Finding my Zen

2 more pounds until I’m back under 180!

I’m so proud of myself for staying strong and consistent. It feels so nice to fit comfortably in most of my clothes again 💕

I’ve got my eye on the prize which is looking good af and feeling confident af in my new swimsuit this summer 😎

It took a serious health scare for me to stop drinking like that and while I’m not completely sober, I don’t touch liquor anymore.

I feel so much stronger physically and mentally. I’m so proud of myself.

For comparison sake, here is a video of me from November, close to blacked out, along with a photo I took a couple of days ago. There’s so much for light in my eyes now 🥲💕

Today I came into work and saw that my new string of hearts plant has grown sooo much over the weekend and I’m geeking so hard about it! 💕

Down to 186.2 lbs!

I’ve been skeptical of avocado for a long time but I decided to give it another chance today and it was actually super delicious.

Also I broke through my plateau and have gotten to a new low weight in my Noom journey: 188.8 lbs.

I’m so annoyed! 🙄 bleggghh

But nobody said it would be easy. Persistence is key.

It’s a new week! That means, new opportunities for improvement.

As you can see, my weight loss graph spiked a bit this morning after a very indulgent New Years weekend. From 191 back up to 194. Am I going to beat myself up about it? No! Am I going to appreciate all of the beautiful memories that I got to make with my family and my partner? Yes!!

Weight loss isn’t linear and I wanted to make this post to show that you don’t have to be so hard on yourself if you see the scale fluctuate after a fun filled weekend. You just need to get back on track and keep trying!

Selfie included because I am cute ☺️

Decided to make an investment in myself today and join Noom. I love that the focus isn’t just on losing weight but on overall health and well being. I’m very excited to see how this goes!

My weight is close to going over 200 lbs for the first time in about 4-5 years and I’m not gonna lie, I have anxiety about it.

I caught myself being very pissed off at myself for letting this happen. But being angry at myself for gaining weight is ridiculous!

I am not going to be mad at myself for nourishing my body and focusing on loving my friends and family instead of losing weight. I am healthy and happy and extremely loved. My weight is not something that is going to make me sad because I have too many things to be thankful for.

I am going to try hard to make better choices moving forward because I would really like to lose weight and fit comfortably in all of my clothes again. But I’m not going to do it by being mean to myself.

I had weight loss surgery in 2016 and since I reached my lowest weight I’ve gained back 20-30 pounds because the world is a dumpster fire and I did not care anymore. Also I’m in love and I guess being in love makes you gain weight because you just lay around and eat and laugh together.

So I’ve been struggling with my self image since I gained weight. I mostly hate that my clothes are getting too tight.

Buuut last night my boo thang and I were getting frisky if you know what I mean and I was on top. I was right in line with a full length mirror in my room so I glanced over and I was like… OMG I AM HOT?! Who knew?!?

Should I do it? You only live once..