Lair of Lies and Lollipops

A comic for english class, we had to make a one page comic about a queer theme, so I made something about the struggle of getting dressed when you don’t know how you want to be perceived :’) (I wish we could just go outside naked, it would save me a lot of time in the morning)

You don't have to come out if you are not safe.

You don't have to come out to be LGBTQ+

If you identify as LGBTQ+ you are LGBTQ+ whether people know or not.

Do what is best for you.

Tried this again- washing hands, entering, exiting, and using restroom stalls.

I’ve done this experiment prior to Covid-19 and in it I found that it was far more dangerous and confrontational to enter the women’s restroom in gender nonconformity. People hit, shouted, and even had me dragged out. However in a new 2022 study of over 75 binary bathrooms tested (in london area) things were noticeably shifted. I was stopped and confronted about an equal number of times in both restrooms. People in the mens room were more likely to get security involved than before. People in the womens room were more likely to accept that I was allowed to be in there if I explained. But people in the mens room were more likely to demand proof of some kind. Such as an ID or even use of urinals. Overall both were unsafe feeling at times. But to the credit- I felt safer in the womens room than the mens for the majority of the time (and for the first time since doing these experiments). Although in the womens room I have always felt a huge amount of empathy or guilt whenever my natural aesthetic scares someone because I know that fear is rooted in trauma which is valid. But yet- if I have to use the bathroom on my “birth certificate” then this is what a “woman’s room attendee looks like”. Even in a dress I can get reported in the “womens room” often as a product of transphobia when people assume I’m a transwoman. Typically my encounters, even if I’m hit by someone, lead to me holding them in their trauma and telling them it will be ok. That weighs a lot on my conscience sometimes- creating that amount of disturbance and anguish just by existing. We still have a long way to go to create safe places for people just to relieve themselves. But for my safety for now- if I just want to feel the safest and don’t have capacity to educate- I’ll be using the mens room in a collared shirt or jacket. That seems the safest combo.

Eve, 1912, Raphael Kirchner

Mount Sinai, 1570, El Greco

Picture of Ōmori Hikoshichi Encountering a Demon on his Path, Tsukioka Yoshitoshi, May 1889, Minneapolis Institute of Art: Japanese and Korean Art

man wearing black and white cap, short blue kimono with white swirling patterns and red garment on top, wading through water; woman wearing white garment with multicolored floral medallions clinging to man’s back; moon in sky at top center Size: 14 ½ × 9 15/16 in. (36.83 × 25.24 cm) (sheet, Vertical ōban) Medium: Woodblock print (nishiki-e); ink and color on paper

“Medical professional having to deal with an unruly patient trying to take off their mask”