It's a sad, sad, world

Dot: you know who else is beautiful?

Jimmy: meep

Her sympathy moved him – the only people who understood his frustrations were those alike to him. Very rarely anyone who happened to be… Well, NORMAL.

“ It’s jus’ how it is, ” he explains with a shrug of his broad shoulders, “I mean, sure, it’s unfair and wrong. But there ain’t nothin’ we can do to change it. ”

He clears his throat, slipping the gloves back onto his hands. “ Believe me, I’ve tried. ”

“Well the least I can do is make up for the day,” Dot insisted. Then an idea struck her. “I know a place,” she told him as she hopped on the motorbike.

There is visible anger in Dot’s face as they exit the building, and he sighs; a small chuckle making it’s way out from his chest.

“ Don’t worry ‘bout it, Dot, ” he turns to her, giving her delicate hand a gentle squeeze as he reassures her. “ I’d be lyin’ if I said I wasn’t used to it. Doesn’t make it any less wrong of ‘em, but it don’t P H A S E me anymore. ”

“It’s still not right,” she told him, her face soften in front of him. “You should be able to go anywhere you please without someone making a fuss.”

He looks at her, brows lifting, and he chuckles. “ If there’s one think ya need to know ‘bout me, it’s that I don’t go dutch, doll, ” he smirks, reaching for the wallet in his back pocket. He pulls it out, tossing a few coins onto the granite counter top before standing on his feet once more.

His gloves fall from his lap as he stands, forgetting he had placed them there; and he bends to retrieve them – but not before the coming waitress notices his unusual hands.

“ Oh, God, ” she stutters, eyes going wide, nose crinkling with disgust as she stares at his deformity. “ You’re one of those F R E A K S!”

“ Let’s go, doll, ”he quips hurriedly, turning to Dot. “ Service here STINKS, anyway. ”

Dot just smiled, he really was a gentleman. But as soon as they got up and Jimmy reached for his hands...that was when the real reaction began. They were staring at him, making Dot’s blood boil. She stood right with him, her hand in his and walked out. But not without turning to say her piece to the waitress.

 “Anyone who flirts with a man who is clearly on a date is clearly a loose woman.” With that she walked off with Jimmy, not ashamed in the slightest holding his hand.

“ Oh, yeah, ” he agrees, “ Definitely. I’ve been performin’ for 14 years, an’ I STILL get the heebie jeebies. ”

He takes a gulp of his soda again before looking at her with a smirk. “ I sing too, y’know. Not as well as YOU, I’m sure! ”

“Oh no, I doubt that,” Dot said with a small smile. “Compared to the both of us you had to have more training then I have. Mine is just...when I’m alone and the radio isn’t working.” She finished her food, sipping on her soda one last time.

Her reach for her burger reminds him of the half-eaten sandwich in front of him, and he turns his torso as he picks it up, taking another bite.

“ I mean, I juggle, that counts for somethin’, right? ” he chuckles. “ I dunno, actually. I don’t do much besides rehearse an’ perform. What about you? ”

“Well...I do kind of sing,” she admitted. “Not a lot...not like my sister Bette. I love her, I truly do. But she couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket.” She confessed, it was sort of refreshing to say it aloud without hurting her sister.

He is almost taken back by the girl’s encouraging and thoughtful words; and as she places her hand into his, he smiles nervously – giving it a little squeeze.

“ I, uh, ” he stutters, eyes becoming hooded as he clears his throat, “…Thank you. ”

“You’re welcome,” she replied, still holding his hand. “Told you I wasn’t going anywhere,” she reminded him before gently letting go and took a bite of her burger.

He listens intently to her words, offering a smile at her encouraging direction. “ I’ve been tryin’. I tried to talk to my ma ‘bout takin’ off and havin’ a life of our own. But she always says, Jimmy, our life was never our own. ”

He takes a sip of his Coca-Cola and clears his throat again. “ Sometimes I jus’ think I’m meant to stay a FREAK forever. ”

“That’s not true Jimmy,” Dot reached out to grab a hold of his hand. “You are not a freak, you are a person. 

He pulled the newspaper in front of him as he read the front page. It was always nice not to find themselves in the newspaper like they had so many years ago.  Freak Show plastered in the middle of the newspaper, or even at times, calling out something one of them did would wind up on the front page.  Juniper was so quiet, the drama the newspaper seeked was always so trivial, but it brought a strur to the neighborhoods for weeks.

Hearing they had finish making breakfast, Jimmy closed the paper, as he pushed it to the side, as he looked up to the girls, watching as they placed his plate in front of him, waiting as they returned back to the table with food in front of them.  Looking at them from across the table, he couldn’t help but smile.  This was more amazing than he had ever imagined.

Picking up his fork had been difficult at first, learning the trials and errors of learning to deal with prosthetic were never a easy conquer, but in time, he had relearned, just as he had with his hands he was born with.

The girls watched as he ate, feeling their pride beam up. They helped him every step of the way just as he helped them. With his prosthetics, he was sort of limited, but they were patient and understanding. And soon he was back to his old self again. Yes, they had lost so much...but they gained much more. It was a new life, a new world. They took a bite themselves, they must admit...they did a pretty good job with the breakfast.

“ Boy, have I, ” he laughed, wiping his hands on his jeans – a bad habit of his. “ It’s all I ever think about. I’d give anything to, y’know, ” he pauses, wisely choosing his next words, “ Have a normal life. ”

He avoids eye contact with the brunette, the subject making him fidgety. He takes another bite, visibly relieved that he didn’t have to struggle with those horrid gloves. “ If I had the chance, I’d run off, start a new life. Leave all this behind. I’d take my friends with me, o’course, but.. I dunno. ”

“I understand that more than anyone,” Dot replied. “That’s why me and Bette came here, to start fresh. Back in Alabama we were living with our mother. She was...a hard woman to deal with. And poor Bette she was so dependent, I had to find a way to make some kind of money so we could at least have something to go with while we drove away.

“ Well, to be honest, we haven’t really done a lot of travelin’, ” he informed, furrowing his brow in thought. “ I mean, when Elsa first started the show, it was a lil’ hectic. We went to Ohio, that was where I started performin’ for the first time, when I was eighteen. An’ we moved camp to Wisconsin once, that was fun. But we got stuck there all winter, ” he laughed. “ An’ it wasn’t so fun anymore. ”

He tried to take another bite of his sandwich, but his mitts prevented a perfect execution; so he becomes frustrated, looking around him quickly for a moment before slipping them off and placing them on his lap. He would be discreet, as not to draw attention to his odd hands.

“So uh, ” he continues, now biting into his BLT with ease, “ We eventually settled in Jupiter, an’ we’ve been here ever since. If people wanna see us, they come to us. ” 

Dot was relieved when she saw him take those awful gloves off. She knew he was having trouble, plus it looked odd a guy trying to eat with leather gloves. If people wanted to start, let them. Dot would shoot them down in a heartbeat. No one should feel discomfort as far as she was concerned. 

“ Oh, yeah, ” he smirks, making sure that his dark orbs wouldn’t even glance in the direction of the winking waitress, who placed the plate of food in front of the hungry Lobster Boy.

“ I mean, it’s INTERESTING, that’s for sure, ” he laughs, mindlessly struggling to pick up his sandwich with his heavy gloves. He brings his attention to the food in his hands for a moment, re-adjusting his grip on it. He returns his grinning expression to Dot after taking a bite, licking his lips before speaking.

“ Y’get to meet a lot of people. Some of ‘em are real cool, ” he pauses to swallow. “ But others aren’t so accepting, y’know?”

“Oh I get that, like that night? Those two other people were so rude!” Dot explained. “Bette was smitten with the boy but...there was something wrong with him.” She pointed out, taking a bite of her own burger. 

Though...in all honesty as hard as she tried to not look like some animal eating a burger she was not successful. Dot had to laugh though, now it was her looking awkward. “So much for trying to look like a lady,” she joked, taking a napkin to dab her face.

It had all seemed like a blur up to this point, more so an incomplete blur.  Jimmy believed his life was set at the grounds of the freak show, that it was his highest potential, yet he stilled seemed to yearn for an escape, as it never seemed to satisfy him fully. He never regretted where he came from, it made him who he was. In fact if it wasn’t for the freak show, and the loss of so many, he might of never met Bette and Dot, the two woman who saved his life in the end.

Feeling his first son kick against their stomach, a grin formed on his lips.  The pregnancy was something Jimmy was scared of, unsure if Bette and Dot should carry his offspring to full term, in a fear of problems, but with reassurance, they were nothing but normal like any other woman pregnant.  But Jimmy still worried, as he waited hand and foot on them, not straying away as his father had.

They were cooking, something he loved to see and do.  The twins always seemed to tackle things, even if they weren’t too confident in the matter.  He loved it about them.  “How could I say no?” he grinned, as he stepped back.  Pouring himself a cup of coffee, he sat down at the kitchen table, taking the dark liquid to his lips.

“Well it should be almost done,” Dot told him, a smile on both their faces. Oh how they loved him so. He was the perfect husband and the perfect to be father. Who could say their husband actually went out of his way to make sure they were comfortable and safe? Even now, sitting there enjoying his coffee while they cooked. In their own home, a life of their own. It was a far cry from where they came from. But the twins never regretted it, not one bit.

 They never would have met Jimmy, found true love and create a little family of their own. Soon the food was done, they taking the plate and placing it in front of him. “Breakfast is done honey,” Bette smiled, both girls kissing a cheek from his face. They made a plate for themselves, sitting down close to him...though they had a slight wobble. 

“ I don’t expect ya to understand, ” he shook his head, and he gently placed a hand on her knee. “ I mean, if you made eyes with some fella I’d be pretty miffed, too. ”

 Her claim of acceptance puts him at ease, and a shy smirk crosses his lips. He nods, looking away from the girl’s gentle expression. “ First date I’ve been on in a while, ” he explains with a chuckle, “ I gotta get my shit together. ”

“Trust me, I have not looked at another boy until you came on that stage that night.” She confessed to him. “And hey, first dates are suppose to be awkward. Or at least I am told.” The waitress came back, obviously still in her flirting mode.

“ Look, Dot, I-I didn’t mean – I don’t wanna hurt you, ” he stammers, taking his clumsy hands and placing them lightly on her shoulders. “ I just… ”

He sighs. How was she going to understand where he was coming from? Sure, she may have been an outcast all her life, but to have a deformity like his was something nobody could know the burden of. He was molded and shaped to fit into the only lifestyle that could work for someone of his condition; and he tended to gravitate towards certain vices in order to replace some of the normality. And for reasons unbeknownst to Jimmy, most of those vices happened to be girls.

“ I’m just… Not used to bein’ with a girl, y’know? ” he explained, his cheeks becoming a bit flushed as he looks away from the hurt brunette. “ I’ve always been playin’ the field. Girls don’t stick around me too often. I’m used to seein’ an opportunity and takin’ it. That’s how it is when you… ” He pauses, taking a moment to gather the right words. “ …When you grow up like I did. Y’know? ”

Dot looked at him, her heart felt for him. Now that she thought about it...she had no clue what he had gone through. Sure she was a wallflower, but what Jimmy had gone through was so much more. He was born with a medical condition, something he could not control. And yet he was brought up to be gawked at, he had to wear gloves in order to fit in “normal” society. 

She then thought, what would happen if he had the gloves off, the stares. That blonde waitress would look at him like he was some creature. That made her madder, more ar herself that she didn’t understand.

The young man turned to his date, his eyes wide with guilt as he hears her soft words; and he slaps a hand to his forehead, running it up and through his disheveled hair.

“ Jeez, Dot, I-I didn’t mean that, you gotta understand- ”

He sighed, cutting himself off. “ I didn’t even realize I was doin’ it. She means nothin’ to me, just a pretty face is all. ”

He ran a gloved palm through his hair again, sure that he was only making it worse for himself. He wouldn’t blame her if she just got up and left – what a way to start a date.

“Then what am I?” The question was instant. He looked guilty...she knew that much. And she should just brush it aside, it was only just one thing. But the small voice soon returned. The voice that told her he was no different than the rest of the men she encountered. But she wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt...she had to.