???

are you kidding me ?

[ name ] ,  what just happened ?

hey !  what’d you do that for ?

did you plan on ever telling me ?

do you want to tell me the truth ,  this time ?

you seriously think i could’ve done this ?

did you know about this ?

[ name ] ,  what were you thinking ?!

can we talk ?  alone ?

why are you doing all of this ?

it can’t be that bad ,  right ?

haven’t you heard the stories ?

who did this to you ?

what are you insinuating ?

what did you think was gonna happen ?!

you think i could do something like that ?

who do you think you are ?

why won’t you let me help you ?

do you have any evidence of that ?

can we put away our differences for a second ?

where have you been ? 

is that  …  blood ?

what’s your problem ?

are you real ?

where’s your sense of adventure ?

would you kill for me ?

you’re  [ name ] ,  aren’t you ?

why can’t you just let it go ?

do you want me to stay ?

what if we left  …  ran away ?

what else was i supposed to do ?

how did you get this scar ?

could you give me a hand with this ?

do you ever stop talking ?

you’ve never done this before ,  have you ?

where do you think you’re going ?

how many fingers am i holding up ?

what can i say to make it better ?

why can’t we all just get along ?

can i stay the night ?

what’s that supposed to mean ?

where did your common sense go ?

you seriously don’t believe me ?

what aren’t you telling me ?

do you have a minute ?

why are you lying ?

you’re gonna walk away from this ?

where am i supposed to go ?

can we stop and think about this rationally ?

how long has it been since you’ve slept ?

why can’t we be civil about this ?

what makes you so special ?

where is all of this coming from ?

how are we gonna get out of here ?

you’ll never leave me ,  right ?

were you in on this ?

care to join me for a bit ?

shows what you know ,  doesn’t it ?

do you want to get out of here ?

what were you expecting to happen ?

what are you working on ?

i can tell you’re upset ,  what happened ?

when can i see you again ?

where do we go from here ?

can you sit up for me ?

how long have you been awake ?

what are you getting out of this ?

can we put this behind us ?

where are you ?  nobody’s heard from you .

how can i make this go away ?

were you following me ?

where does it hurt ?  show me .

[ name ] ,  what the hell ?

hey  …  can i ask you something ?

you’re not gonna tell me where we’re going ?

really ?  you’re gonna do that right here ?

are you even listening to me ?

we can help each other ,  right ?

hey  …  did you hear that ?

you have no idea who i am ,  do you ?

how long have you known ?

what exactly are you asking me to do ?

how was i supposed to know that ?

are you new around here ?

can you stop and listen to me for a second ?

do you think there’s something wrong with me ?

what ,  you think i’m not qualified ?

why did you help me ?

can you just look at me ,  please ?

what can i do to convince you ?

where did we go wrong ?

oh my god ,  are you bleeding ?

why the long face ?

are you trying to get yourself killed ?

what do you make of this ?

how much do you wanna bet ?

you’re sure this will work ?

why are you so concerned about me ?

what are you trying to prove ?

did you ever care about me ?

are you drunk ?

isn’t this amazing ?

how long have you been standing there ?

what are you suggesting ?

why are you such a pessimist ?

did you know them ?

can we call it a day ?

finally kissing the person you’ve been pining for .

a kiss shared during a game  ( truth or dare ,  spin the bottle ,  etc ) .

kissing your lover to show you forgive them .

neck kisses that turn into love bites .

wiping away your lover’s tears as you kiss them .

a kiss to prove you don’t have feelings for them .

a last kiss before one goes away .

biting your lover’s lip amidst a kiss .

an emotional kiss bringing one party to tears .

a kiss while being reunited after a long time .

kissing your lover in a moment of sheer joy .

a kiss while slow dancing .

sharing a spontaneous kiss with a stranger .

an abrupt ,  heated kiss during the middle of a fight .

kissing them to shut them up .

a kiss to wake your lover up in the morning .

sharing a kiss in a heavy downpour of rain .

kissing your partner to seal a marriage .

a possessive kiss that is meant to stake a claim .

a kiss to resolve suppressed romantic/sexual tension .

a kiss attempting to convince the other party to stay .

kissing the top of their head as you hold them .

a risky kiss between forbidden lovers .

stolen kisses while hiding away from a crowd .

a kiss that leaves lipstick stains .

a kiss shared on a rooftop while the sun sets .

a flirtatious kiss on the back of the hand .

sneaking off to a public bathroom to make out .

a kiss on the forehead as the other sleeps .

an  ( accidental / mutually )  drunken kiss .

caging your lover against a wall with your arms to kiss them .

a kiss after joining your lover in the shower .

a kiss after receiving good news .

a tentative ,  exploratory kiss between friends .

a kiss shared between enemies during combat .

kissing your lover after believing you’d lost them .

a kiss after a devastating event ,  meant to comfort .

a possessive kiss in front of a jealous third party .

kissing your lover under the night sky while stargazing .

a kiss between two people in a fake relationship .

a kiss that seals a promise .

kissing your lover lazily first thing in the morning .

holding your lover by the jaw to kiss them .

kissing the tears from their cheeks .

a kiss to your lover’s stomach as you travel down their body .

an abrupt kiss that you melt into after a moment of hesitation .

sleepy ,  domestic morning kisses in the kitchen while making breakfast .

a rushed kiss before one party leaves for work .

:)

Is

Is riding position not normal

A collection of sentence prompts from some of my favourite The Smiths and Morrissey songs. some are slightly nsfw, and there may be triggering themes present. feel free to change pronouns or combine the starters as you see fit !! 

unhappy birthday:

“ I’ve come to wish you an unhappy birthday. “ 

“ you’re evil, and you lie. “ 

“ If you should die, I may feel slightly sad, but I won’t cry. “ 

“ loved and lost. “ 

“ when usually it’s nothing, surely you’re happy that it is this way. “ 

“ I said no. “ 

“ then I shot myself. “ 

“ so drink. “ 

“ drink and be ill tonight. “ 

“ from the one you left behind. “ 

“ may the lines sag heavy and deep tonight. “

the last of the famous international playboys:

“ dear hero imprisoned: “ 

“ with all the new crimes that you are perfecting. “ 

“ I can’t help quoting you. “ 

“ everything that you said rings true. “ 

“ a murdering man, with a job to do. “ 

“ do you know my name ? “ 

“ don’t say you don’t, please say you do. “ 

“ I am the last of the famous international playboys. “ 

“ I never wanted to kill ! “ 

“ I am not naturally evil ! ” 

“ such things I do just to make myself more attractive to you, have I failed ? “ 

“ I’m in my cell, where I followed you. “

well I wonder:

“ well I wonder, do you hear me when you sleep ? “ 

“ I hoarsely cry. “ 

“ well I wonder, do you see me when we pass ? “ 

“ I have died. “ 

“ please keep me in mind. “ 

“ gasping, but somehow still alive. “ 

“ this is the fierce last stand of all I am. “ 

“ gasping, dying.” 

“ but somehow still alive. “ 

“ this is the final stand of all I am. “

barbarism begins at home:

“ unruly boys/girls/children who will not  up grow must be taken in hand. “ 

“ unruly girls/boys/children who will not settle down, they must be taken in hand. “ 

“ a crack on the head is what you get for not asking. “ 

“ a crack on the head is just what you get for asking. “ 

“ a crack on the head is just what you get. “ 

“ why ? because of who you are. “ 

“ why ? because of what you are. “ 

“ the things you say, the things you do. “

jack the ripper:

“ oh, you look so tired. “ 

“ mouth slack and wide. “ 

“ ill housed, and ill advised. “ 

“ your face is as mean as your life has been. “ 

“ crash into my arms. “ 

“ I want you. “ 

“ you don’t agree, but you don’t refuse. “ 

“ I know you. “ 

“ I know a place where no-one is likely to pass. “ 

“ you don’t care if it’s late. “ 

“ you don’t care if you’re lost. “ 

“ tonight, you’ve presumed too much. “ 

“ if it’s the last thing I ever do, I’m gonna get you. “

I don’t owe you anything:

“ you knew very well what was coming next. “ 

“ did I really walk all this way just to hear you say ‘I don’t want to go out tonight’ ? “ 

“ oh, but you will. “ 

“ for you must. “ 

“ I don’t owe you anything. “ 

“ you owe me something, repay me now. “ 

“ you should never go to them, let them come to you.” 

“ just like I do. “ 

“ too freely on your lips are words prematurely sad. “ 

“ I know what will make you smile tonight. “ 

“ life is never kind. “

the hand that rocks the cradle:

“ please don’t cry. “ 

“ my life down I shall lie. “ 

“ to tease, torment and tantalize. “ 

“ wavering shadows loom. “ 

“ a piano plays in an empty room. “ 

“ they’re’ll be blood on the cleaver tonight. “ 

“ when darkness lifts and the room is bright, i’ll still be by your side. “ 

“ you are all that matters and I’ll love you to the day I die. “ 

“ there never need be longing in your eyes. “ 

“ as long as the hand that rocks the cradle is mine. “ 

“ the sadness in your beautiful eyes. “ 

“ all too soon I did return, just like a moth to a flame. “ 

“ rattle my bones all over the stones. “ 

“ i’m only a beggar-man who nobody owns. “

still ill:

“ I decree today that life is simply taking and not giving. “ 

“ it owes me a living. “ 

“ ask me why and I’ll spit in your eye. “ 

“ we cannot cling to the old dreams anymore. “ 

“ not we cannot cling to those dreams. “ 

“ does the body rule the mind, or does the mind rule the body ? “ 

“ under the iron bridge we kissed. “ 

“ I ended up with sore lips. “ 

“ it just wasn’t like the old days anymore. “ 

“ no, It wasn’t like those days. “ 

“ am I still ill ? “ 

“ ask me why and I’ll die. “ 

“ if you must go to work tomorrow, well if I were you I wouldn’t bother. “ 

“ there are brighter sides to life, and I should know because I’ve seen them, but not very often. “

girlfriend in a coma:

“ girlfriend in a coma, I know it’s serious. “ 

“ there were times where I could have murdered her. “ 

“ I would hate anything to happen to her. “ 

“ there were times where I could have strangled her. “ 

“ do you really think she’ll pull through ? “ 

“ no, I don’t want to see her. “ 

“ would you please let me see her ? “

november spawned a monster:

“ sleep hard and dream of love. “ 

“ it’s the closest you will get to love. “ 

“ poor twisted child. “ 

“ hug me. “ 

“ one november spawned a monster in the shape of this child. “ 

“ who later cried. “ 

“ but jesus made me, so jesus save me from pity, sympathy, and people discussing me. “ 

“ a frame of useless limbs. “ 

“ what can make good of the bad that’s become ? “ 

“ when the lights are out, could you even bear to kiss her full on the mouth, or anywhere ? “ 

“ so ugly. “ 

“ november is a time that I must put out of my mind. “ 

i had a super SUPER productive morning and i was treating myself to the fancy shampoo (u know the shampoo u got as a gift that’s kinda expensive and v v Nice so u only use it when ur going out or have a social event going on?) and i came back to find a bunch of my mutuals reblogging the same post about hair, and i’ll be damned if i didn’t see that combination of events as some sort of sign! so here u go my dudes! another addition to the group! feel free to add “+ REVERSE” to switch the roles of this meme!

as always, DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST! i’ll add to it as time passes! and i really hope you all enjoy this one bc i had a lot of fun making it! 

[ WASH ]:          sender begins to wash the receiver’s hair.

[ TUG ]:          sender grabs the receiver’s hair and pulls at it. ( SPECIFY A REASON! CONTEXT IS KEY! )

[ BRAID ]:          sender, sitting behind the receiver’s back, begins to braid their hair.

[ SNIP ]:          having discussed the matter, the sender gives the receiver a haircut.

[ BACK ]:          sender, noticing a strand of hair fall from the receiver’s hairdo, carefully tucks the strand back behind the receiver’s ear.

[ BURY ]:          sender buries their hand deep in the receiver’s hair.

[ BRUSH ]:          with a hairbrush, comb, or their hand, the sender begins to gently brush the receiver’s hair.

[ GLIDE ]:          sender runs their fingers through the length of the receiver’s hair.

[ BLOOM ]:          sender weaves a number of flowers through the receiver’s hair.

[ STYLE ]:          sender begins to arrange the receiver’s hair into an elaborate hairstyle to an unspecified degree of success (or failure).

[ CROWN ]:          having created a flower crown, the sender carefully places it atop the receiver’s head.

[ INHALE ]:          while embracing or in close proximity to the receiver, the sender inhales slowly, smelling their hair in the process.

[ TICKLE ]:          the sender uses the ends of the receiver’s hair to playfully tickle them.

[ PLAY ]:          the sender begins to play with the receiver’s hair while the receiver lies in their lap.

[ LAY ]:           the sender lays down in the receiver’s lap to let them play with the sender’s hair.

[ TOUCH ]:           just for the sake of the contact, the sender reaches out and gently touches the strands of the receiver’s hair.

[ MASSAGE ]:          with their hands buried in the receiver’s hair, the sender begins to gently massage their scalp.

[ ROYAL ]:          as part of a coronation ceremony, the sender places a crown atop the receiver’s hair, maintaining eye contact as they do so.

[ KISS ]:          the sender places a tender kiss on the receiver’s hair.

[ AWAY ]:          the sender, using their fingertips, tenderly sweeps a few strands of hair out of the receiver’s face so as to see them more clearly.

[ TOWEL ]:          the sender uses a towel to carefully dry the receiver’s hair.

[ DRY ]:          the sender uses a hairdryer to dry the receiver’s hair.

personally ,   i’m  tired  of  the  secondhand  embarrassment.   so  here’s  a  random  assortment  of  nsfw  actions  and  dialogue  prompts  that  don’t  feel  too  over  the  top.   (  don’t  forget  to  add  [ reverse ]  if  you’d  like  to  see  the  receiver  perform  the  action.  )

actions.

[ PULL ]:  sender  pulls  receivers  hair.

[ HICKEY ]:  sender  gives  receiver  a  hickey.

[ TRAIL ]:  sender  leaves  a  trail  of  kisses  down  receivers  stomach.

[ HIPS ]:  sender  pulls  receiver  in  closer  by  the  hips.

[ KNEES ]:  sender  lowers  themselves  to  their  knees.

[ STRIPTEASE ]:  sender  teasingly  strips  their  clothes.

[ STRIP ]:  sender  undresses  sender.

[ GRIND ]:  sender  grinds  on  receivers  thigh.

[ ORAL ]:  sender  goes  down  on  receiver.

[ PASSENGER ]:  sender  touches  receiver  while  sender  is  driving.

[ DRIVER ]:  sender  goes  down  on  /  touches  receiver  while  receiver  is  driving.

[ OVERSTIMULATED ]:  sender  repeatedly  making  receiver  orgasm.

[ PUBLIC ]:  sender  and  receiver  have  sex  somewhere  public.

[ CAR ]:  sender  and  receiver  have  sex  in  a  car.

[ CONTROL ]:  sender  is  riding  receiver  and  receiver  takes  control  by  guiding  their  hips.

[ SHY ]:  sender  covers  their  face  and  receiver  moves  their  hands  away.

[ EYES ]:  sender  makes  receiver  look  them  in  the  eyes.

[ BEG ]:  sender  begs  receiver  to  touch  /  fuck  them.

[ MORNING ]:  sender  wakes  receiver  up  with  sex.

[ STRADDLE ]:  sender  sits  in  receivers  lap  to  tease  them.

[ CAMERA ]:  sender  records  receiver.

[ RECORD ]:  sender  is  recorded  by  receiver.

[ MOUTH ]:  sender  puts  their  fingers  into  receivers  mouth.

[ LOVE ]:  sender  tells  receiver  they  love  them  during.

[ PUSH ]:  sender  pushes  receiver  onto  bed.

dialogue.

“ you  look  so  pretty  like  this.  “

“ i  want  to  spend  all  night  learning  every  sound  you  make. “

“ let  me  take  care  of  you. “

“ i’m  not  wearing  any  underwear  right  now. “

“ you’re  really  good  at  that. “

“ god,  you’re  so  wet  /  hard  …. “

“ i  think  about  you  when  i  touch  myself. “

“ tell  me  what  you  want. “

“ please  touch  /  fuck  me. “

“ i  love  teasing  you. “

“ touch  yourself  for  me. “

“ i  get  so  wet  /  hard  around  you. “

“ get  on  your  knees. “

“ you’re  such  a  tease. “

“ tell  me  you’re  mine. “

“ i’m  yours. “

“ i  want  you  to  cum  for  me. “

“ i  want  you  to  cum  in  me. “

“ i’ll  be  good,  i  promise. “

“ you’re  doing  so  good  for  me. “

“ you  feel  so  good. “

“ you  sound  so  pretty  when  you  moan. “

“ i  could  be  your  toy. “

“ fuck  me  like  you  love  me. “

“ i’m  gonna  cum- “

“ i  just  want  to  feel  something. “

the  following  has  been  taken  from  the  2022  album  by  BAD  OMENS.  feel  free  to  change  and  adjust  anything  as  needed.

𝚃𝙷𝙴  𝙶𝚁𝙴𝚈.

“ even  the  scores  then  i  let  it  all  go  fall  apart. “

“ i’m  okay  with  the  past. “

“ but  i’m  afraid  of  what  i  might  say  if  you  ask. “

“ gave  you  way  too  many  chances ,  you  ran  through  them  all. “

“ got  everything  i  could  want  but  it  wasn’t  enough. “

“ nobody  left  for  me  to  talk  to ,  nobody  to  call. “

“ got  everything  i  could  want  but  i  still  wanted  more. “

“ i  still  wanted  more. “

“ there’s  not  another  way ,  don’t  let  me  go. “

“ don’t  dig  another  grave  today. “

“ i’ll  make  the  same  mistakes. “

“ i’ll  never  know  who  i  was  before  i  faded  away. “

“ lying  is  hard  and  the  truth  comes  out  anyway. “

“ you’re  going  way  too  far ,  gonna  drop  dead  at  this  rate. “

“ i  did  it  to  myself. “

“ i  tried  to  be  someone  else. “

“ i  let  it  tear  me  down  and  i’ll  never  be  the  same. “

“ you  didn’t  notice  ‘til  i  finally  got  away. “

𝚆𝙷𝙾  𝙰𝚁𝙴  𝚈𝙾𝚄 ?

” i  think  i’m  dreaming. “

“ take  off  all  of  your  clothes. “

“ hold  me  ‘til  we’re  frozen. “

“ hold  me  ‘til  we’re  frozen ,  ‘til  we  can’t  feel  it. “

“ i  asked  for  more  than  i  could  take ,  with  nothing  left  to  give. “

“ who  are  you ? “

“ everyday  it’s  all  the  same. “

“ i  don’t  wanna  play  your  games. “

“ if  you  wanna  know ,  it  depends  who’s  asking. “

“ you  said  we  got  nothing  in  common. “

“ you  said  we  got  nothing  in  common.  too  bad  we  never  even  got  started. “

“ i’ve  been  finally  catching  up  on  years  of  sleep  the  last  few  weeks. “

“ i’ve  been  finally  catching  up  on  years  of  sleep  the  last  few  weeks ,  patiently  falling  out  of  love  with  you  and  me. “

“ now  it’s  too  late  to  save  it. “

𝚂𝙾𝙼𝙴𝙱𝙾𝙳𝚈  𝙴𝙻𝚂𝙴.

“ you  said  enough. “

“ you  never  loved  the  thought  of  us. “

“ you’re  too  good  to  be  true. “

“ i  gotta  go ,  gotta  run. “

“ you  don’t  want  me  the  way  i  want  you. “

“ i  picked  you  up  when  you  fell. “

“ how  can  you  live  with  yourself ? “

“ you’re  lost  but  i  couldn’t  tell. “

“ fooled  me ,  and  you  did  it  well. “

“ thought  you  were  somebody  else. “

“ no  way  to  right  these  wrongs. “

“ i  know  that  i  can’t  resist. “

“ you  know  i  can’t  just  stop. “

“ i  know  we  said  sex  isn’t  love. “

“ i  know  we  said  sex  isn’t  love ,  but  it  seems  like  enough  for  us. “

“ i  know  we  said  that  we’re  having  fun. “

“ i  know  we  said  that  we’re  having  fun ,  but  i’m  getting  too  numb  to  your  touch. “

𝙸𝙳𝚆𝚃$.

” blend  in  with  the  madness. “

“ you  try  to  love  again ,  ‘cause  what  else  could  happen ? “

“ but  it  won’t  happen  again. “

“ i’m  not  gonna  pretend  i  don’t  want  the  money. “

“ can’t  say  i’m  mad ,  this  is  entertainment. “

“ i  want  what  they  have  and  i’m  gonna  take  it. “

“ i’m  so  sorry  if  i’m  cynical. “

“ my  waters  full  of  chemicals. “

“ i  don’t  know  what  i’m  made  of  anymore. “

“ i  want  it  all. “

𝚆𝙷𝙰𝚃  𝙳𝙾  𝚈𝙾𝚄  𝚆𝙰𝙽𝚃  𝙵𝚁𝙾𝙼  𝙼𝙴 ?

“ this  isn’t  over  ‘til  we  talk  in  the  light. “

“ said  i  was  sober  but  you  know  that  i  lied. “

“ i’ll  flip  it  over  with  you  and  me  inside. “

“ i  won’t  atone  for  debts  i  paid  for  in  full. “

“ i’ll  hang  up  my  shame  on  display  for  you. “

“ i’m  not  the  same. “

“ i’m  not  the  same  and  you  don’t  get  to  decide. “

“ you  don’t  get  to  decide  who  gets  replaced ,  who  gets  to  live  and  to  die. “

“ so  what  do  you  want  from  me ? “

“ what  do  you  want ? “

𝙰𝚁𝚃𝙸𝙵𝙸𝙲𝙰𝙻  𝚂𝚄𝙸𝙲𝙸𝙳𝙴.

” you  wanted  to  break  but  you  still  wanna  play  the  game. “

“ we’re  not  gonna  be  a  commodity. “

“ we’re  not  gonna  be  a  commodity ,  not  another  maggot  in  the  feed  that  you’re  gonna  eat. “

“ motherfucker ,  you  can  try. “

“ eye  for  an  eye ,  tooth  for  a  tooth. “

“ lighting  molotov's  for  the  broken  youth. “

“ can  you  hear  me  through  the  white  noise ? “

“ cheers  to  the  life  you  didn’t  get  to  choose. “

“ another  anti-christ  on  the  evening  news. “

“ you  hate  the  shape  when  you  have  to  see  an  unfamiliar  face  on  an  all  black  screen. “

“ repeat  the  phrase  they  force  you  to  read. “

“ if  i  wanna  be  great ,  i  don’t  wanna  be  me. “

“ can  you  hear  me ? “

𝙼𝙸𝚁𝙰𝙲𝙻𝙴.

“ one  look  at  your  eyes  and  i  cave  in. “

“ one  taste  of  the  life  now  i  crave  it. “

“ it’s  not  too  late  to  die  for  a  reason. “

“ i  wanted  to  dress  up  a  blade  in  red  with  both  of  our  necks. “

“ i  wasn’t  able ,  and  i  wasn’t  stable  i  guess. “

“ i’m  fucking  depressed. “

“ i’m  fucking  depressed.  i  hide  it  with  sex  and  drink  ‘til  it’s  fatal. “

“ it’s  so  fucking  painful. “

“ it’s  a  mess. “

“ give  me  something  beautiful. “

“ give  me  something  else. “

“ i  need  another  miracle. “

“ i  really  need  some  help. “

“ who’s  left  when  we’re  all  for  the  taking ? “

“ what  are  we  calling  it ? “

“ what  does  it  cost ? “

“ i  was  in  over  my  head  when  you  found  me. “

“ i  was  in  over  my  head  when  you  found  me ,  i  love  you  to  death  but  i’m  drowning. “

“ i  love  you  to  death  but  i’m  drowning. “

“ i  need  a  fucking  miracle. “

“ i  need  some  fucking  help. “

“ you’re  just  the  company  you  keep. “

“ you’re  just  the  company  you  keep  and  trouble  tends  to  follow  me. “

“ i  didn’t  care. “

“ i  didn’t  care  now  i’m  fucking  scared. “

❛ You can’t keep making excuses for every one of [name]’s insane whims. ❜

❛ Genius always looks like insanity at first, though, right? ❜

❛ Hey, please stop fire-spinning inside. ❜

❛ I say it like I see it, no filter. If people can’t handle it, that’s their problem. ❜

❛ You’ve got to stay off the Twitter. ❜

❛ Are you mocking me? ❜

❛ This can’t Shazam. It’s a lamp. ❜

❛ Where’s my speargun? I gotta pack. ❜

❛ He told me you haven’t left the bath for a week. ❜

❛ My mind is a fueled-up racing car, and I got nowhere to drive it. ❜

❛ I need danger, a hunt, a challenge. ❜

❛ There’s someone here for you! With a box! ❜

❛ Hello, stranger danger. ❜

❛ Excuse me, I love your accent. I had to try it. ❜

❛ You must be very special. ❜

❛ When you throw a murder mystery party, you do it right, buddy. ❜

❛ I’m not here. ❜

❛ He’s just staying here. He’s going through things. ❜

❛ This rich-people shit is weird. ❜

❛ This is stretching my stride-taking abilities. ❜

❛ Okay, let’s stop talking and actually start hanging out and having fun. ❜

❛ Why is it on the roof? ❜

❛ I wanted to ask, what are you doing here? ❜

❛ Is this part of the game? ❜

❛ I’ve learned through bitter experience that an anonymous invitation is not to be trifled with. ❜

❛ You really try. I like that. You really make an effort. ❜

❛ You never know when shit’s gonna go down. ❜

❛ I’m uncomfortable. I’m gonna go for a swim. ❜

❛ It’s true. I say it like I see it. ❜

❛ If you want to shake things up, you start with something small. ❜

❛ That’s the place where you have to look within yourself and ask, “Am I the kind of person who will keep going?” ❜

❛ That was some real red-pill stuff. ❜

❛ Every single one of you is holding on for dear life to [name]’s golden titties. ❜

❛ Wow. That was so real. ❜

❛ I’m a truth-teller. Some people can’t handle it. ❜

❛ It’s a dangerous thing to mistake speaking without thought for speaking the truth. Don’t you think? ❜

❛ Are you calling me dangerous? ❜

❛ A few cocktails before I’m murdered. ❜

❛ Halle Berry! That has a kick. ❜

❛ This simple thing that you thought you were looking at, it suddenly takes on layers and depth so complex, it gives you vertigo. ❜

❛ Every time we’ve gotten to the point where I’m going to strangle you, you pull something like this, and it’s magic. ❜

❛ I wanna be responsible for something that gets mentioned in the same breath as the Mona Lisa. ❜

❛ This is reckless. And you’re gonna get somebody killed. ❜

❛ It’s been a memorable weekend already, to be sure, but now the real fun starts. ❜

❛ Tonight, in this very room, a murder will be committed. ❜

❛ Well, to be clear, I mean, I didn’t know what a “blood diamond” was so… ❜

❛ What am I supposed to do now? Play Yahtzee all weekend? ❜

❛ I like the Glass Onion as a metaphor. An object that seems densely layered, but in reality the center is in plain sight. ❜

❛ It’s like putting a loaded gun on the table and turning off the lights! ❜

❛ Well, I’m out of here. Tomorrow morning. Gone. ❜

❛ You’re murdering my vibe. ❜

❛ So you come here, in your Gucci flats, telling us that we owe you? ❜

❛ What do you want? A check? You want performative pity? ❜

❛ I want the truth! ❜

❛ But me, I’m tired of pretending like you’re the victim in this game. ❜

❛ That changes things, right? ❜

❛ Have we ever not pulled through? Pulled it off? ❜

❛ We won’t know the cause of death without an autopsy. ❜

❛ Listen, I must insist that nobody touch the body or disturb anything around it. ❜

Are you treating this as a crime scene then? ❜

❛ I’ll pay you one billion dollars to tell me which one of them tried to kill me. ❜

❛ Oh, fiddlesticks. ❜

❛ Is that a speargun? ❜

❛ Oh, hell’s bells! Just, everybody, just stay here! ❜

❛ I can peel back the layers, I can take it to a point, but what lies at the center, only one person can tell us who killed [name]. ❜

❛ You’re not in the bath again, are you? ❜

❛ Heavens, the dog ate the caviar again. ❜

❛ It’s a stupid idea, right? ❜

❛ Listen, I want to be clear, huh? I am not Batman. ❜

❛ Any feelings of reverence or respect that you had for me when you crossed my threshold, buttress those feelings now. ❜

❛ Yeah, I’m trying real hard to buttress, but this sounds nuts. ❜

❛ Is this safe? ❜

❛ I shouldn’t be here. This is nuts. But I’m here. So let’s do this. ❜

❛ The reality-distortion field ends here. I can’t let you do this. ❜

❛ Look me in the eye! You know it’s a lie! ❜

❛ You must be really great at Clue, huh? ❜

❛ I’m very bad at dumb things. My Achilles’ heel. ❜

❛ This is your last chance to back out. ❜

❛ I think it’s really shitty what they all did to you. ❜

❛ I sold my soul for this. ❜

❛ I thought you said you didn’t drink? ❜

❛ That’s hard kombucha. That’s Jared Leto’s hard kombucha. ❜

❛ We’re running out of time! ❜

❛ Please. Think of the danger here. You gotta step back and let me handle this. ❜

❛ I never email anything that I wouldn’t want to see on the front page of The Times. ❜

❛ I think maybe you should take up drinking. You’re just killing it. ❜

❛ Something is just teasing the edge of my brain. ❜

❛ Oh, if I ever meet Jared Leto, I’m gonna whoop his kombucha-brewing ass. ❜

❛ My therapist says this is a toxic relationship. ❜

❛ We will do what we always do. Deny, half-apologize, and then go silent awhile. ❜

❛ Please tell me you did not think sweatshops are where they make sweatpants. ❜

❛ I will do whatever I have to do to save myself, and he is my only lifeline. ❜

❛ This never happens in Clue. ❜

❛ He’s a son of a bitch. Leave his ass. ❜

❛ I don’t feel sorry for him. He deserved what he got, and you are better off without him. ❜

❛ Please don’t kill me! Oh my God, please don’t kill me! ❜

❛ I’m not trying to kill you, you crazy bitch! ❜

❛ Shitballs! ❜

❛ It hides not behind complexity, but behind mind-numbing obvious clarity. ❜

❛ A veritable minefield of malapropisms and factual errors. ❜

❛ Oh, please. Just tell us who tried to kill me. ❜

❛ Nobody tried to kill you, you vainglorious buffoon. ❜

❛ What is reality?! ❜

❛ Does he keep a vial of poison in his tooth or something? Is that a rich person thing? ❜

❛ Oh, it’s so dumb, it’s brilliant. ❜

❛ No! It’s just dumb! ❜

❛ You dim-witted, brainless jackass! ❜

❛ Your one murder, with any panache at all, and you stole the whole idea from me. ❜

❛ Wow! We got some big accusations flying around here. ❜

❛ You need evidence, and you’ve got nothing. ❜

❛ Anywhere you go, it’s going to be your word against mine. How do you think that’s gonna go? ❜

❛ There’s nothing I can do. Except maybe offer you some courage. ❜

❛ I hope your little bitch tantrum gave you closure ’cause it accomplished nothing! ❜

❛ You’re ruined. ❜