k i y a /

i think i just feel functioning more than anything? and actually, that is not out of the ordinary for most humans... lmao not me getting incredibly gassed for simply being able to shower, get dressed, not stay in bed all day, cook, eat, practice standard daily hygiene, hold a conversation with someone, do yoga, watch interesting shit, do school work. okay. now i am writing this all out maybe perhaps i am just simply functioning for the first fucking time in my life. and not manic/in a high episode.... huh,...... wuld you look at that folks

i feel really good, i wondered if perhaps i'm in one of the more manic/high cyclothymia phase right now. though i am enjoying and finding more comfort in believing that something just somehow clicked the minute it became my birthday

very glad i spent my birthday with my parents and sister. my mum made my favourite food, my parents and i got stoned, and we sat in their garden all evening listening to music. when i got home i smoked a bit more and watched a childhood family favourite film and laughed a lot... i journaled, i ate my favourite foods, i looked pretty, i was hearing from / texting the people who are still in my life. today ive allowed myself to be lazy but then went for a walk around the neighbourhood and found some gorgeous capris in a charity shop at the end of my walk. i’ve just felt soooo at peace all weekend. ive not long got done doing some yoga too. idk. i feel different. you know when people say that you usually don’t suddenly feel X years old if you’re turning X…. i really do suddenly feel 28 years old since turning 28 yesterday lmao

had a lovely birthday yesterday. in fact, this whole weekend has just been splendid, i think this might be the first birthday i’ve had where i didn’t feel terribly sick, anxious, and like there is a massive pit in my stomach. it feels good!