Alicent Hightower thinks to be loved is to be used, and there's no clearer example of that than how her children turn out. I don't think it's necessarily her fault, she doesn't know any better, she's never experienced normal parental love from her most prominent parental figure. Otto Hightower pratically sells his daughter out to a man old enough to be her father, and when Alicent married Viserys, Otto's love and pride comes only when that price is paid. She is used again by both Viserys and Otto in the birth of Aegon, and once again because she is useful, because she has given something away, she is momentarily granted affection she does not usually recieve. To Alicent, people have only loved her once they have used her, and I think this trauma cycle really echoes in all her children.
I saw someone suggest that Season 2 Aemond's "mummy issues" did not fit the image of Season 1 Aemond, who is objectively a mummy's boy. I get maybe where this view comes from, but I do disagree. I think, in a very unspoken manner, we see that Aemond's (and Aegon, but this post is already getting long) relationship with his mother is similar to Alicents relationship with her father. I don't think she does it intentionally at all, and she's obviously not selling Aemond out, but there's a lingering feeling of almost love bombing in their relationship. Alicent loves Aemond when he's of use to her, because that's the only way she knows how to love anyone. She loves him when he's hurt, when he gains a dragon, when he goes to find Aegon, when he's comforting her. But she cannot face him when he has disappointed her. I don't think it's her intention to come off that way, in private with Otto she defends him, almost understands his actions though she does not agree with them, but she doesn't know how to show she still loves him, because he's not of use to her at the moment.
And Aemond? Well, his issues develope from all of this. He has always been loved, because he has always been of use, especially emotionally, to his mother. He doesn't know how to deal with this absence of affection. To an extent, Alicent is prehaps the person who knows him best, especially in his anger at Lucerys, and without her, he seeks both love and understanding from a woman that looks and is aged close enough to her that he can delude himself.
I think something a lot of people overlook with Aemond is that he's, in the grand scheme of things, still very young. I thinks he's supposed to be 19 in the show, and though that of course is no excuse for his attack on Lucerys, it does shed light, and rationalise, his emotional instability. Here's a young adult who, in his eyes, has never been good enough to experience parental love from his father, and has seemingly ruined his relationship with the one person who might truly understand him. I think there's a big point to be made in Aemond's scarring to. He has been permanently disfigured by Lucerys, he's missing a main feature in his face, and has highly visible scarring. That's a big thing for anyone to deal with, but especially a young adult who's family, for all intensive purposes, are prehaps the most attractive in the seven kingdoms. There's a big insecurity there, seen in the fact that his face is always covered in all but once scene, and I think its fair to assume Aemond might feel that no one may ever love him romantically, or atleast choose him, when he is both a second son, and the scarred member of his family.
In my opinion, Aemond seeking out comfort makes perfect sense. He wants love and understanding, and is never quite sure if he'll get it again, due to his mother's distance, thus he pays for it.
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