Felix S. Warren , Writer & Artist

First of all, if you’re not homeless, consider this a “what if” scenario or an informative guide on what it’s like out there for others dealing with having no place to live. If you are homeless, I hope you’re doing well and I hope I can give you some tips that make it easier for you to live. And if you’ve got some time and the spare income, I have a tip jar at Ko-Fi where people can compensate me for these guides I write and help me deal with my own homelessness situation. No pressure, there’s a reason I make these articles on homelessness free and publicly available. This guide is going to be most useful for people living in the United States of America since that’s where I’ve been racking up my homelessness experience points for almost a year at this point.

Second of all, I’m sorry but there’s no safety net left anymore. If you want rental assistance you need to already have been evicted and you also need to have only as much rental debt as a public assistance fund will have in it. You also need to be the first person in line to ask for that assistance that month, which is just impossible. A lot of the suggestions I've gotten when homeless have basically added up to: "have you tried going back in time and keeping yourself from being homeless in the first place?" And the answer is yes, I've tried, but apparently the laws of physics don't let me do that. But if you find yourself asking, when you're on the street, "is there a way I could have prevented myself from getting into this situation," the answer is most likely, "no." So don't feel bad. Please don't blame yourself.

As for the safety net that helps you get back into housing... well, there's a waiting list for that, and also, you have to qualify. If you do qualify, you still have to wait. So while you're waiting for the housing, you are... HOMELESS! And there are not enough shelters or sleep pods or whatever to hold everyone who has been pushed out of conventional housing. So you are going to have to figure out how to wait it out, where to be, how to feed yourself, how to get clean, how to do EVERYTHING. You're going to have to figure it all out and it's going to be different for every single person this affects, because we all have different needs.

In your area there may be social workers who can talk with you and assist you in how to get through this, and may know about programs and places you could utilize, and may even have free toiletries and food for you. Try starting at your local library, else, you'll probably want to look at civil assistance. If there's nothing in your area, I'm very sorry. There are still a few places to look at, though you might need to be a little daring.

One place I've found a lot of assistance, surprisingly, is churches and other religious institutions. Look up in your area whether there are churches that are accepting of your identity. If you're dubious that a church will assist someone who is like you, for instance because you're LGBTQ, it's more likely than you think. If a church is flying a big ole pride flag outside it is a likely indicator that they are trying to signal to people like you that they're here for you despite all the reasons you think they might be. I've been getting a lot of assistance from a local church and, I want to be clear, I am not a person who goes to church regularly and I don't consider myself Christian. It took a lot to go into church and talk with someone there and tell them what my situation was. I don't expect that everyone can do this. You might need to ask someone to go in for you and talk to people for you if you have too much prior trauma from religious institutions. If you can manage it, it can be very worth it. From the local church I developed a relationship with (entirely while homeless, I did not do any church stuff previous to this and was quite avoidant), I have gotten a full set of bedding, warm clothes, a very good reusable water bottle, a place to safely sit inside and charge my phone, and a place to discreetly go into the kitchen and microwave food every now and then. I actually consider the church to be my best assistance in the area because the people in there are very emotionally and personally invested in helping people in need. By the way, you do not need to go to church services to get assistance, just go in when their office hours are open and ask if you can talk to someone for assistance or schedule a time to do so. At the very least, they will probably be connected with local assistance programs and know people in the area who can assist you.

A little more on the church topic: the reason I am suggesting heavily that you seek out church help is because all the assistance organizations for the homeless are non-profits and churches have cornered the non-profit game. They absolutely own the charity landscape at this point. Almost every local food pantry in my area is run by a church. Not only do churches tend to be run by people hwo are trained very well in running organizations and non-profits, but they usually have a buuuuuuunch of volunteers available who are very happy to help in their community. If I had made a personal rule that I would not go to any religious organizations for assistance in my plight, I'd probably be dead by now. Religious organizations are almost the ENTIRE assistance landscape. If they're not running the organizations they're assisting in partnership or they've started a separate non-profit just for community assistance that they contribute to with member donations.

Alright, once you've gotten what you can out of church-based charities or you've been unable to get assistance from them (I'm sorry), what else is there? How do you wait it out? Where do you wait it out? What do you do? Well, the answer is: don't get caught being homeless and don't be seen being homeless. Blend. Need a place to stay for awhile that's indoors and air-conditioned? I walked around in an antique mall for about an hour last weekend just for a place to be in the shade. Find a place where it's okay to browse. If you've got too many encumberments because you've got a big cart or suitcase, you're gonna need to solve the problem of stashing that somewhere people don't notice. This is the hard part: laying low and blending in as a housed member of society. And I only have so many tips here because I've been lucky enough to stay in a vehicle this whole time so I've had a place to stick my stuff when I go places. Some suggestions: if you can have a friend store your stuff or if you can afford a storage unit, or even convince a local organization to put your stuff in a back room, those are some options. Some shelters have lockers, but other shelters have rules about how much stuff you can even bring in.

So, this is where I had to learn some awful lessons and go through some hard stuff: you're probably gonna have to get rid of a lot of stuff because you can't carry it or can't afford to store it. Pawn what you can. But overall you're just gonna have to... well, you're just gonna have to make some choices. I used to have a huge book collection. I used to have a huge DVD and CD collection. I used to have a bunch of art and craft supplies. I had an antique glass collection and specialty collectable figurines. I don't have hardly any of that stuff anymore. I had to leave it behind in the apartment we got evicted from. I had to choose, out of the several rooms' worth of stuff I had, what out of it could fit in two boxes, and that's all I got to keep. And dude, I had family heirlooms. I don't have them anymore. I had to get real good at accepting the impermanence of all things and figuring out what was actually essential for life amongst all the things I owned. That dragon figurine was real pretty but it took up room that a can opener would fit in, and the can opener is way more important to my livelihood. So I have the can opener now and not the dragon figurine. That was the choice I had to make.

You will need, along the way, to talk to someone about how messed up this is. Social workers are great for this. Hotlines, chats, even a Reddit. Try to get some one on one time with someone who can listen to your experiences empathetically. It will make you more able to handle life. It will increase resilience. And as you talk about your plight you might get suggestions from them or information that you didn't have or didn't think about. It sucks to tell someone how bad it's been and where you really are right now but it helps you accept the reality of your situation, face it, and take as much control of it as you can.

If you feel like you haven't had much privacy in ages then keep an eye out in grocery stores and other shops for single-stall bathrooms that you can lock and maybe stay in for fifteen minutes to clean up and just be away from people for a little bit. Single-stall bathrooms usually have a wall socket you can plug in things to charge for a bit too. This is a good place to shave and such if you can make it quick. If you do this try to be discreet and look like you're browsing through the store before and after using the bathroom. If there's groceries and you have food stamps/SNAP benefits and they accept those, go ahead and get yourself stuff there if it's in-budget. Organic/whole food/natural grocery stores are good for this--if they have higher-end clientele there's a good chance they have nicer facilities. If there's nothing single-stall they'll at least probably have a water bottle fill station. Just look a bit tidied up. Don't wear stuff that makes it look like you're shoplifting and don't skulk about. If you're actually shoplifting there I'm not gonna judge you but keep yourself safe and stay discreet for your own sake. Don't ruin a good refuge for yourself.

By the way if you're looking for soda, convenience stores are often very expensive now when it comes to that. Dollar Tree and other similar stores are a better place to get cokes and stuff. If you're in a state where they do bottle deposit refunds you can even make a little profit off of this. I've gotten soda for a dollar or more cheaper than other places at Dollar Tree. They can stock up pretty irregularly so be prepared for inconsistency and grab things when you see them there. Also, Dollar Tree is horrible for some items that they mark up severely, so only get the stuff there that makes sense for your budget and shop elsewhere for the items they've marked up too much for you.

Orion is in the sky because this is an Orion craft.

Hey all. There has been stuff happening and there have been homelessness-related things to write about, but my inspiration has been elsewhere--namely in fiction. I've been writing a lot of fiction while we've been hunkered down into the cold weather. It's a good mental escape and it doesn't use too much laptop battery up to run a word processor app.

But besides that, I've needed to take a break from writing this content because it makes me upset and angry, often enough, because talking about stuff that's happened to us while homeless has been upsetting and infuriating. Not only that, but because we were under so much mental and physical stress when experiencing stuff in December and January especially, it's hard to actually put it all in order. It's hard to write about. So someday I will report on the experience of eating Christmas dinner in the Portland Art Museum with my husband, but probably not this month. It was a good experience but also mentally complicated.

I'd also like to write up some recipes for what we've been eating, since we've been without a kitchen and much of any cooking equipment for quite some time. Yet, we've actually been eating pretty well with some judicious use of groceries and some good planning. It's just a lot of effort, man. Everything is a lot of effort when it's so cold. And when I get tired I just want to write about the time travel guy who keeps getting into trouble, and see whether he gets out of trouble anytime soon.

As for what's next, we're waiting for some appointments to see if we can get some more housing options that would work for our situation. The goal is that we and our cats stop living in a car and start living in a residence. A lot of what we do every day is wait, to be honest, since services we need are often available for limited time windows so we are often trying to figure out the schedule for a food pantry, a clothing closet, and free social support services, and then figure out how we can get to all of those things and also fit it into a bus schedule. It can be a lot of effort just to plan our day! So if you drop a tip into the tip jar it is very helpful, because often it means we can buy dinner instead of having to figure out A Dinner-Making Method, or we can go to a nearby cafe and be warm and recharge devices when it's a rainy night.

I'm hoping for some more news sometime in March, after some stuff starts up that we've been waiting for. Until then, we're faithfully yours, guarding the church parking lot from... oppression? Litter? Magical portals? IDK we're homeless, man, don't demand too much of us.