Dark Star

People think I’m named after the character from Harry Potter, but honesty do I look young enough for people to think that? Good idea, don’t get any boats. 

Bit too old for that... No one gets my name. They just think my mom liked rocks.

Yeah; those who are preoccupied with T-Rex dick and those who a preoccupied with bed.

You see right through me.

I like to cook, so breakfast isn’t a issue. Usually I don’t hang around for coffee

I don't, but I do anyway... But I'm a coffee addict... And I definitely deserve coffee.

I cannot believe that without proof. You don’t even look like you could take candy from a baby.

How do you think I get away with it?

Only until recently? Do you mind if I ask… Because, I mean, I’m sure my boss wouldn’t mind letting you come in to help out from time to time if you really wanted. Or needed a bit of extra cash, I suppose.

As much as I need the money I know fate isn't nice enough for that opportunity to be anywhere near me.

good point, I shouldn’t have put it like that Im just in a shit mood

Well that much is clear. Most people don't bleach their veins for fun. Who you mad at?

Im so sick of people right now, to think, I was stupid enough to assume people grow the fuck up realise that being gay isnt an issue. Ugh I want to inset bleach to my veins, it takes a lot to get me pissed of but fuck did this do it

Well that ain't gonna help shit. You gotta go put it in other people's veins. 

I was named after my great-grandmother’s favorite flower. Alcoholic pirate? Don’t follow his footsteps. 

Hmm. Not a bad name at all. Ahh, I could never do that. I don't have a boat.

Or trying to make a bed.

Oh me too buddy. Who knew we’d feel so connected to a dinosaur.

I've known. I may not look like it but I can get pretty ferocious. 

Always happy to help. I'm Flint.

What, and you think I’d like to? Everybody knows: no hands, no fun.

Yeah, what else is there to tie up? Kidding. 

Nah, I work at a bakery so the worse I’ll get is a lecture about getting flour on the keys.

Bakery huh? Worked in one of those until recently. I always smelled like cake. I miss it.

True; I clocked chino cut-offs and navy croc sandals. If anything here is a crime against nature, it certainly aint me.

No idea what the first thing is but crocs are the only true work of evil.

Getting murdered is definitely a big no. The pub’s a big winner, except everyone in once a while you’ll get some beer gut guy who won’t take no for an answer. Sorry, if your dick smells like a cheap brew and smoke I’m off it. 

Well your standards are higher than mine, I'm afraid. I just require coffee in the morning. I'm a simple soul.

       A minute of silence for those poor dinosaurs.

I hope they were reincarnated into 80s rockstars. That'd make up for the lack of booty.