When in Rome 1/1
Summary: youāve been with Jensen for three years, you were hesitant to go to Rome because your relationship has been private. Until the moment his handler crosses a line.
Word count: 9940
Warnings: I donāt really think any. Maybe smut if you squint š¤£
A/n: Iāve been working on this since the premier. Iykyk enjoy.
The Roman sun was unapologetic, a heavy gold weight pressing through the sheer curtains of the Hotel de la Ville. It turned the air in the room into something thick and tactile, smelling of old-world dust and the expensive, sharp scent of his cologne. Outside, the city was a sprawling masterpiece of terracotta and marble, but inside, the world had narrowed down to the heat of the mattress and the man anchored against you.
You were turned toward him, your body instinctively seeking his heat. Jensenās face was buried deep in the curve of your shoulder, his breath a steady, humid rhythm against your skin that made your pulse skip. He didn't just hold you; he claimed you, his arm a heavy, protective bar across your waist that pulled you flush against the solid planes of his chest.
Tonight was the The Boys season five premiere. It felt like a looming tidal wave. You were a girl who preferred the quiet corners of the world, someone who had spent three years perfecting the art of being a shadow in his world. Youād barely ventured beyond the States, yet here you were in the heart of Italy, preparing to risk the "assistant" role everyone assumed you were that neither of you corrected and witness the spotlight that felt bright enough to burn.
The memory of him askingāno, pleadingāon the couch a week ago still made your chest tight. āJust be there. You donāt have to walk the carpet or take pictureās. Sit with me. Come to the after party. No cameras.ā He just wanted you with him. How could you say no?
The hand at your side tightened, his fingers dragging possessively over your hip. Jensen shifted, his scruff grazing the sensitive skin of your neck as he nudged closer, inhaling like you were the only clean air heād found in months.
"Good morning, beautiful," he grumbled, his voice a low, sleep-roughened friction against your ear.
He didn't wait for a reply. He caught your jaw, tilting your head back to find your mouth with a hunger that felt brand new every single time. One hand tangled deep into your hair, grounding you, while the other slid down to grip your thigh, pulling you closer until there wasn't a breath of space left between you. He broke the kiss just enough to hover, his eyes dark and focused entirely on yours.
"Look at my girl," he rasped, his voice dropping into that rough, proprietary growl. "Fucking perfect, baby."
Every word was punctuated by the brush of his lips against your jaw, his thumb tracing the line of your cheek with a reverent sort of intensity.
"Jensen," you breathed, your fingers curling into the hair at the nape of his neck as he rolled over you, pinning you into the silk sheets.
"Youāre a dream, you know that?" He murmured, lacing his fingers through yours and pressing them back against the pillow. "A fucking dream, and I donāt ever want to wake up. Youāre mine. All mine, princess."
Breakfast in Rome had become a ritual of beautiful chaos. You stood in the doorway of the sprawling marble bathroom, a plate balanced in one hand and a fork in the other, mid-bite and only half-dressed. Steam still curled off the glass shower door, carrying the scent of his sandalwood soap, while Jensen stood at the vanity, briskly toweling off.
"Keep looking at me like that and we won't get out of here on time, sweetheart," he huffed. A slow, knowing smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth as he secured the towel around his hips and began to stalk toward you.
"Weāre already late, babe," you grinned, stepping back just an inch as he invaded your space. "And it is entirely not my fault. One of us woke up particularly... persistent."
He didn't argue. He simply reached out, plucked the fork from your hand to steal a bite of eggs, and then leaned in to press a lingering, warm kiss to your temple. "Canāt help it, baby," he murmured against your skin, his voice dropping into that low, gravelly register. "You just look too good under me." He punctuated the thought with a playful, proprietary smack to your ass before heading toward the closet.
"Arenāt middle-aged men supposed to need a little help in that department?" you teased, leaning against the doorframe. "Yet youāre hornier than a teenager on prom night."
"Iām sure some do. Me? Iām in my prime, princess," he shot back over his shoulder, pulling a crisp button-down from the rack. He paused, looking back at you with an intensity that made your breath hitch. "Can you blame me? Look at you."
"A man after my own heart," you giggled, setting the plate down on a nearby side table. Your cheeks were already rosy from your makeup, but the flush deepening across your skin had nothing to do with blush. "Remind me why you never got married again?"
"None of āem were you," he said simply, his back to you as he shook out the shirt. "Just practice until you came along. Didnāt think Iād be waiting until my late-forties, but... better late than never, right?"
The sincerity in his voice caught you off guard, sending a warm ache through your chest. You watched his reflection in the mirror, watching the practiced ease of his movements.
"We arenāt married, Jay," you sang out, your voice playful but weighted with a longing feeling. In the mirror, you saw his hands pause on his buttons, a smug, dark-eyed grin spreading across his face.
Rome offered a kind of peace you hadn't expected. There was a profound sense of respect in the city; no one bombarded him for autographs, and no paparazzi lurked behind the ancient columns. It allowed for moments of normalcyāor as normal as it got when you were sandwiched between Jensen and Antony Starr. Jensenās hand remained securely locked in yours as he pointed out the architectural history of the ruins, his thumb tracing rhythmic circles over your knuckles.
But the day vanished too quickly, and soon you were back in the hotel, staring down the dress.
It was a column of tactical oliveāa color that felt grounded and commanding, a perfect mirror to the heavy, structured wool of Jensen's suit hanging beside it. Thousands of micro-sequins, stitched in precise vertical paths, ignited with a sophisticated gold shimmer. It wasn't a loud sparkle; it was the dangerous glint of sunlight on deep water. The bodice was a masterpiece of sharp lines, with impossibly thin triple-straps trailing upward like spiderwebs.
You stared at it, a familiar knot of imposter syndrome tightening in your stomach. You were the girl behind the scenes, the one who pinned the hems and fixed the buttons. You didn't belong in a dress that looked like armor and liquid gold, let alone matching the man that wore it with pride as Soldier Boy.
Jensen moved behind you, his heat radiating through your thin robe as he pulled your back against his chest. "You like it?" he whispered, his chin resting on your shoulder.
"Itās beautiful, Jensen. But is it... necessary? For a dark theater? An after-party?"
His hand moved, fingers gently covering your mouth to silence the protest. "We could be going to the damn living room and youād deserve to wear it, I know thatās what you really meant," he muttered. "I told wardrobe I wanted a dress that looked like it stood out against my suit. I wanted you to be surprised, and realize you do belong by my side, even when you donāt believe that. I like that it matches. Besides, you know how they work."
You did. You knew exactly how they worked.
That was the irony of it allāyou had spent your career choosing clothes for celebrities, never imagining youād be the one being fitted.
The history of wasn't a grand explosion; it was a slow-motion collision that started in a cramped trailer on the set of Walker. You were the emergency fill-in, a favor for a friend, up to your elbows in thread and tension when the door swung open.
āHey darlinā, sorry to bother you. I know youāre busy.ā
You looked up from your sewing machine, squinting against the Texas sun flooding in behind him. Standing there was a man who seemed to take up more space than the trailer allowed. He had a smile that felt like an invitation and eyes that crinkled at the corners as if heād been waiting all day to find someone to talk to.
āNot really,ā you said, offering a small smile as you wiped a stray thread from your cheek. āWhat can I do for you?ā
He paused, his head tilting slightly as he studied you with an intensity that made the air feel suddenly thin. āIām JensenāJensen Ackles. Iām directing today.ā He held out a hand, his grip warm and steady.
āIām Y/N. Head of wardrobe... well, for this week anyway.ā You shook his hand, feeling a strange spark of electricity that you quickly ignored. āIs there something wrong with the designs?ā
āNo, no. Theyāre great,ā he huffed a small laugh, his thumb grazing your knuckles for a heartbeat too long before he let go. āIāve gotta fill in for a scene. Quick in-and-out. Was gonna see if you had anything that might fit.ā
āOh. Yeah, of course. How soon?ā
āTen, fifteen minutes?ā He looked genuinely sheepish, a look that was far too charming on a man who had clearly spent his life as the most eligible bachelor in the industry.
āHang out a second,ā you said, turning to the racks. āIāll find something.ā
When you glanced back, he wasnāt standing by the door waiting; heād claimed your vacated chair, leaning back with his long legs stretched out, scrolling through his phone as if heād lived there his whole life. That was the first time you realized Jensen Ackles didnāt just enter a room; he settled into it.
Fate, however, had a longer game in mind. Two weeks later, you were back in New Mexico on Big Sky. You loved the rhythm of the set, the crew that felt like family, and the quiet pride of your work. Then came the news of the new āsheriffā. You only knew his measurementsātall, broad-shouldered, 34-longāuntil the door to your trailer opened once again.
āThis is our head of wardrobe, Y/N,ā Jeff Thomas announced, barely pausing as he ushered the new talent in. āSheās usually all over the place.ā
āNice to see a familiar face,ā Jensen said, that same crooked grin cutting through the room.
āLikewise,ā you said, folding your arms and leaning against your cutting table. āI wasnāt expecting you to walk into my trailer again.ā
āYou two know each other?ā Jeff asked, his voice tinged with a sudden, sharp note of jealousy.
āJensen directed Walker, while I was filling in for a friend,ā you explained simply, though the look Jensen was giving you felt anything but simple.
āSheās good at last-minute changes,ā Jensen smirked, his eyes trailing over the costumes on the rack. āAnd sizing.ā
āThat was a train wreck and you know it,ā you countered, the banter flaring up instantly. āI guarantee you these wonāt be like wearing Jaredās hoodie and skinny jeans with lace-up boots.ā
āDamn,ā he winked, the gold flecks in his eyes catching the light. āAnd here I hoped itād be identical. Still think that was one of my best looks.ā
The "slow burn" that followed was agonizingly casual. It was mix-ups with identical phones that led to late-night drinks and even later conversations in hotel bars where heād tell you about his brewery or his latest vintage car projectāalways careful, always the lone wolf, until he started looking for you in every crowded room.
It all came to a head when the "Council of Redheads"āReba and Dedeeādecided theyād had enough of the pining, their eyes twinkling with a brand of mischief only they could pull off.
"That boy doesnāt know what to say to you," Reba told you, leaning against your sewing table while you sat there in shock. "Heās purposely breaking buttons just to get back in here. If I have to see him forget one more line because you walked onto the set, Iām locking the two of you in a room."
Youād laughed it off as Dedee fed into itāuntil Jensen actually walked in, saw the "council of redheads" as heād called you countless times, and tried to bolt.
"Get your butt back in here, Ackles," Reba had commanded. Then, with a wink at you, she told him the trailer was all his, adding a cryptic, "Lock the door, Lonnie," as she exited.
And then you heard the actual sound of a lock that didnāt belong to the door.
Damn it Reba.
The silence that followed had been heavy. Youād watched him, really looked at him, and realized with a jolt that the missing boots, the torn vests, and the "accidental" check-ins when you were off-clock weren't coincidences.
āDo I want to know why weāre locked in here together?ā Jensenās voice broke the quiet, a low, easy chuckle that didn't quite hide the sudden tension in his shoulders. He dropped into the chair across from your sewing machine, his long bow legs stretching out, heavy āwork bootsā scuffing the linoleum. āNot that Iām complaining. Iād rather be stuck with you than just about anyone else on this set.ā
He picked up his phone, scrolling idly, but his eyes kept flicking toward you. You walked to the mini-fridge, the magnetic seal giving way with a soft pop as you reached for a water you didn't actually want.
āReba swears she sees things,ā you said, your back turned, your voice thin. āAnd Dedee... well, sheās always happy to feed into an illusion.ā
āWhat does she swear she sees?ā
The question was closer now. Much closer. You heard the distinct creak of his leather jacket as he stood up.
āNothing. Itāsāitās not a big deal,ā you waved off, staring intensely at a smudge on the fridge door. āJust a theory about one of the actors having a hypothetical thing for someone. I wasn't really listening. I was too busy trying to fix the stitching on that vest youāre supposed to wear tomorrow.ā
āYou werenāt working on anything when I walked in, darlinā.ā
The southern drawl was right at your ear now, thick and honey-slow. The heat radiating off him was more intense than the afternoon sun. You turned, and he was there, a solid wall of denim and flannel, trapping you against the cold metal of the fridge. He was so close you could see the flecks of gold in his green eyes and the way his eyelashes cast long shadows against his cheekbones.
You tried to look anywhere but his mouth. āI was... and then I was interrupted. Itās over there on myāā
He didn't let you finish. His hand, calloused and warm, cupped your jaw, his thumb tilting your chin up. The kiss didn't start soft; it was a collision, a build-up of "accidental" touches and lingering glances finally snapping. You froze for a heartbeat, the shock of it vibrating through your bones, before your eyes drifted shut and you melted.
His other hand slid into your hair, fingers tangling deep at the nape of your neck to hold you steady as he deepened the kiss. You tasted the coffee heād brought you earlier and the faint mint of his gum. Your hands, acting on impulse, gripped the sides of his shirt.
He groaned into your mouth, a low, hungry sound that vibrated in your own chest. He backed you harder into the fridge, his body pinning yours, his beard a rough, intoxicating friction against your skin. When he finally pulled back, just a fraction of an inch, his forehead rested against yours. Both of you were breathing like youād just run a mile.
āReally thought you were going to push me away,ā he breathed, his voice a wrecked whisper. āThought you were gonna tell me I was fucking insane.ā
You let out a shaky breath, your fingers tightening on his shirt. You looked up at him, a small, dizzy grin tugging at your lips.
āYou are fucking insane, Ackles,ā you whispered, reaching up to trace the line of his ear. āBut at least you aren't alone.ā
His grin widened, dark and triumphant, and as he pulled you back in, your hand shiftedāgripping the front of his shirt as he hauled you closer. The sharp snap of a button you just repaired hitting the floor was the only sound in the room, a perfect, unintentional punchline to the game heād been playing for weeks.
You didn't care about the repair. You didn't care about the vest. You just wrapped your arms around his neck and let him lock the world out.
It had been a silent agreement from that day on. You never labeled itānot until a year later on the set of Tracker, when Justin had smirked and asked if Jensen was bringing his own "wardrobe mistress" on jobs now.
Jensen hadn't even blinked. "Nope. Just my girlfriend."
Two years later, and "my girl.ā Was his favorite words. Between Nashville, Austin, and whatever set either of you were currently on. Standing there in Rome, looking at the dress that was made to match his suit, you realized Reba was right that day she locked you in the trailer. āIf he wanted to, he would.ā And he did daily.
So you could do this one thing for him. You wanted to. Because he was your āErosā no matter what trial you faced you knew youād come out together.
The Roman night had shed its golden warmth for a sharp, electric blue. The air around the theater was thick with the hum of a thousand voices and the rhythmic, artificial lightning of paparazzi flashes.
You had slipped through the back entrance, the heavy weight of the "Vought International PrimVideo" laminated pass, a nod kripke added gripped in your hand. Jensen had pressed it into your palm earlier that afternoon. You stood in the shadows of a velvet-draped corridor, exactly where heād told you to wait. From your vantage point, you could see the edge of the step-and-repeat. Jensen was a titan out thereājaw set, eyes crinkling with that practiced, effortless charisma that only he could weaponize so effectively.
Then, you saw her. Sofia.
The "handler." You felt the familiar, sharp twist of irritation in your chest. His team called her role "Strategic Talent Management," when he worked with her, but youād seen the way she hovered over Jensen and Jared for years. To the world, she was the barrier between the star and the chaos. To you, she was a woman who didn't know where the professional line ended and personal possession began.
You played the part, though. Each time they brought her in instead of anyone else. You were the "Assistant." You were the one who cross-referenced her "Strict Schedule" with the fake one you and Jensen whispered about over coffee at 5:00 AM. You were his accomplice in a world that wanted to own him.
As Jensen reached the end of the press line, his gaze swept the darkened wings of the corridor. When his eyes finally locked onto yours, his polished veneer cracked for a split second. His jaw tightened, and his stepāusually so steadyāfaltered. Heād seen you in jeans on set and in lace in bed, but heād never seen you like this
"Well, lookie who we have here."
The voice was unmistakable. You didn't even have to turn to know Jack was leaning against the wall beside you, a lopsided grin on his face. "Are we hiding from the cameras or waiting for the boyfriend?"
"Both," you murmured. "How has the ball-and-chain treated him?"
"Sofia?" Jack glanced toward the carpet where the handler was currently adjusting the lapel of Jensenās suit with a bit too much lingering. "They were arguing earlier. She was losing her mind that he wanted to take the cast bus with us. Sheās... intense. You don't like her?"
"She doesn't like any woman being close to him," you said, your voice low and rhythmic. "Much less this close. She doesn't know the truth, so I play my part."
Jack tilted his head, his expression softening into something more serious. "Remind me why we're playing parts again? You're both grown, and you're clearly happy."
"I'm ten years younger than him, Jack," you reminded him with a faint, tired smirk. "And Iāve seen the internet. I saw how they handled his last breakupāignoring the red flags that woman threw around and painted him as the villain for just... moving on. I don't want to be the next target for the think-pieces."
"You're scared," Jack said simply.
The honesty of it hit you like a physical weight. You looked up at him, the bravado slipping for a second. "Of course I'm scared. I love him. Iām terrified heās going to wake up one day, look at me and wonder why he didn't just pick someone easier."
"Canāt hide forever," Jack sang softly, nudging your shoulder with his.
"I can as long as he lets it slide," you countered, your eyes drifting back to the carpet. Jensen was walking toward the entrance now, Sofia hot on his heels, her hand hovering near the small of his back as she directed him. He was visibly annoyed already.
A sudden, sharp spike of possessiveness flared in your veins. "Go ahead," you murmured under your breath, watching her preen. "Ride his coattails all night, Sofia. I'll be the one riding him later."
Beside you, Jack let out a choked, startled sound. He looked down at you, eyes wide with pure, unadulterated shock.
"Oh shit," you blurted out, a soft, breathless laugh escaping you as you realized the filter had completely failed. "Did I say that out loud?"
"Yeah," Jack exhaled, rubbing a hand over his face. "Yeah, you definitely did."
"Whoops," you whispered, though as Jensenās eyes found yours againādark, burning, and promising everythingāyou didn't feel sorry at all.
āThere she is,ā he said, his voice cutting through the ambient noise like a physical touch. He didnāt just look at you; he studied you, his eyes traveling over the tactical olive and the way the gold sequins caught the light. āDonāt you look beautiful.ā
He leaned in, pressing a casual kiss to your cheekāa "friendly" gesture for anyone watching, but he let his face linger for a second too long, his nose brushing against your skin as he inhaled deeply, grounding himself in your scent.
āSorry Iām late,ā you smirked, leaning into the ease of your shared shorthand. āThere was this hideous bus filled with a bunch of idiots on it. Must have been some low-budget production.ā
āMust have been right behind ours,ā he grinned, his eyes dancing with a light reserved only for you. āFunny, I didnāt see it.ā
āOf course you didnāt,ā you playfully rolled your eyes. You reached up, your fingers instinctively finding his collar where it had creased slightly. As you smoothed the fabric and brushed an invisible stray thread from his chest, you looked up. For anyone else, you were just an attentive assistant. But you felt his chest expand under your palm, his heart thudding a heavy, frantic rhythm that matched your own. The raw, unfiltered adoration in his gaze made your breath hitch.
āIām really glad youāre here,ā he almost whispered, his thumb grazing your wrist for a fleeting, hidden second before he pulled back into the celebrity persona.
āWe have to go. Nice seeing you again,ā Sofiaās voice sliced through the moment. She clamped a hand onto Jensenās arm, her knuckles white as she tried to nudge him toward the theater doors.
Jensen didnāt budge. He stayed rooted to the spot, a stubborn, polite smile fixed on his face as he held an arm out toward the entrance. āAfter you, Y/N.ā
āItās a private event, Jensen,ā Sofia snapped, her professional veneer thinning. āYou canāt justāā
You didn't say a word. You simply lifted your hand, the pass reflected off the lights for a moment. Jensenās name was printed in bold black ink across the bottom. The protest died in Sofia's throat, her mouth snapping shut like a trap.
āI invited her,ā Jensen said, his voice hardening into a tone that brooked no argument. āShe isnāt here on business.ā He winked at you before holding out his hand āafter you.ā
Inside, the theater was a cavern of gold leaf and velvet. A roar of applause erupted as Jensen walked down the aisle, his smile lighting up the room as he waved. You followed, the slit in your dress offering a flash of leg with every step. When you reached the row, the seating was a mess: You, Sofia, Jensen, Antony.
You froze for a fraction of a second, the tension radiating off Sofia like heat off a pavement. Before a word could be uttered, Jensenās hand reached out, firmly but smoothly swapping your positions. Sofia started to hiss a dispute, but Jensen shot her a single, icy look that silenced her instantly.
The lights dimmed to a low, cinematic amber, the theater grew quiet. You crossed one knee over the other, and almost instantly, his hand found the opening in your skirt. His thumb began to trace slow, agonizingly rhythmic circles against your skin. It wasn't just a touch; it was an anchor.
He leaned over, ostensibly to whisper a comment about the screen, his shoulder pressing firmly into yours. His lips grazed your jawline, his breath warm and steady.
āArenāt you supposed to be focusing on your show?ā you whispered, a smirk tugging at your mouth.
āIām looking at the star,ā he murmured back. He shifted just enough to press a lingering, inconspicuous kiss to the shell of your ear, his hand moving to lace his fingers through yours, squeezing tight. To anyone else, his hands were simply folded in his lap; in reality, he was holding onto you like a lifeline.
āIām really happy you came, baby,ā he breathed.
āMe too, honey.ā
When the credits rolled and the house lights surged, the theater exploded. The cast and Kripke stood for the ovation, and your hands stung from clapping so hard. You didnāt look at the screen; you looked at Jensen, standing tall, soaking in the love heād earned. He caught your eye for one brief, private second amidst the chaos, a small, genuine smile playing on his lips that said that it was just for you.
He was talking to Karl and Antony after the theatre cleared out, you stood off to the side, hands folded in front of you clutching your bag. Sofia drifted toward you, her movement sharp and predatory.
She didnāt raise her voice; she didnāt need to. She leaned in close, the scent of her cloying, inexpensive perfume hitting you like a physical wall.
āItās over, sweetie. You can leave through the service exit now,ā she murmured, her eyes raking over your olive dress with a look of profound pity. āYou arenāt cast, and you donāt work for the studio. Your presence here is no longer valid. In fact, itās a bit of an eyesore.ā
You turned slowly, meeting her stare with a calm that felt like a cold sweat. āAre you like this with everyone you work with? Or just the ones who youāre so desperate to get in their pants?ā
Sofia didnāt flinch. She simply adjusted the strap of her bag, her expression shifting to one of bored superiority. āIām working. Something you wouldn't understand, seeing as your only contribution tonight is taking up a seat that could have gone to wellā¦anyone else.ā
āNo, youāre controlling. Thereās a difference,ā you huffed.
āYouāre his assistant, yet you showed up matching him,ā she sneered, her voice dropping to a jagged, venomous whisper. āAnd youāre calling me desperate? Youāre a charity case, darling. A name on a check he provides to keep you quiet and available. He specifically asked for me to be his handler tonight because he needed a professional, not a pet in a pretty dress.ā
āWow,ā you nodded, a humorless laugh bubbling up. āOne: No, he didnāt. He asked for Corey or Cliff, but they were busy. Two: Jensen doesnāt pay me. But you keep believing whatever lie helps you feel like more than a glorified babysitter, Sofia.ā
Her eyes flashed, the mask of professionalism finally cracking. Before she could retort, she saw Jensen laughing at something Antony said just a few feet away. Her hand shot out, her fingers splaying across his bicep in a slow, possessive, and entirely unprofessional stroke.
āItās time to go, Jensen,ā she cooed, her back to you as she tried to physically partition him off. āWeāre on a schedule.ā
Jensen didn't even acknowledge the touch. He didn't tighten his muscle or pull away; he simply acted as if she were a ghost, his attention remaining anchored on the conversation, his eyes darting back to you every few seconds to ensure you were still within reach.
Sofiaās hand lingered on his arm, her fingers twitching with a desperation she couldn't quite hide, even as she threw one last, degrading look over her shoulder at you. It was a look that said you were a temporary distraction, a flicker of light compared to her supposed sun.
āI knew I recognized you!ā
You turned to see Eric Kripke approaching with a wide, genuine grin. You stepped into his hug, feeling the genuine warmth of a friend. He held you at arm's length, admiring the dress. āDonāt you look like something out of a fairytale. Jensen didnāt tell me you were coming!ā
āIt was last minute,ā you lied smoothly, Ericās eyes twinkling with the knowledge of the truth. āI wasn't sure I could get off work.ā
āYouāre coming to the party, right?ā Eric asked. You caught Jensenās eye across the room; he gave you a small, meaningful nod before Sofia finally succeeded in steering him toward the exit.
āI am,ā you told Eric softly. He offered his arm, and you took it, feeling the eyes of the remaining stragglers on the two of you.
āSheās a fucking nightmare, isnāt she?ā Eric whispered as you walked toward the elevators.
You didn't answer with words; the look you gave him said everything. But Sofia wasn't done playing. In a final, petty display of power, she diverted Jensen through a "security-only" route, separating him from the rest of the group.
By the time you arrived at the after-party suite, Jensen was nowhere to be found. You were alone in a room full of stars, waiting for the man who was currently being "handled" right out of a celebration he was a big part of.
The air in the after-party suite was thick with the scent of expensive bourbon and the upbeat hum of a successful premiere.
Eric, Antony, and Laz were gathered around you, their "public" faces shelved for the moment as they checked in with you, keeping you looped into the conversation. Then you saw him.
Jensen didn't just walk into the room; he practically stormed it. He had a glass of amber liquid gripped in one hand, his knuckles white against the crystal. His jaw was set so tight you could see the muscle leaping in his cheek. Behind him, Sofia trailed with a look of smug, professional indifference, as if she hadn't just spent the last twenty minutes sabotaging his arrival at his own celebration.
"There he is!" Antony called out, his grin widening as he stepped forward to play the part of the perfect distraction.
Jensen didn't even look at the others. He made a beeline for you, his eyes dark with a brewing storm.
"What's wrong?" you asked softly, stepping into his space to create a small, private island in the middle of the room.
"I need five fucking minutes," he breathed, the words barely more than a jagged rasp.
Antony caught the vibe and took Jensen's near-empty glass, nodding to the others to give you both a sliver of space. You reached out, your fingers finding the edge of his cuff to straighten it, but as your skin brushed his, Jensenās hand shot out. He didn't just touch you; he clamped his hand around your wrist, anchoring himself to you as if you were the only thing keeping him from leveling the room.
He dragged his free hand down his face, a long, ragged exhale shuddering through him.
"I told her three times," he muttered, his voice dropping to a dangerous, low frequency. "Three times exactly where we were supposed to be. She kept taking me down the wrong service hallways, 'forgetting' which floor the suite was on, talking over me like I was a child who didn't know his own shit."
"Breathe, Jay. Just breathe," you whispered, your thumb stroking the back of his hand where he still held your wrist. "Donāt let her set you off. Enjoy the night you worked for."
"Itās one thing to do your job," he sighed, his shoulders finally dropping an inch, though the fire in his eyes hadn't gone out. "It's another to treat me like a prisoner in a suit."
"At least she didn't tell you that your presence was 'no longer valid,'" you huffed, a sharp, humorless laugh escaping you before you could stop it.
The effect was instantaneous. Jensenās head snapped up, his gaze narrowing into something lethal. "She what?"
Tony drifted back by, sliding a double whiskey into Jensen's hand without a word. Jensen took a heavy swallow, his eyes never leaving yours.
"I handled it," you said, offering him a reassuring smile. "Drink your whiskey, make your rounds. I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."
"Jensen, they're waiting for you. We have the reporters coming in for photos." Sofiaās voice cut through the air like a siren. You didn't even look at her, merely rolling your eyes toward the floor.
"Iāll be there in a second!" Jensen barked. The sheer roughness of his voice made a few people nearby pause. He took another long pull of his drink, then reached out to take the rest of what you were sipping, finishing it in one go as if he needed the extra armor.
The room was filling up, the pressure of his "star" duties pressing in. He looked down at you, his expression softening just enough for you to see the exhaustion underneath the anger.
"Guess I better make those rounds," he murmured, his thumb catching yours one last time in a hidden squeeze. "You gonna be alright?"
"I'll be fine, Jay," you promised, giving him a sweet, steady smile that was meant only for him. "Don't let her get to you.ā
Before Jensen could take a single step toward his "star duties," the social gravity of the room shifted.
āWe need a picture of this moment. The two of you matching is gold.ā Susan drifted over, eyes bright with a knowing, playful glint. āWhat a coincidence,ā Colbie giggled, her gaze bouncing between you.
āJust one,ā Jensen grinned, the sound of his voice dropping into that smooth, public-facing charm, though you could feel the raw tension still vibrating off him.
He didnāt hesitate. He hooked a heavy, possessive arm around your waist, pulling you flush against his side with a strength that felt less like a pose and more like a claim. The heat of his palm seeped through the thin fabric of your dress, grounding you instantly. Your hand instinctively started to rise toward his chestāa gesture of comfort youād done a thousand timesābut you caught yourself at the last micro-second. You dropped your hand back to your side, curling your fingers into a hidden fist, and offered the camera a polished, practiced smile.
But as the phone came down and Susan opened her mouth to speak, the bubble burst. A handāsharp and demandingāwedged itself between your bodies, physically trying to pry Jensen away from you.
āTheyāre calling for you. We are behind,ā Sofiaās voice rang out, shrill and impatient, cutting through the music like a serrated blade.
It was like time slowed down. You felt the muscle in Jensenās side turn to granite. He pulled back just enough to register the hand on his side, and then, he snapped. The polished, professional mask didn't just slip; it was incinerated.
āCan you give me ten fucking minutes with my girlfriend?ā
His voice wasn't a shout, but it had a resonant, vibrating power that made the nearby conversations die instantly. āIāve let you drag me around for four fucking hours,ā he continued, his eyes locked on Sofiaās with a terrifying focus. āIāve listened to you tell her she could fucking leave like itās your damn decision to make. Iām a grown man, Sofia. I can handle myself.ā
The color drained from your face. You felt the weight of every pair of eyes in the room shifting toward you, but Jensenās hand never wavered. It stayed anchored to your back, his fingers splayed wide as if he were marking his territory for the entire world to see.
He leaned in closer to Sofia, his voice dropping to a low, lethal frequency that made the hair on your arms stand up. āYou ever speak to her like that again, and we will be having a much different conversation. You need to leave. Right now.ā
The silence that followed was heavy, broken only by the distant clink of a glass. Sofia looked smaller than youād ever seen her, her mouth opening and closing before she turned and vanished into the crowd.
Without a backward glance, Jensen turned his entire focus back to you, then to Susan, his expression smoothing over with a terrifyingly calm grace.
āWhat were you saying?ā he asked, his voice returning to that smooth, honeyed baritone as if there weren't a hundred silent camerasāmental and literalāgoing off at once.
āI was going to ask about the shadow following you,ā Susan said, her voice a bit shaky as she gave a half-hearted smile. She looked at the two of you, clearly seeing right through the ruins of the mask Jensen had been forced to wear all night. āBut you... you covered it. Good job standing up for yourself, Jensen. You don't do that enough.ā
āUsually,ā Jensen sighed, the tension finally leaving his shoulders in a long, weary exhale, āI donāt have to.ā
You were frozen, your mind racing to catch up with the fact that the secret was goneāblown apart in a single moment of protective fury. Jensen didn't give you time to spiral. His grip on your waist tightened, firm and grounding, as he gave a subtle nod toward the open balcony doors.
āLetās get some air,ā he murmured, leading you away from the wreckage of the secret and into the quiet dark.
The March air in Rome was crisp, a sharp, bracing contrast to the suffocating heat of the ballroom. It carried the scent of rain and ancient stone, and you breathed it in, trying to steady the frantic rhythm of your heart. Behind the glass doors, the party continued, but the atmosphere had shifted; the shockwave of Jensenās outburst was already rippling through the crowd, and you knew by morning, the grainy phone footage would be the only thing the internet talked about.
As the balcony door clicked shut, the silence felt heavy. Jensenās grip on your waist loosened, his hand sliding away as he turned to face you. The adrenaline that had made him look like a god of war ten minutes ago had ebbed, leaving behind a raw, guilt-ridden exhaustion.
āIām sorry,ā he whispered, the words jagged and low. āI was pissed. I just... I shattered the one thing we were trying to protect. I know youāre probably wishing youād stayed in Nashville right about now.ā He let out a deep, ragged sigh that seemed to carry the weight of the entire night.
āI donāt. Iām glad I came,ā you said, leaning back against the cool marble of the railing. You gave a small, weary shrug. āI didnāt expect you to single-handedly tell the world weāre dating at the loudest possible moment, but shit happens. Canāt hide forever, right?ā
He raised a dark brow, searching your face for the anger he clearly expected to find. āYou arenāt mad?ā
āIām shocked, Jay. Iāve spent three years wondering how you stay so calm in the middle of all this toxic industry bullshit. Iāve watched you take it on the chin a thousand times when you should have exploded.ā You looked at your shoes, a small, sad smile tugging at your lips. āI guess I didnāt realize Iād be the straw that finally broke the camel's back.ā
āOf course you are,ā he interrupted, his voice dropping an octave. He stepped into your space, the heat radiating off him despite the chill. āI signed up for this. The cameras, the fake smiles, the handlers... I can handle Sofia dragging me away or directing my every move because thatās the job. But you didnāt sign up for that.ā
He reached out, his fingers wrapping around your wristānot to restrain you, but to anchor himself. āI heard some of what she said to you in there. Youāre already terrified of this life, and the last thing I need is some power-tripping handler making you feel like you donāt belong in this world just because I happen to exist in it.ā
āJayāā
āIām serious,ā he pressed, his thumb stroking the sensitive skin of your inner wrist. āYou think youāre less-than because you work behind the camera instead of in front of it. Youāve said for years, this isnāt where you belong. But you do. Fuck what she thinks, and fuck anyone else who has an opinion on it.ā He cupped your jaw then, his palm warm and slightly rough against your skin. āI love you. And you didnāt deserve that shit. Iām so fucking sorry, darlinā.ā
You moved your hands to his chest, feeling the solid, rapid thud of his heart through the fine wool of his suit. āI knew what I was getting into the moment I let myself fall for you,ā you whispered, looking up into those green eyes that were currently burning with a protective fire. āWe just got comfortable in the silence.ā
āThis is going to get messy,ā you added, your voice barely audible over the distant Roman traffic. āTheyāre going to scream damage control tomorrow. Theyāll find a way to blame the whiskey, or say I was just a distraction to take the spotlight off the show. Theyāll try to make Sofia look like the victim against a 'stressed' actor.ā
A small, defiant smile touched your lips as Jensen followed your movement, pressing his body against yours until you were pinned between the stone railing and his solid frame. The tension between you changedāthe anger from the room shifted into a heavy, magnetic pull that made the air feel electric.
You leaned up just enough to graze your lips against his. It started as a hesitant peace offering, but the moment your skin touched, the dam broke. Jensenās hand on your waist tightened, hauling you flush against him, and he kissed you with a desperate, starved intensity. It wasnāt for show; it was the kiss of a man who had finally stopped pretending.
Your head fell back, your neck going limp as he cradled the nape of your head, his fingers tangling in your hair to hold you exactly where he wanted you. As his lips moved against yours.
When he finally pulled back, he didn't go far, his forehead resting against yours as you looked up at him, dazed and breathless.
āLet them,ā he whispered against your mouth, his breath hot in the cold air. āNo one speaks for me. The second they bring your name up to drag it through the mud, Iāll shut it the fuck down. I promise you.ā
You hummed with a small nod. āI love you too by the way.ā You grinned.
The aftermath of Rome hadn't been a quiet fading out; it was a scorched-earth policy. Jensen had dug his heels in, flatly refusing the "scripted apology" his PR team had drafted before the plane even touched down in the States. In the week that followed, the internet became a minefield. Articles, grainy cell phone captures, and slow-motion breakdowns of the "Premier Blowout" were everywhere.
The discourse was exhausting. Some fans hailed him as a protective hero, while others dissected the whiskey glass in his hand, claiming he was spiraling. Then there were the conspiracy theorists, the ones convinced you were a plantāa PR stunt designed to give Jensen a grittier, "real-life" edge.
Through it all, Jensen had become a ghost in his own skin. He wasnāt sleeping. Youād feel him slide out of bed at 4:00 AM, the mattress shifting as he retreated to the living room to pace or stare at his phone in the dark. By the time you dragged yourself in from work, he was pacing or locked in a low-voiced, heated argument in the other room.
The tension followed you to the next set you were working on. You were standing in the wings, mindlessly smoothing the wrinkles out of a backup wardrobe change for the lead actress, waiting for the eleventh reset of a scene that just wouldn't click.
āHave you seen this?ā
You turned to find Kristina, the lead makeup artist, hovering nearby. She wasn't looking at the monitors; she was holding her phone out like it was a live grenade. On the screen was Jensenās faceānot a paparazzi shot, but a raw, front-facing camera angle.
āNo,ā you said, a knot of anxiety tightening in your chest. You fumbled for your own phone.
āYou should watch it,ā Kristina said, her voice soft but her eyes bright with a strange kind of pride. āHeās... heās really going for it.ā
The notification hit your lock screen a second later. A tag. Jensen had tagged you in a video. You didn't wait; you ducked out the heavy soundstage doors, seeking the quiet of the New Mexico morning as the video began to play.
āNever thought Iād be doing this⦠this is going to be a long one,ā Jensen began. He was sitting on the velvet couch in the hotel suite, looking tired but sharper than he had in days. He shook his head, a dry, humorless laugh escaping him. āI like to think Iāve shared more than most do in my position, but what happened last week has raised more questions, accusations, and finger-pointing than I ever thought it would.ā
He leaned into the camera, his green eyes piercing. āMy team wants me to apologize. And I am sorryāto my fans, to my castmates, and to everyone in Rome. Yāall shouldnāt have had to see me that way. It wasn't the time or the place for a scene.ā He shrugged, his mouth twisting into a small, defiant smirk.
You leaned your head against the corrugated metal of the soundstage, your heart hammering.
He continued, standing up and beginning to pace. āThereās a lot of yāall who have encountered Sofia in the pastāIāve seen the comments, I've seen the stories floating around. Had I known this was a frequent problemāthat sheād spoken to any of you the way sheās been speaking to the people I care about in my day to day life... we would have been having this conversation a lot sooner. Jared and I would have handled it on the spot.ā
He stopped, his jaw clenching so hard you could see the muscle leap. āIāve spent my career making sure yāall know I donāt take this for granted. I wouldnāt be here if it werenāt for you guys. Itās a family. But I havenāt been the best I can be for you. Iāve let myself be controlled, believing it was for my own good, but itās not. Not anymore.ā
āIām not doing this for the studio,ā he began, his voice a low, gravelly rasp that skipped the usual polished intro. āAnd Iām definitely not doing it for the people whoāve spent the last week calling my cellphone yelling at me. Iām doing this because I canāt breathe under the weight of the shit anymore.ā
He took a jagged breath, looking down at his hands before staring back into the lens with a raw, agonizing honesty.
āIāve spent twenty-five years being exactly who everyone told me to be. Iāve been the āgood soldier.ā Iāve smiled when I was told to smile, Iāve kept my personal life a locked vault for three years, because I was told it was the only way to protect my career. But what happened in Rome... it wasn't a PR nightmare. It was the first time in years I actually felt like a human being.ā
He leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees, his face filling the frame.
āMy team wants me to apologize to Sofia. They want me to say I was āover-tiredā or āstressed.ā But Iām done lying. Iām not sorry. Iām not sorry for protecting the woman who has been the only constant thing in my life for three years. Iām not sorry for snapping at someone who treated the person I love like she was disposable. If the cost of being āprofessionalā is watching the most important person in my life get belittled and being told her presence isnāt valid? Then I donāt want to act like a professional anymore. I miss having fun in my career even when Iām off.ā
His jaw clenched, and for a second, you could see the shimmer of tears he was fighting back.
He looked at the screen, squinting at something. āTime is running out... I guess thatās it. Noāno itās not. Sit tight. Iām not done. I just have to figure out how to turn this damn thing off. Son of aāā
The video cut to black. You stared at the "Replay", a dazed, amused grin breaking through your shock. Even in the middle of a career-defining manifesto, he was still the same man who struggled with Instagram.
Behind you, the heavy doors groaned open. The crew began filing out for lunch, a sea of flannels and headsets. You remained tucked against the wall, trying to process what heād just done. Heād gone rogue. Heād burned the bridge with Sofia and his team and stood in the embers just to tell the world he was done lying.
Then, you saw him.
In the middle of the crowd, Jensen appeared like a glitch in the matrix. He was walking toward the trailers, staring intensely at his phone, his thumb hovering over the screen in frustration. When he looked up and caught your eye, the hard line of his shoulders finally relaxed.
He didn't wait. He walked straight to you, ignoring the whispers of the crew members passing by.
āI need your help...ā He stopped inches from you, holding the phone out like a broken piece of himself.
You looked at the device, then back up at his tired, beautiful face. A soft, breathless laugh bubbled up in your chest. āSo you drove an hour out of the city, all the way to my set, because youāre having technical difficulties?ā
Jensen let out a long, weary breath, his eyes searching yours for any sign that heād pushed too hard. āI couldnāt figure out how to post the second part,ā he admitted, his voice dropping to that private, honeyed tone that always made your knees weak. āAnd I didn't want to say the rest of it without you standing right there.ā
āSo you didnāt mean to be live?ā You smirked, glancing at the screen where comments were scrolling at a speed that was impossible to read.
āNo, fuck. Am I?ā He looked at the phone, then back at you, his eyes widening in genuine horror.
āYeah, Jay. Youāve been live for a solid hour.ā You giggled, reaching out to brush a stray lock of hair from his forehead. Your touch was lingering, tenderāa silent promise that despite the chaos, you were right here. āYou werenāt singing at the top of your lungs on the drive over, were you?ā
āNo, I was just driving. I think. My phone was locked.ā He laughed, the sound rusty but warm. He leaned down, catching your scent, and pressed a slow, firm kiss to your temple. It wasn't a "publicity" kiss; it was the desperate anchor of a man who finally found home. āI just needed to get off that and get to the other video I did. Iām setting the record straight so I can enjoy my time off with you on vacation.ā
āStill live, Jay,ā you whispered, leaning your head against his shoulder for a brief, blissful second.
āI donāt care.ā He repeated the motion, his lips lingering against your skin as if he were trying to memorize the feel of you. Then he took your hand, lacing his fingers through yours. āDonāt end it. I have a better idea.ā
Back in the quiet sanctuary of your trailer, the air smelled of cedar. You kept your hands busy with a stray hem, trying to ground yourself as he spoke to the camera.
āWell, now that I know yāall are here... and Iām here. The second half of that was me saying the assumptions are all wrong.ā He smiled, a genuine, dark-lashed look that went straight to the lens. āCompletely wrong. Y/N and I never corrected anyone when they assumed she was my assistant. Sheās not. Sheās actually head of wardrobe on anything she works on...ā He looked up at you, his eyes glowing. āSheās the reason Beau Arlen was so good looking.ā
āThatās just your face, honey. I just dressed you,ā you teased, a soft glow in your eyes as you met his gaze.
āReba locked us in Y/Nās trailer and weāve been together ever since, but thatās a story weāll save for another time,ā he continued, his voice softening into a deep, steady rumble. āWe werenāt planning on announcing it any time soon. Until I snapped. And Iāll owe her an apology 'til the end of time for it. She wasnāt expecting it. Nor the hate that came with it. Sheās stood by me for three years, dealt with the headaches, the rumors, listening to accusations of her boyfriend being the sole reason his last relationship didnāt work.ā
You stopped what you were doing. The needle felt heavy in your hand as his eyes locked onto yours from across the room, ignoring the thousands of people watching.
āJensen,ā you whispered, the name a soft plea.
āIām serious. And you handle it with grace, every time I say Iām sorry. Hell, this last week I ignored us over this nightmare. Iām tired of replaying it. Reading about it.ā He looked back at the screen one last time. āI snapped because she was dragging me around like a lap dog, telling my girlfriend her presence wasnāt valid, and saying she was desperate because her dress matched my suit. I picked that damn thing out without her even knowing about it. I let wardrobe dress her for the night. And they killed it. If my PR team wants an apology, this is the one theyāre going to get.ā
He stood up, the phone forgotten on the table as he stepped toward you. He stopped directly in front of you, his large frame blocking out the rest of the world.
āIām sorry,ā he whispered, his voice cracking just a fraction. He took your face in both of his hands, his thumbs stroking your cheekbones. āIām sorry for Rome, Iām sorry for this week... hell, darlinā, Iām sorry for the last three years of rumors, accusations, headaches, broken travel plans. I'm sorry for my lack of giving everything I have to you because I didnāt stop them. Iām sorry Iāve proven every fear you had about dating an actor.ā
You leaned into his touch, your own hands coming up to cover his, feeling the warmth and the slight tremor in his fingers.
āNot every one,ā you corrected him softly, your voice steady and filled with a fierce, quiet love. āYouāve never cheated, abused, or lied to me. And you don't have to keep apologizing, Jay. I knew what I signed up for. Let them talk, let the PR team accuse me of whatever they want. It wonāt make me love you any less. It wonāt change my mind.ā
You stepped even closer, your foreheads resting together. āYou don't have to publicly apologize to me because there is nothing to apologize for. The fact that this has eaten you alive just proves to me why you were the exception. You're the only one I'd ever break my rules for.ā
Jensen let out a shuttered breath, closing his eyes as he pulled you into a crushing embrace, burying his face in the crook of your neck.
You stayed there for a long moment, tucked into the solid, familiar heat of his chest, listening to the way his heart finally began to slow its frantic pace. You could feel the exhaustion rolling off him, the heavy weight of a man who had spent a week fighting a war he never wanted to start.
Slowly, you pulled back just enough to look up at him. You reached up, your fingers tracing the faint, tired shadows under his eyes before resting against his neck, where you could feel his pulse steadying under your touch.
āJay, look at me,ā you whispered.
He opened his eyes, the vibrant green still clouded with a lingering flicker of doubt.
āYouāve spent so much time worrying about whether youāre 'protecting' me or if youāre a 'burden' because of your job,ā you said, your voice soft but unwavering. āBut you need to hear this: You are the easiest person to love Iāve ever known. You arenāt the chaos, Jensen. Youāre the place I go to get away from it. Every time you walk into a room, every time you check in on me during a long shoot, or I call you because youāre a world away and I just miss you and you answer, even if itās three am and you have to be up at four, every time you choose us over a script or a meetingāyou are proving that Iām exactly where I belong.ā
You leaned up, pressing a lingering, tender kiss to the corner of his mouth.
āYou didnāt fail me in Rome. You chose me. And I would choose you in that theater, on that balcony, and in this trailer every single day for the rest of my life,ā you breathed against his skin. āStop looking for reasons why I shouldn't be here, and just start believing that Iām never leaving. You're my home, Ackles. Not the shows, not the fame. Just you.ā
Jensen let out a shaky, broken laugh, his eyes shimmering as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. He didn't say a wordāhe didn't have to. The way he pulled you back into him, hiding his face in your shoulder while he finally took a full, deep breath, said everything.
Across the room, the phone sat forgotten, the live stream still humming with the silent realization of millionsābut in that trailer, the only thing that existed was the quiet, absolute certainty of a love that no longer had to hide.
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