whose smile sparks a flame

crush totally wasn't impressed by my miraculous flying machine fml

oh my god i just saw her get onto an airship with a woman whose tophat has at least twice as many sprockets as mine. i will be killing myself with an elaborate pneumatic pistol tonight

"hear me out" and it's a picture of the most fuckable building you've ever seen. c'mon now.

“hear me out” and it’s the fucking dildopolis

I hate that when you’re stressed enough your body just starts falling apart. I think it should realize you’re already stressed and don’t need that and start functioning better actually

Donkey about to get the fuckin drop on father konstaninos - photographer unknown

"muscle mommy" "cardio bunny" these women don't fucking KNOW you bro

accidentally let slip "you will be buried in my pyramid when I die" to a coworker last week btw

"I'll save you!" I cry as swords begin to erupt from my body and I scream in agony (it's not really clear how this is helping you)