Shit. This dude knows an extreme amount about a niche subject. Crazy what you can accomplish when you have treatment resistant IBS

I want it on record that I shit mostly normal.

med people are so annoying "This family's 8 year old child who was about to go through a major surgery and kept crying that she was hungry so they pitied her and gave her food, she then had a heart attack in the surgery. They're so stupid 😒" girl they didn't know that could happen or why it happens. it takes so little time to explain to them that will happen instead of telling them "no food" with no explanation 10 times

"Before surgery, your body’s reflexes that protect your airway are relaxed by anesthesia. If there’s food or liquid in your stomach, it will near certainly come back up and go into your lungs, which can cause choking, a severe lung / heart infection or even a heart attack. That’s called aspiration, and it is life-threatening. It's hard, but it's only a single day to prevent near certain death. Not eating or drinking beforehand massively lowers the risk and helps prevent these life threatening situations under anesthesia." <- TIP: patients have brains which allows them to receive information just like you

Reblogging to save a life and teach medical professionals basic communication skills

supermarkets should have benches

everywhere should have benches

the more you listen to it, the funnier it gets

Audio: dramatic piano. The husky screams along, vaguely keeping the rhythm but not the tune

That last ROO always gets me

told my parents i miss archaeology and my mom was, very sympathetically, like: “do you want to dig holes in the garden?” and i was like. yes. i want to dig holes in the garden.

These are both moods, but unfortunately I am primarily a bioarchaeologist. (IE, I specialize in digging up old human skeletons.) And, uh, home-made bioarchaeology is tragically discriminated against by law enforcement.

Only if you get caught

This whole post took an unexpected turn

Out of work paleontologists can take a page out of the Girl Scouts handbook and eat a chicken, clean the bones, encase them in a mud and plaster mix, then chip it back out. Which is legitimately how Girl Scouts earn their paleontology badge.

… I rebuilt my chicken by modeling muscles back onto the bones using clay, then putting skin on it and making it look like a dinosaur…. 

Perfect. Exactly the right way to add a part 2 to this project.

enrichment

How do I explain Plato’s allegory of the cave to quarantined archeologists?

::wheeze::

a trap song with the rapper growing increasingly concerned about all the gun sound effects in the music 

[image ID: ‘#every time one plays an instrument stops working’. end ID]

I'm thinking of Symphony of the Sixth Blast Furnace by Evgeny Sedukhin again...

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

ohhhh shit. target is recalling their up & up baby wipes (fragrance free & fresh cucumber scented) because they're contaminated with Burkholderia cepacia complex and Burkholderia gladioli, multiple people are reporting discoloration & infections. i just got a call about it cuz i had purchased those but i've already gone through them 😅 so no refund for me. but im fine. if you have these they're saying you need to immediately stop using them and bring them back to target for a full refund. this bacteria can cause life threatening infections in children/infants and people with compromises immune systems (ESPECIALLY cystic fibrosis!!) and i know lots of other chronically ill people follow me!!!!