Chick fil A Wants Me Dead

i love noctis lucis caelum. his friend is like 'hey introduce yourself to this random woman i met. she likes nature' and he's like 'sounds legit' and immediately agrees to capture frogs for her five seconds later with no apparent reward. only after spending all day catching the frogs he's like 'oh you research science? that's why you need frogs?' like you could literally ask the crown prince of lucis to do the most insane random errand and he will do so with no questions asked. prince of my heart

Boobs should be Velcro and I can take them off and put them back on when I really need. You know?

disabled ppl we need to start lying to nosy people okay? you tell me i'm too young to need a cane and i will tell you point blank that maybe you should tell that to the guy who ran me over. you don't get an explanation of my health issues you get lies and depending on how much of an asshole i want to be that lie will be anything from a humble car crash to a 1 billion lions attack. mind yr business.

jerking off isnt working anymore i need to drink human blood

crazy how there are only 2 hours of doing things every day before you keel over and die. if this werent normal id be worried

having chronic pain is just like. ur sitting perfectly still doing nothing meanwhile the space above your head keeps flashing -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp -1hp

some of you people are so annoying. i mean me too but good lord

heres your burger sir. i kissed it so sweetly. thatll be 44.21$ please

they should invent a doctor that is useful