Sitting there and waiting for her answer seemed like a whole eternity to him. Yes, it actually had been maybe a minute but for someone who was just proposing to the love of his life, it felt a way longer. And he was so positive, so optimistic that Harley would say yes. She was the perfect match for him, just as he was for her. Josh was convinced about it. But as longer he was waiting, as more he started thinking that there was actually a reason why she hesitated. But who was he to take it very serious right away. He would try to make a light joke, lighten up the mood that seemed to drop more with each second. âUsually, you donât take so long to say yes.â he chuckled softly but seriously, he started sweating now as well. He swallowed, his heart beating faster and faster as he waited for her answer. And suddenly, Harley tried to say something. Instead, she just got up and left for the bathroom. If that was morning sickness kicking in, it couldnât be a badder moment. But he still tried to relax. Maybe it was really just that, not the fact that she didnât want to marry him. Getting up and following her, he found the bathroom to be locked. That was the moment where he really started questioning it.Â
âHarley, love, why did you lock yourself in there?â he asked, still trying to smile but he knew what was to come. He just wasnât ready to admit it. âHey, please, open the door. Morning sickness is just the start of what else is to come.â he hoped it was just that. But he knew it wasnât. âOr did you actually got sick of my horrible way or proposing to you?â he laughed a little. It was a nervous laugh.
Harley placed her back against the door, trying her best to control her breathing. She heard Josh on the outside, she could hear that there was a bit of hurt in his voice. He tried his best to keep positive outside that door, and it just broke her heart. Just she wasnât ready. She wasnât even ready to face Josh and tell him no. If she told him no was he going to leave her? That was the last thing she wanted. She wanted to be with him forever, she is in love with him. It is just her stupid ex fiance that ruined this for her, bringing these horrible memories back. All she could think about is what if her and Josh did get married and send out invitations? All these people showed up and then they decided to call it off? She couldnât do this twice.Â
Harley thought about it for a long time, and decided on telling Josh the truth. He will understand, at least she hoped. Eventually, after what felt like a good ten minutes, Harley finally opened the bathroom door and looked up at Josh. Her heart felt like it was about to explode in her chest. The rest of her body just felt numb. She finally took in a deep breath and slowly exhaled, âJosh... we need to talk...â She started off before taking his hand and taking him to the couch to sit down. Harley held onto his hand, looking down as she began lacing their fingers together. âI feel like itâs time to explain something that I never really wanted to share with anyone...â She then looked up into his eyes. âBack in high school I had a boyfriend. He and I were supposed to be forever. We were engaged, and we actually made it up to the day before the wedding. I was at my happiest, but apparently he wasnât. We only been with each other, so I guess he needed to make sure I was the one... so he slept with someone else. To make matters worse it was with my so-called best friend.â She paused for a moment, looking down as she began to play with his fingers. âI actually went over to his place and caught them. Here we had all these people that flew in for the wedding, and we wasted their time. He wasted my time, and also wasted a friendship. I couldnât trust anyone, and I figured being so cold towards people I would just push people away.â She then smiled a little to herself before looking back up. âThen you came along. No matter how harsh I have been towards you, you still moved out here to New York for me. No one has done that for me, and I am finding myself trusting someone again. You are slowly bringing back that old Harley out, just this Harley is afraid to get married. Many things are running through my mind, and I am just not sure if I am ready. I want you to understand I want to be with you forever, just that little part in me is still scared.â