Android dreams of electric gender

the wisdom ive learnt is that becoming part of a friend group 1) takes a long time and 2) involves a lot of feeling awkward and left out at first. there’s nothing terrible about this but if you grew up chronically lonely or have any kind of trauma relating to social isolation this likely feels Really Wrong and activates danger signals. but both fortunately and unfortunately it’s just how becoming close to new people works most of the time

another thing that was not intuitive to me as someone who grew up an autistic loner: basically everyone on the planet is starved for connection all the time and almost everything people do is an attempt to reach out to another. most seemingly illogical interactions and behaviours can be explained by this. you have to take as many of these invitations as you can. even if you're wrong you still attempted to bring more warmth into the world

Remember to kill everything in your way today no hesitation

17th century european philosophers are so funny, they’ll be like “my aim herein is to discourse upon the nature of that which we call ‘civilization,’ and more generally that which we call ‘civil.’ the finger, as all can perceive, is a certain gland growing from the tissue of the arm, which, when acted upon by the electrical motion of the soul, doth exhibit such selfsame actions as does the worm; and therefore we may surmise that the worm is made of the same substance as the finger, or rather the finger the worm” and they just go on talking about fingers in a deeply incorrect but worryingly rational way for another 20 pages

like the betrayal’s always going to be worse if they cared about you and it didn’t matter. someone discards you because they didn’t give a shit, then you can be angry about that, you can feel vindicated in that, you can get over it. but if they can look you in the eyes and say “I love you. I would make the same choice again.” You will never sleep peacefully again, is all.

The four most interesting parts of time loop are when the person kills themselves for the first time, when they kill someone else for the first time (in a fuck around kind of way, this doesn't count if they already were killing people outside of the loop), how they break the loop, and the weeks afterward where they loose their fucking minds in an entirely different, significantly more damaging to the world around them way. And yet I rarely see anything done with that last one. People leave time loops and are all happy go lucky 'oh boy'. Where's the grappling with people you know who will never know you? Where's the knowledge that the safety of the loop is gone, and you can't fix any mistakes you make? That's the good angst I want

by the fourth or fifth time you "come back wrong" no ones even impressed anymore

“this character did not act in the most objectively logical way possible!” is not ! actually valid literary criticism

some of the best characters are the ones where you know if they sat down and discussed ghosts the conversation would end with them attacking each other with furniture

You misused thou/thee in a joke post and provoked my ire.

I'm about to have the most stressful 6 days of my entire life. wish me luck

wednesday night….the thinking man’s friday

the conversation was pleasant enough and we both had a nice chuckle but i saw you reload a save right before it. what did you do to me? what did you do?