I Wanna Take A Nap... (_ _).｡o○

Once a library teen told me I’d lost the game and I said “What game?” She tried to explain and I kept asking ‘what?’ and she explained more and this went on for WEEKS of this child get wound up and me just going ‘what game is this again?’ 😈

Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"

I love this post

The horse thinks as it scratches an itch

"have you learned how to drive yet" i have the spirit of friendship in my heart. the joy of lifes little things in my soul. the whimsy of magic. the beautiful enjoyment of nature. the answer is no though

was talking to a coworker and realised i could not for the life of me remember his name but i was too embarrassed to ask because we've spoken multiple times so mid-conversation i started concocting a plan to nudge the conversation towards the ID photos on our building passes so that i could be like oh my ID photo is awful haha the camera they use to take these has a real talent for making me look as unphotogenic as possible and then he would say oh yes me too haha everyone says that (because they do) and then i would be able to say well let me see yours it can't be as bad as mine! and he would show me his ID because we are coworkers and why wouldn't he and this would allow me to see his building pass which of course would have his name on it and then i would be able to say well yours is perfectly nice it must be me that's the problem! and then we would have a polite chuckle about it and i would have his name without needing to ask for it and he would be none the wiser and all would be well but then before i could execute this fine plan a little voice in my head went "so this is some light yagami bull shit you are about to pull" which was such a violent reality check it shocked me completely out of my embarrassment and i went "hey im so sorry your name has slipped my mind could you remind me" and he did and it was fine.

"This is some Light Yagami bull shit you are about to pull" <- Littany against avoiding small embarrassing/awkward moments that don't matter with over the top ass mind games.

I know people like to clown on aspects of classic Disney films that don't feel grounded in reality. But I've worked both front and back of house in restaurants of varying quality. And if I found out our line cook or something served a full plate of spaghetti to two dogs in an alley, I would consider that like. Like not good. But possible.

I've said it before, I will say it again. Tramp was shown latter in the movie to be a ratter. It is not at all farfetched to think that he might have once hunted a bunch of rats that threatened the restaurant and so the head chef considers him a valuable ex-employee and friend.

calling things "cutes" is so uh. what's a good word for when something is cute but slightly more cute

the word cutes is autological

The first rule of fandom is have fun. The second rule of fandom is find an enabler and become an enabler. Yes you should write that fic. What if it was even hornier? What if it was angstier? What if you wrote it just for me?

maybe if we keep speculating about mitch mcconnell more different repub senators will drop dead