sympathy for the devil // the rolling stones
I watched with glee while your kings and queens fought for ten decades for the gods they made
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@flipperedoff
sympathy for the devil // the rolling stones
I watched with glee while your kings and queens fought for ten decades for the gods they made

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Penn Badgley photographed by Kurt Iswarienko for Bullett Magazine (2010)
Omgđąđąđ

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STANDBY.
       ââ   c o n v e r t i n g  .  .  .
â°Â  feat. @hcnnnas !  â°
â so i talked to mom today and she said i should shy away from adopting a chinchilla. â lev sipped his latte, proceeding with a scowl.  â i asked her on what frigginâ grounds. wanna know what she said? she goes, â itâs nothing personal, honey, but you should start with a houseplant. â  i mean -- really? a houseplant? â it was appalling that the goodman matriarch didnât buy into his capacity to care for an adorably neurotic rodent. sure, lev had what one might call a... questionable... track record. in second grade, heâd accidentally thrown his classâs pet lizard, jorge, into the dryer -- it was a hot mess.  â i think iâd make an excellent chinchilla dad. picture it, han! let me set the scene. itâs a thursday night, i get home from work and the sunâs just about rising. iâm sipping some bomb ass kombucha wearing these bad boys -- â lev gestured to the shades currently propped on his head. â and orville -- thatâs what iâll name him -- has a matching pair. me and my lilâ dude, looking fly as heck. just chinchillinâ like villains. what dâyou think? â
â°Â  feat. @duvcls ! â°
upon spotting eric in the hallway, lev swooped in beside him, executing a smooth greeting -- that is, of course, if one elected to ignore how he nearly tripped over his feet to close the distance. â dude. eric. whaddup? lemme tell you whatâs good. yeah? because itâs... wow, itâs really fuckinâ good. alright. so i was on my 4am stroll through dollar tree last night and i had a revelation, right? you with me? â lev slung his right arm around ericâs shoulders as if it might aid his friend in partaking in his vision. â what says â hey sky, youâre my wife and i worship the ground you walk on â more than one of these? â  a lift of his left arm revealed a stuffed baby sloth secured around his wrist with magnetic paws.  â i snagged it for you -- no need to thank me. just like... save it for a date. or a frigginâ, like... zenith prom or something! and then wham bam diggity damn, you whip this bad baby out. a cuddly corsage! a cudsage ! â he paused, tilting his head to admire the tune of this brilliant idea.  â yeah, i think i just hacked your marriage. no biggie. â
have you ever farted and then blamed someone else?
â oh, wouldnât you like to know⌠â

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favorite mid morning snack?
â you know what snack is killer and totally underrated? baby carrots. who doesnât like a good mid morning baby carrot? or like⌠maybe several. âcause theyâre, yâknow. babies. â
John Mulaney is hosting SNL, and they just did a lobster-themed âLes MisĂŠrablesâ parodyâŚ. the world is a beautiful place.

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â° feat. @avakxnt ! â°
in theory, stealing from final destinationâs props closet was a terrible idea to begin with. but lev goodman prided himself on believing in everyone -- and every thingâs -- potential to improve. it just so happened that this situationâs prognosis wasnât prone to an upswing. the likelihood of getting off scot free grew slimmer and slimmer the more time he wasted trying to cover his tracks. just as he placed the last prop back on top of the pile heâd disrupted, the whole thing came tumbling down. â gah -- jesus -- â  lev shielded himself from the miniature avalanche, swatting at falling items with the bat currently in his grasp. â fuckinâ real-life fruit ninja, â he mumbled to himself with a sigh, once everything had hit the ground. rather than try to reset everything again, the comedian figured he should opt for a swift exit. just as he exited into the hall and pivoted on his heels to return to thatâs so random!âs set, he nearly slammed into a wall. no! a person! he staggered back, half-heartedly wielding the bat as some type of makeshift barrier. lev eestablished his stance to keep from revealing how spooked heâd actually been.  â shit, hello! hi! nothing to see here. â especially with his freakinâ eyes waiting to adjust to the brighter light out here.  â this bat is like... mine. from home. yâknow? an official personal possession. yup. â  he blinked several times in quick succession, prompting his eyes to get with the program. â so sorry for like, causing hall traffic. iâm just gonna... take my personal artifact and head on out, if thatâs good with you? â
Joe Keery for GQ photographed by Aaron Feaver