fluffy's Frivolous Fancies

Since I last logged in and longer since I cared about anything on here. I'm not some transient thing, though, and don't abandon even the most derelict crevices of the internet over which my shadow has been rumored to loom.

I don't remember what acrid cognitive lapse deposits me upon the threshold of your realm, with which the likes of grammar have naught been acquainted, so I shall take my leave in horror of the three posts I foolishly allowed to stir my confusion and disgust.

I kind of just let it do its thing. I occasionally use it as a blog where I write things I think. I occasionally will scroll through my dashboard to see if there’s anything funny. I repost a few things and if I get a new follower or someone likes something I did—both tremendously rare—I’ll check out their blog and like/repost anything I… like.

Tumblr is a strange place, not much is straight forward. Like writing things in tags. The internet I’m from doesn’t interact this way and I’ve had a hard time pretending to be as… adjective as everyone else here. I don’t even know which adjective to use, just kind of pick your own and maybe you know what I’m trying to say.

I mostly either use my custom dashboard which I wrote to make things lazier for me or use the app on my tablet which is where I post from. Well, except for right now. I decided to check out the “real” dashboard, and compare now to back when I first started here. I’ve been blocked by people. Kind of surprising in that I don’t really know why and these are people that seemed to… I don’t know, be of like mind? I find the silent ignore the least helpful and the “what is wrong with you?” responses to be at most kind of telling about what a specific person might find offensive.

Then we have deactivated accounts or changed names. I don’t recognize all my followers or the people I follow. Some things I find straight confusing. People I talked to now gone, conversations I recognize with names I don’t. Tumblr is a part of my world predominated by transient players and opinions that I haven’t shared in some time.

But then we have what keeps me coming back. The monotony. I enjoy the routine and predictable nature of this place. Nothing’s ever unexpected, I can always rely on Tumblr to be the same rehash. Like playing a game you love for the ten-thousandth time, you know the board and just have to jump at the right time. I’m no good at the game but it’s the comfort in knowing where each enemy is and where to jump. I don’t have to relearn everything if I don’t come around for a few months.

The world sure is a big place. I sometimes contemplate the world as if it were non-hazardous, such that we could wander aimlessly and never worry, and the people that inhabit our world if we all suddenly stopped being sentient and without aggression or instinct began to roam the world.

I think about how people would scatter, the nooks and crannies of the world dotted with former humans, people lining the shores staring out into the vast oceans unable to wonder about the nature of the seemingly endless field of water. I think of people staring at trees up close, no mind to be blank as squirrels clamber up and inspect the strange beings that wander harmlessly through the forest. I think about cars absorbed by rust and the overly green leaves of ivy overtaking relics with people still inside no longer able to manipulate what may as well be an infinitely complex handle mechanism.

As I think about these things I think about what mattered to these people before, when they had sentience and what they did with it. How does this tranquil life compare to how they lived before? Given the choice how would they prefer they world? Themselves? Is this something for which they may have longed? Would they see more of the world or less? Given our current levels and advancements in technology would they become closer to nature or even venture farther than if they had retained their sentience?

I think about animals rendered benign by the axioms of this hypothetical world and how they would treat the population of puppets roaming the wilds. I imagine large animals, bears and such, inspecting the people with curiosity and playfulness. I imagine small animals, rodents and the like, considering the people part of the landscape and treating them with indifference. I imagine animals that are even now friendly towards us, our cats and dogs, looking after us and living their own lives only checking in on their former owners out of habit as if to anchor themselves to the ever changing world that turned alien to them when we went blank.