Stancy Heaven

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1. “Steve is making Nancy uncomfortable by forcing himself onto her.”

Uh.. When? In s5, when Steve leans over her and their hands touch, Nancy doesn’t react negatively. She looks up at him, and it’s definitely not in disgust.

Nancy has never been a character to back down from a fight. She’s brave, loud, and a badass. Had she truly been uncomfortable, she would’ve moved away. She would’ve called Steve out or would’ve moved closer to her boyfriend. Instead, she shifts her weight and moves closer to him.

Also, Steve didn’t even mean anything by it. He’s not purposely trying to crowd her space or force himself onto her. He genuinely doesn’t know the effect he has on her. He’s pointing out something on the page, not maliciously trying to invade her personal space.

Once this happens, Jonathan shoots a look at them both. He doesn’t say anything because he SEES Nancy’s reaction. He silently acknowledges her lack of movement away from Steve. Had she been obviosuly uncomfortable, I think they both would’ve called him out for it.

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2. “Nancy is grossed out by Steve.”

This claim is just absurd to me.

Does NO ONE remember the boat scene? Steve stands up and takes his shirt off. And what does Nancy (WHOS DATING JONATHAN) do? She looks up at his back, fully ogling. I’ve seen people claim this was platonic, or her just simply looking up.

If that’s true, why does Robin look at her and smile??? The camera work is very intentional. Robin notices Nancy very obviously checking Steve out. There’s literally a youtube video with the title “Nancy and Max check Steve out”

Also, when she’s telling him to be careful, there’s no reason for that giant smile on her face.

Talking about Max, she uses the binoculars to check Steve out as well. The entire scene is literally just the two girls checking him out. If you deny this you’re genuinely delusional, I’m sorry.

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3. “There’s no tension or chemistry”

I guess the term ‘chemistry’ is opinion based (imo, Stancy has wonderful chemistry), but the tension cannot be argued against.

All of s4 is stocked FULL of tension between the two.

The bandage scene is my favorite scene between these two, for many reasons. We’ve seen characters bandage each other’s wounds, but they’re NEVER this full of sexual tension. Well… The Jancy one was in s1. Coincidence? I think not.

The scene is silent besides Steve’s heavy breathing and grunts. This feels purposeful and it really emphasizes the intimate nature of the scene.

Also, Nancy has no reason to be looking up at him like that. If this was animated her eyes would literally have stars in them.

After it’s done, she sits there and they just stare at each other. She could’ve gotten up right away but she doesn’t.

A few lines later, Nancy starts talking about the guns she has in her room. Steve says, “Yeah you almost shot me with that one.” Nancy smiles at him and says “Yeah, you almost deserved it.” Is this not banter? Weirdly flirty banter??

Then they sit there eye-fucking each other, which Eddie notices. He throws his jacket at Steve and says “for your modesty.” Both Robin AND Eddie are noticing.

Once the earthquake begins, Steve grabs Nancy and holds onto her. Once it’s over, you can see Nancy holding his arm against her in the background, way after it ended. Strange, isn’t it?

Seems like a ton of tension to me.

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4. “Nancy has no feelings for Steve.”

This may seem very similar to the other ones, but I'm going in order of scenes here, or at least trying to.

When Steve and Eddie are walking in the Upside Down, he gives that speech.

“But Wheeler, right there? She didn’t waste a second. Not one second. She just dove right in. Now, I don’t know what happened between you two, but if I were you? I would get her back. Because that was as unambiguous a sign of true love as these cynical eyes have ever seen.”

Eddie genuinely has no reason to say this. He’s not really Steve’s friend (before this conversation) nor is he his enemy. He’s not saying it to fuck with Steve’s head. He even says right before this that Steve’s a good dude and a badass. He obviously is starting to like Steve. So he has no reason to lie to him at all, or make up shit.

He says unambiguous. He straight up says it’s not open to interpretation.

Almost every single time a couple has gotten together, another person has pushed them into it. Here are some examples (including Jancy.)

- Jancy:

“I think you should tell him that (that Jonathan isn’t Nancy’s boyfriend) Only love makes you that crazy, sweetheart. And that damn stupid.”

“Okay, I'm confused. What’s going on here? Lovers quarrel?”

“No? You’re young, attractive, you’ve got chemistry, history, plus the real shit: Shared trauma.” (I’m going to get into this later…)

- Jopper:

“Move your lovers' quarrel somewhere else. Spare me!”

“CHILDREN CHILDREN CHILDREN! This interminable bickering was amusing at first but it’s getting very stale… So why don’t you two cut the horseshit and get to the part where you admit your sexual feelings for one another.”

Every time a character has pushed two characters together, they’ve gotten together.

And usually, Murray is right. But with s5, we see how his advice and his matchmaking is completely failing.

He tells Jonathan to PROPOSE to Nancy. This is insanely bad advice and will not fix anything. Murray and Jonathan’s motives are literally to prevent Steve from making a move on Nancy. Not because he loves her (which i’m not saying he doesn’t) but this is very obviously terrible motivation to propose.

People say Steve sees Nancy as property he has to win (he doesn’t) but is this not literally what Jonathan's doing?? Jonathan knows Steve loves Nancy, he knows Nancy has complicated feelings for Steve, so he thinks proposing will make sure he wins Nancy.

Also, are we forgetting the conversation at the end of S4? Nancy straight up tells Jonathan she’s glad he wasn’t there. Then, she corrects herself by saying she’s glad he was with Will and Mike. Which, okay, it’s still a weird thing to say to your boyfriend after a traumatic thing happened. I think she’s glad because of how close she and Steve got. If Jonathan was there, none of that would’ve happened.

Also, when Jonathan insults Steve, Nancy defends him: “He’s actually grown up quite a bit.” They’re exes. She has no reason to do this. But she does it because she’s realizing how much he’s changed, for the better.

Jonathan then gives her a weird look. He knows.

Then when he asks if they’re okay, she hesitates for an insanely long moment. Nothing really happened between them up till this moment. So why wouldn’t they be? BECAUSE SOMEONE ELSE IS ON HER MIND!!

Also.. why is Jonathan sleeping on the couch in the beginning of season 5? Everyone knows they’re dating. Why can’t he sleep in her bed??

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5. “Jancy isn’t trauma bonded.”

Murray says MULTIPLE times that they are. Back in season 2 he does. I quoted it above but i’ll quote it again.

“You’re young, attractive, you’ve got chemistry, history, plus the real shit: Shared trauma.”

If it isn’t obvious enough through all the superglue, he restates it in s5.

“The two of you were brought together by shared trauma in the first place.”

And you may be asking, why is being trauma bonded bad? I was unsure of this too, before I researched the term. So let me explain for those of you who don’t know.

According to google: “Trauma bonding is where intense but destructive emotional highs and lows replace healthy connection. This can lead to difficulty with trust and intimacy, emotional dysregulation, and a distorted sense of reality that makes it hard to leave the harmful dynamic. The bond is not based on love but on an intense cycle of pain and relief, leading to dependency on the relationship to feel complete.”

Steve and Nancy dated because they liked things about each other. According to Murray himself, by using the term “shared trauma,” Jancy got together because of pain, relief, and dependency.

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6. “Steve doesn’t understand what Nancy wants. He wants a trad wife.”

This is just untrue. Steve just wants a big family. He never had a normal family dynamic. He’s talked about how his parents are never home and how his mom doesn’t trust his cheating dad. Because of this, I’m tired of people saying wanting a big family is enforcing the patriarchy and misogynistic. It’s inherently not.

Nancy also never said she doesn’t want kids:

“I don’t think my parents ever loved each other. My mom was young, my dad was older. But he had a cushy job, money, and came from a good family. So they bought a nice house at the end of a cul-de-sac and started their nuclear family. Screw that.”

This is her saying she wants to follow her dreams, that she has aspirations. I think it’s inherently misogynistic to say that a mother can’t do these at the same time. It 100x makes it more difficult, and i’m not denying that, but nowhere in here does it say she doesn’t want kids. She just doesn’t want a loveless marriage.

People attribute this to her talking about Steve. Just because he’s rich doesn’t mean that’s true. Also, he’s obviously not depending on his families money if he works at a mall, film store, and a radio station, so i’m not sure where this idea came from.

Also, are we forgetting what Jonathan said in S4 Ep2 to Argyle (who, by the way, somehow has more sense than Jonathan)

“Because, if I told her the truth then she’d just throw her dreams out the window to come out here and be with me. And I just can’t take that. Like this huge knot of resentment would build, like some cancer, until eventually she hates me. And then before you know it, we’re just like my mom and dad. We’re divorced, and my kids hate me. Shit! It’s all shit! The cycle never ends!”

Is this not him admitting that their life would be exactly what Nancy doesn’t want?? It’s so hypocritical to say that Steve and Nancy’s future would be like this if Jonathan HIMSELF literally says it.

Also, Steve’s want for 6 kids doesn’t come from nowhere. His motivation isn’t to make his wife pump out as many children as he can. His dream stems directly from the kids. Since s2, he’s been forced to babysit the kids, which made him realize he wanted them himself. And how many kids are there? SIX!! (Will, Mike, Dustin, Lucas, Max, El) He even says in the RV with Nancy that he’s had practice. It doesn’t come from nowhere.

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7. The way people blatantly ignore every bad thing Jonathan has said/done.

I used to say I hate Jonathan, which I don’t think is accurate to how I feel. I don’t hate him, I just strongly dislike how people act like he’s an angel or better than Steve.

Let’s start with s1. Jancys HATE when people bring up the pictures but I'm going to because I feel that it’s important.

So, he was out in the woods, trying to find his brother when he came across the party. People say that he was so full emotions that it was an escape for him. Don’t you think that instead of stalking a group of teenagers he could’ve spent his time looking for Will? This is an invasive, insane waste of time that he knew Will probably didn’t have.

Then, once Nancy and Steve are inside, they share an extremely intimate moment. This is Nancy’s first sexual experience with anyone, and she feels comfortable enough around Steve. Yet Jonathan invades her privacy and takes pictures of her in her underwear.

How charming.

People hate on Steve for ‘bullying him’ which is utter BS to me.

He photographed Steve’s girlfriend in her bra. If Steve stole his camera and went through it, that would’ve been one thing (not sure why he would do this, but i’m just making a point) but Jonathan DEVELOPED the photos. What the hell was he planning to do with those pics?? I’m not saying he’s an irredeemable pervert, but come on.

He also tells Nancy that in the moment he took a picture of he saw Nancy being herself. And who was she with at that moment? STEVE!! She was sharing an intimate moment with Steve, and she felt safe, which even Jonathan states.

People also say that Jonathan apologized for the pictures. You know what else he said in his argument with Nancy?

“I just thought it was a good picture.”

He obviously feels no remorse.

Then, he insults the hell out of her, which people applaud him for. “I was thinking Nancy Wheeler, she’s not just another suburban girl who thinks she’s rebelling by doing exactly what every other suburban girl does, until that phase passes and they marry some boring one time jock who now works sales and they live out a perfectly boring little life at the end of a cul-de-sac, exactly like their parents.”

Again, this ties back to what he said in S4. He himself admitted this is the life they will have together.

This also came out of NOWHERE. She called him out on his bullshit for being a creep and assuming who she is but apparently Jonathan’s right and Nancy got ‘epicly roasted.’ Ok.

I think In S1+2 he was an amazing brother. I think he’s a great son. I do NOT, in any way, believe he’s a good boyfriend. In S3, his character went completely downhill, especially after his arguments with Nancy over their job.

I agree with the sentiment that Jonathan needs the job, and he needs to provide for his family, so I can understand why people like the complexity of this argument.

Still, what he’s saying to Nancy is terrible. He refuses to defend her even though there’s blatant misogyny in their workplace.

“What did you think? You’d make a star reporter in a month? That you’d crack the big case?”

This was not at all what she was doing. She was genuinely concerned. I would be too considering THERE'S INTER DIMENSIONAL MONSTERS IN HAWKINS. I don’t understand why past s1 people crucify other characters in the first few episodes when something strange happens.

Like, with Joyce’s magnets. No one believed her then, even after everything that she was fully right about in s1.

“Yeah, those assholes gave us jobs.”

Which Nancy counters by telling Jonathan how she felt humiliated by the men. She was basically their gopher. They didn’t let her do anything but get them lunch and coffee and then berate her when she got their orders wrong.

Then, just to add a fart on top of the shit cake, he says: “The real world sucks. Deal with it like the rest of us.”

If my boyfriend said that to me, we’d be done. What a terrible thing to say to your girlfriend who’s trying to tell you how your bosses dehumanized her.

Now, let’s go BACK to his argument with Argyle since there’s so much meat in this shit sandwhich.

After he tells Argyle he’s not going to college with Nancy, this is the conversation that follows:

“I can’t leave my mom and brother to.. to chase a dream that isn’t mine.”

Isn’t love about compromises?

Also, let’s link this back to something Steve says in S2.

“I’m just gonna end up working for my dad anyways. I don’t know, Nance. Is that such a bad thing? There’s insurance and benefits and all that adult stuff. And if I took it I could be around for your senior year. Just to look after you a little bit.”

It’s obvious Steve doesn’t want to take this job. The only positives he can think of are his insurance and benefits. He doesn’t want to, but he says he will so he’ll be close to Nancy.

Yet Jonathan can’t compromise, or even TELL Nancy so they can work through it together.

The conversation continues:

“What was I supposed to do?”

“Not lie!”

“Not lie?”

“Yeah!”

“What, so I just tell her the truth?”

“Yes!”

Jonathan’s acting like being honest with your significant other is some insane foreign concept. Even Argyle, who is the comedic relief for how stupid he is, tells Jonathan he needs to tell her the truth.

How does Argyle have more sense than Jonathan? It’s honestly embarrassing.

Then, Argyle asks: “What is your approach here? To just slow-motion break up with Nancy?”

And what does Jonathan say? “I guess.”

I can’t believe people claim he’s a good boyfriend. How is any part of this healthy?

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8. “Steve’s a slut shamer, homophobic, bully.”

Before I even begin to talk about this, I just want to throw this out there: YES, Steve in season 1 was kind of an asshole, but I truly believe it was because of the people he was hanging around.

Now, let’s talk about the first part of this: “Steve slut shames Nancy.”

It’s said in the show that Tommy and Carol did this, not Steve himself. And yes, he didn’t stop them. It was humiliating for Nancy and he never should have let them do it, but later, he apologizes and cleans it off the sign. No one forces him, no one tells him to. He does it himself.

And for people saying he bullied Jonathan, let me put this into perspective:

You and your girlfriend are doing pretty good, or so you think. One day, you catch a classmate printing pictures he took of your house, and your half naked girlfriend. So, of course, you defend her. Then, one day, you’re worried about her. So, you show up at her house. Once you’re there, you see that same classmate on her bed, with her wrapped in a towel.

What else are you supposed to think but ‘my girlfriend is cheating on me?’

Not saying that what he said about Jonathan’s family is okay, it’s just that he had every right to be angry. He could’ve talked to Nancy about it before letting his friends graffiti that, but she wouldn’t have told him the truth either way.

Also, he comes by his house to apologize! AND he buys him the camera Nancy gifted him. He didn’t even take the credit for it either.

People also say he’s homophobic because he called Jonathan a queer. There’s no defending this, and he shouldn’t have said this. But it’s just completely not true and people ignore his development.

Does no one remember the scene with him and Robin?

She comes out to him. It takes him a second to understand. Robin begins to panic, worried Steve is going to hate her.

Instead, he makes a joke. He accepts her right then and there, and they laugh together.

People claim that because he didn’t outright say “I accept you, Robin” that he’s homophobic. This is utter bullshit.

In season 4, we see him convincing Robin to talk to her crush. He says that it’s normal for people to like boobs, because well, they’re boobs. He’s pushing Robin to go for the girl she obviously is crushing on.

He’s accepting her, he’s even helping her. Steve is Robin's biggest supporter and wingman, and to say otherwise is mental.

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9. “Stancys only like Steve because he’s attractive, rich, white, and popular.”

This is an insane claim and it seems like people are trying to seem like they’re serving justice to racists who only care about rich white men.

Before I talk about WHY I love Steve, and why he’s my favorite character, let me debunk these claims.

First, I’d be lying if I said I don’t think Joe Keery is insanely attractive. But to diminish his entire character just because of the way he looks is ridiculous.

Second, I said this before, Steve isn’t relying on his family's money. We know he’s not close with his parents. If he was truly a spoiled trust fund kid, why would he be working these bottom of the barrel jobs? If I were rich, personally, I wouldn't want to wear that embarrassing uniform or work in customer service.

To say he understands Jonathan’s struggles with poverty is wrong, and I’m not saying that in any way. I’m simply saying that he’s not a spoiled rich kid living off of daddy’s money. He’s always employed.

Third, his race has nothing to do with anything. Jonathan is white too, so I’m not sure why this is even an argument. If Jonathan were a person of color, and Steve was a terrible person, I could understand this argument, but neither are true.

Last, Steve was only popular until s2. The point of the show is to reevaluate what it means to be an outcast. Steve was known as the king of hawkins, but as soon as he graduated, he also became an outcast.

Remember when he was trying to flirt with those girls and they laughed in his face? Yeah, obviously not something they’d do if he were popular.

The characters think Steve peaked in high school, which ultimately makes him a loser. Yes, Steve Harrington, past season 2, is an outcast.

Now, let’s move onto why Steve is my favorite character.

- His development

Steve has had some of THE BEST character development in the show. I’m sure many people know this already, since it trended a lot in 2022, but Steve was originally supposed to die. The duffers had him written as a stereotypical jock douche who would have no impact on the rest of the show.

Except, Joe Keery gave him such depth that the Duffers developed his character to be more than just your run of the mill ass hole.

- His relationship with the kids

It’s literally a fandom wide joke that he’s the babysitter. He even says it in the show.

His relationship with Dustin is by far the best non-romantic duo in the entire show. They seem like vastly different people, but they found each other in a time of need, and they both helped each other grow.

Dustin was down about Max, and Steve, who could’ve just written him off as some weirdo middle schooler, gave him advice. He acted like a brother figure to him. This gives Dustin the male connection he needed. He doesn’t have a father, he’s an only child, and he even thinks he’s not Mike's best friend, since he said it in season 1.

In S2, he protects all the children when Billy comes to the house, he goes outside and beats a ton of blood thirsty demodogs with a bat for them, and much more.

He risks his life countless times to save the kids, without any second thoughts

- He’s a badass???

This might seem like a lame reason but it’s true. I can’t name a single time Jonathan has done anything remotely close to what Steve has done.

He dove in a lake, bit a bat in half (hot), beat a demogorgon with a bat (to protect his girlfriend who he thought cheated on him by the way), and countless other times risked his life for the group and the children.

He doesn’t back down, and he’ll do anything for the group, which just shows how much he cares.

- His relationship with Robin.

I already talked about this, so I'll keep it short. I love their dynamic and how much he supports her.

I have a ton more, but I'm going to talk about it in the next few sections.

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10. “Steve needs to let go and accept Nancy is with Jonathan. He’s so obsessed with a relationship from highschool.”

He did accept it. Does no one remember that scene when they’re looking for heaters? He tells her to go with Jonathan, and that it’s okay. He even says he was a shitty boyfriend.

People keep saying that he’s forcing himself onto her and he has to let Jonathan be her boyfriend, which he literally does. Yeah, he was competing with Jonathan and trying to impress Nancy (I'm also going to touch on this deeper), but once Jonathan and Nancy reunite, Steve stands back.

He allows Jonathan to comfort her, he doesn’t try to get to Nancy first. He keeps boundaries and he knows it’s not his job to comfort her, although he wants to.

People say the scene in the woods where he tells her about his dream is ‘creepy’ and overstepping, which I fully disagree with. He’s not telling her to break up with Jonathan. He’s not begging her to take him back.

It’s a life or death situation, he doesn’t know if he’ll make it. So, in case anything does happen, he tells her how he feels. He wants to be open and honest with her. (Unlike her own boyfriend.)

Also, people saying that he should get over it because it’s a highschool relationship are just pulling stuff out of their asses. He loved her. She broke his heart. Of course he’s still hung up on her. It’s not like he’s 30 years old, still hanging on to a 15 year old relationship. He’s 19, technically still a teenager. It’s not a crime to love someone that deeply.

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11. “Jonathan was right in the car.”

No.. No he wasn’t.

While they’re in the car, Steve suggests maybe going to the hospital to get flowers for Nancy.

Flowers may be a little much, but at the same time, i understand why he said this. People are crucifying him and saying it’s some ploy to get her back, which it obviously isn’t.

She went down a shame spiral in s2, which is why they broke up in the first place. Steve doesn’t want her to go through that again.

People are also saying Nancy wouldn’t want that. Says who?

Why would she not want her boyfriend there to comfort her when her parents are in the hospital?? Just because she’s a total badass and can take care of herself doesn’t mean she doesn’t need support. This way of thinking is just so sideways.

Jonathan also tells Steve that ever since he got back from Cali, Steve has been trying to impress Nancy. The only time we saw this happen was when JONATHAN started it!!

Steve is known to be the one doing all the dangerous shit. Of course he steps up and says he’s going to do it. He doesn’t even look at Nancy or Robin while saying this. Then, Mr. Insecure himself steps up and says it’s more of a job for him.

Which.. it isn’t?

Sure, Steve then races up the tower against Jonathan, but only because he started it. He’s obviously insanely insecure BECAUSE he knows Nancy might still have feelings for Steve.

Steve completely clocked Jonathan by telling him Nancy is miserable and Jonathan needs to focus less on Steve, and more on working on the relationship.

He obviously feels inferior to Steve and instead of working through this, he attacks him for no reason. He also insults him multiple times, even after Steve had a good plan.

It’s just astounding to me that people are on Jonathan’s side in this.

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