Insomniac/Writer

1) When you host a gathering, you have a duty of care to your guests. You have a legal duty of care to keep them reasonably safe, and you have a social duty of care to help them be reasonably comfortable. So try to greet each guest as they arrive, remember their name and something interesting about them, and --> introduce them by name to someone else at the party who might find that thing interesting too.<-- Sample script: “Bill, I want you to meet Emma. She is restoring a ‘65 Barracuda, similar to the one you restored.” After your guests are mostly finished arriving, keep an eye on your guests and when one is backed into a corner behind the potted palm looking miserable, go fetch them and introduce them to someone else. Sample script: “Oh, Phyllis, there you are! Have you met Toby yet? Toby! You should really tell Phyllis about your pet tortoise!” 2) When you are a guest and you get buttonholed in this way, help out your host by at least pretending to be interested in ‘65 Barracudas or pet tortoises, and asking the other guest something. Ask them anything. Or if you see the guy moping behind the potted palm before your host does, approach them and ask them something. The key is, use the words “what” or “where” or “how” to ask the question, rather than “do/did ...?” That way they cannot simply, desperately, answer “yes” or “no” and have to tell you something you can build on. And don’t worry about “not wanting to pry”. People tend to really like to talk about themselves, provided you give them leeway to decide what part of themselves to talk about. Sample script: “Lucky you! How did you manage to get your hands on a ‘65 Barracuda/pet tortoise?” Or if you didn’t get a prompt from your busy host, “What canapés are the tastiest?” or the old standbys Sample script: “what school do you go to/what are you studying/what do you do in your spare time when you’re not at a cocktail party?”

Son: there’s always a librarian. Just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they aren’t there. And it’s a garden, there has to be someone taking care of it or it isn’t really a garden.

Me:

Son: any librarian who hoards a library to themselves is hiding something.

Daughter: /nods seriously/

Son: wouldn’t be a secret library. I have nothing to hide.

Daughter: so not a secret librarian. A good librarian.

Zuko really believed that Ty Lee didn’t understand who he was at all. He completely bought into the act that she’s just a puppet for Azula, who lives in her “little Ty Lee world where everything’s great all the time”. But the thing is, Ty Lee is one of the most perceptive characters in the show, and she’s excellent at keeping that on the down low, but she sees a lot more of Zuko than he thinks, and a lot of what she sees is very familiar to her.

Overshadowed by prodigious siblings?

Wanting to be acknowledged for the talents you have rather than the talents you don’t?

Kept in line by fear?

Spending your whole life bending over backwards to fit the persona the royal family has set for you?

Azula used blatant intimidation tactics to get Ty Lee to comply, ordering the net to be set on fire and all the animals released (which, for the record, would not only have endangered Ty Lee but the circus creatures themselves–I bet Ty Lee was attached to them, and that would’ve been a double threat in itself). Ty Lee is visibly terrified, but instead of calling her out or letting Azula see that she was intimidated, she says this:

Instead of endangering herself by pointing out that Azula crossed a line, Ty Lee falls back on her talk of “the universe” and “auras,” talk that canonically gets her indulged or dismissed but never taken seriously. 

She knows that Azula’s dangerous. There’s no way she doesn’t know that Azula is threatening her. But if she can keep Azula from realizing she knows that, she’s a little safer. 

Because she’s one of maybe two people Azula never considered as potential enemies–even (especially, but that’s another thread) Ozai is a threat in her mind, but Mai and Ty Lee are the closest thing Azula has to trusted friends, right up until their betrayal. 

Ty Lee’s spent a lifetime cultivating a personality that not only allows her to stands out among her siblings–it protects her from being treated as a threat. When you’re friends with Azula, that is an essential facade to maintain.  and she does it consistently enough that no one ever sees through it.

Azula gets jealous of the male attention that Ty Lee is getting. It’s not the same as being a threat, but it does put Ty Lee in a dangerous position because she has something Azula wants. It doesn’t take much for Azula to turn dangerous and threatening when there’s something she wants and perceives an obstacle in the way, and Ty Lee knows this. And with just a few words, a compliment to Azula, she sets her at ease and makes herself seem vapid (“just laugh at whatever they say even if it’s not funny”) while giving advice. Which means Azula can take or leave her advice but won’t perceive Ty Lee as a real threat to the attention she craves because Ty Lee is getting attention for “being vapid” and not because she’s naturally beautiful and charming.