I have great news to share...
I HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN TO EXPERIENCE CARDIO FANTASIES IRL!!!!! I've broken through.
I'm still in disbelief tbh. I'll give y'all the story below if you're interested.
TLDR: NSFW - My husband and I made love last night for the first time in over a year. And it was with a stethoscope.
Read on if you want the details, it's not too graphic but I mostly wanted to write this out to relive it all, and ofc share with those who may enjoy. :)
My marriage has been on the rocks for a long time. I do not live together with my husband. But we are still close and have been spending time together as friends.
Even before separating, we went the last year without any sexual contact. Lots of reasons, but frankly I was just not interested.
He is fully aware about my fetish. I opened up to him about it in the past, it just never really manifested anything in the bedroom, because I was too embarrassed to do anything lol. but it comes up in other ways.
I just bought a manual blood pressure cuff and new stethoscope to learn how to take my own bp. The automatic machines at the doctor always cause pain and give me a super high reading, while a manual taken right after would be normal and painless... With me already having a phobia of healthcare and some health anxiety, this has led to a handful of traumatizing experiences at the doctor, severely exacerbating my phobia, regressing all progress I had made with it, and DEBILITATING me with health anxiety.
It just so happened to work out that I received the steth (I splurged on a new littmann 😏) and cuff while he was over at my place. I had a couple drinks in me so was feeling rather carefree.
When we went to bed, I asked if I could practice blood pressure on him.
We tried for a bit, (which was fucking hot in itself) but were struggling with the bulb inflating right, and gave up.
So I was like..."let me make sure this wasnt the problem", gave him a playful side eye and put the earpieces in my ears.
He said ohhh okay, and I put the steth on his heart (which has my name tatted on it 🤪) I listed for a good couple minutes, then stopped and said "yeah, I think it works."
He replied "it works? oh good", and I said "yeah, you can try for yourself if you want", and gestured at the steth lying on the bed.
At first he said, "I believe you." ....(cue my quiet disappointment 😞)
But a few seconds later, he sat up and said "actually, I'll try it on you" (CUE HAPPINESS 🫠)
He put in the earpieces and placed the bell on my chest, at first he said he couldn't hear anything. He messed with placement for a bit, and then placed it on his own chest (Its a fucking tsunami in my pants at this point ,jfc), said "I cant hear anything on myself either", then back to mine.
I asked if the earpieces were in the wrong way? So he flipped them around and tried listening to me again, and then quickly said "yeah that was it". I said "do you hear anything now?" and he just nodded his head yes and closed his eyes.
He listened for a few moments, and then kissed me. Then he started kissing me up and down slowly and gently, still listening... I was running my fingers through his hair, and around his back and shoulders, and questioning whether this was real life right now.
He continued listening and kissing on me, and his hands made their way into my shorts. I'm sure he could tell that I really enjoyed what was happening, because he is not one to push boundaries and can tell when I'm not into it, and literally this was the first time he touched me since before we separated. A year ago.
Well from there one thing led to another, he took off the steth and we had really great, passionate sex, I put it back on a couple times during to listen while he was on top of me.
After we finished, he said he liked it. I told him that him grabbing the steth was what turned me on... and he repeated that he really liked it. And I told him about more of my fantasies:) It was seriously fucking amazing. I haven't actually felt turned on like that in so long.
Unfortunately, looking at cardiophile stuff lately has been making me feel guilty because I already struggled with my sexuality since forever, and while discovering that my interest was also a fetish was sexually liberating at first, I was worried that it was becoming more of a limitation on me expressing myself confidently IRL.
But he knows. And he knew what to do. And I was genuinely so into it, fully comfortable and present in the moment, no apprehension or pretending, just feeling connected to him and having a part of myself that has never been externalized fully seen and understood for the first time ever. I am so beyond grateful for him.
If you read this far, you're a real one. thank you all for the existence of this supportive community.
so YESS, I am celebrating. So so happy that happened.
With love, strangefeeling
