brain waste

Your so TOXIC i have to but a WARNING Label on myself

Shes back and its easy to be in the library when she is there. Its bright happy cheerful safe but when the library closes and she is off to bed is when i cant help but check on my lost pages. Yup still stuck on the dead branch inches from a nest. Its crazy not to long ago the crow was prepping me to be part of its nest but i guess forgot i was here since it has seemed to have filled its bed with scraps off the ground below. I wish she didnt have to sleep i wish she didnt have to leave, to shut off the lights so i could stay with her always but its not her that ventors back, its me. I flip to the pages that are gone. Why? When she has already made me new. I will sleep in the dark tonight because i want to be in the library when she wakes up. Not in a cold dead tree. But as i wait for her, i still hope the tree blooms.

No matter how loud i sing you will never hear my pain

I want to forget but than she can suprise me I never want to be caught of guard again but these walls are getting heavy.

Im not okay when im alone.

My dreams were once my safety, my escape from the stress of you. I guess your venom flows deep because you have taken over my sanctuary.

The ground is so far away. Everything below is a blur. I am moving fast I feel the wind in my pages. Than it hits me. The pain. The crows claws are piercing straight through me. Everything happend so fast, why am i just now feeling it. Wait... I see her. How am i in two places, this is strange. I can see her calmly sitting in front of me with glue and thread. She has a smile on her face as she fixes the void of pages the crow now has. We fly for a while. Does this damn bird even know where its going or where its going to leave me? Wish the dumb thing would turn around and bring me back to her.

I am safe. My cover has been restored, my spine glued back together i am whole again. I am the only book she is allowed to read. She reads my pages carefully understanding each chapter. She knows what the beginning was like and has an idea on how she wants it to end. I love when its just us on a sunny windowsill with her hair pulled back i can see myself in her glasses as she reads. Is this the way she sees me? Today wouldve been like any other but on this day a crow flew through the window and startled her, she dropped me as she watched the crow destroy the library knocking down everything in its path. She chased it away but not before it ripped a page or two right out of me. Where did they go? What will the crow do with them? Will i ever get them back so i can continue my stories with her?

I dont get why she likes me Her energy excites me

If we like each other watch out cause you just got a wife 😂❤💕

Its happening..again. But she knows how to read me better than my self. She plucked me off the shelf and has opened me up, but shes gentle. I cant let her read it all at once or she might put me down. I wonder how much she tells the librarian? This one is tricky because i must remind myself to stay in this form because any other and i will ruin it all.

Addicts are not horrible people. Are they capable of horrible things? Sure. But who isnt. Some people will recover. Some will struggle for ever. I am not mad at the disease thats what it is. Im not mad at the relapse its only a hurdle. But the betrayl was something outside of then disease. Or was it? I dont want to make excuses for you but i must fill in the blanks since you wont for me.

Dear Future Wife, I wanna stare at you when youre not looking. Kiss you mid sentence. Have a goofy photoshoot. I wanna tell you my dreams and hear yours without fear of judgement. I wanna geek out together over our favorite things. I wanna surprise you at work. And wake up to your beautiful face. I want to be your peace and partner. Im going through some things so i can be ready for you. I cant wait!!

Seems like people rather show you there thoti than show you there heart.