly to him. He found it so hard to trust anyone after his father, believing most people would end up hurting him. “My name is Lucien. you can cell me that or Lucky” He wrote again, smiling gently at the other. “It’s lovely to meet you, Frances.”

Frances smiled softly and leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of Lucien’s head. This, more than anything, helped her. She was a mother herself, though right now she couldn’t remember much about her own children, and feeling her mothering instincts and urges be met was helping her brain to clear of the fog, even if only slightly. “I think she’ll stay with you forever,” She agreed with a nod, giving him a gentle squeeze. “Well, Lucky, you’re a sweetheart. You’re a very sweet boy.”

For a long moment, Charlie studied the woman, head tilted a little to the side before she took a hesitant step forward, inching her way forward like a nervous mouse, Dvd still clutched white knuckled to her chest. Eventually lowering down into the spot at her side, legs curled up to her chest, draped in fabric that was thrifted uncountable times and nearly antique when she’d gotten it. Though it’d been tailored crudely by herself years ago the careful stitches were barely noticeable and had held up well. Looking up at the woman over knees hugged to her chest, a small freckled hand held out the movie she’d been so desperately holding. Watch it? 

Frances watched as the girl moved, questioning internally what her deal was. She wasn’t judgmental by any means, and knew that everyone had their own problems - she was just curious. But she also knew that it wasn’t her place to ask someone why they’d been committed to the institution, she didn’t ask and wouldn’t ask unless prompted. When the film was presented to her, the woman took it in her hands and looked at it with a smile. “You want to watch this?” She asked, lifting her gaze to meet the girl’s. Well, she figured she could catch her Hallmark movie some other time. “We can watch this, if you’d like. I haven’t seen this in ages.”