Biryani
things nobody tells you about biryani until it's too late
okay so I need to talk about something that has been living rent-free in my head for three weeks now and it's the fact that biryani is genuinely, scientifically, philosophically impossible.
like. it should not work. let me explain.
you take raw rice. you take raw meat. you put them in the same pot at the same time. the rice needs water and high heat. the meat needs moisture and low heat. these are opposing conditions. they should produce either rubber chicken swimming in mushy rice OR perfectly cooked rice surrounding completely raw chicken.
and yet biryani comes out perfect. every time. when done right it's individually separate grains of rice, each one a tiny flavor bomb, wrapped around meat so tender it forgets what structure is. this defies logic. this defies cooking physics. the pot is doing something in there that science has not fully explained and I'm choosing to believe it's magic.
the thing about the pot sealing though —
okay so the traditional method is dum pukht, which literally translates to "breathed and suffocated" (poetic right??) and what you do is you seal the lid with dough. actual bread dough. you press it around the edge of the pot so NO steam escapes.
and then you put the pot on low heat for sometimes TWO HOURS.
the rice finishes cooking in the steam of the meat. the meat finishes cooking in the perfume of the rice. they make each other into something neither could be alone.
if that's not a metaphor for something I don't know what is. I'm not saying biryani is a metaphor for love. I'm just saying biryani is a metaphor for love.
a breakdown of the spice situation because people underestimate this:
whole cardamom pods — they don't get eaten, they're like little fragrance grenades that go off during cooking and leave ghost flavors in the rice
saffron soaked in warm milk — the fact that someone looked at these tiny dried threads and thought "yes I'll soak these in dairy and pour it on rice" and was RIGHT about it is one of history's greatest moments
fried onions — listen, the birista (crispy golden fried onions) that go on top of a biryani are not a garnish. they are a COMPONENT. they are a REASON. you eat them with the rice and they're sweet and caramelized and slightly crispy and slightly soft and they're doing more work than most main courses
kewra water / rosewater — floral water sprinkled on at the end. you can't really taste it. you would 100% notice if it was missing. this is biryani's little secret.
regional beef (no pun intended):
the thing that will start genuine arguments at dinner tables across south asia is asking which regional biryani is best. i have seen friendships tested. i have seen aunties get involved. here's a completely non-exhaustive and deliberately chaotic ranking of the discourse:
hyderabadi stans: our biryani has been made the same way since the nizams, the meat goes in raw and cooks inside the pot, it is AUTHENTIC and ORIGINAL
lucknowi defense squad: our biryani is REFINED, the meat is cooked first with care, it is DELICATE, we do not put raw things in pots and hope for the best like some kind of peasants
kolkata biryani people: quietly slides a potato onto your plate you: what— them: potato. you: in the biryani? them: ...yes. potato. [the potato is inexplicably perfect and you never question it again]
malabar biryani enthusiasts: everyone else is using the wrong rice. we have KAIMA rice. it is TINY and FRAGRANT and your basmati is doing too much.
sindhi biryani: we added dried plums and you're welcome
everyone is correct. everyone is wrong. all biryani is sacred.
okay but can we talk about the eating of it
biryani is ideally served with:
raita — which is yogurt with cucumber and sometimes mint and the coolness of it against the heat of the biryani is a sensory experience that I think about regularly
a wedge of lime that you squeeze over everything and it brightens the whole dish in a way that feels illegal
mirchi ka salan — a chili curry that sounds aggressive but is actually tangy and slightly sweet and it goes with biryani the way some things just GO together and you can't explain why
you eat biryani and you're not really hungry anymore but you keep eating because stopping feels like a moral failure. every extra spoonful is a decision you're making consciously and deliberately and you do not regret it.
the thing biryani does to time
making biryani from scratch takes a long time. the marination usually happens overnight. you wake up and there's this bowl in the fridge that smells like garlic and ginger and yogurt and spice and tomorrow is going to be good.
the frying of the onions takes like 45 minutes of standing at a stove stirring. you can't rush it. if you rush it they burn or they stay pale and either way they're not doing their job. this is meditation. this is being present. this is your phone staying on the counter because you cannot look away from onions.
and then the dum — the sealed pot, the low fire, the waiting. you have to trust the process. you have to leave the pot alone. you cannot lift the lid to check. the lifting of the lid releases the steam and the steam is the WHOLE POINT.
biryani teaches you patience in a way that I think a lot of us genuinely need.
the midnight biryani phenomenon
if you grew up in a south asian household you know about midnight biryani. this is when someone made biryani yesterday, it's now 1am, and you are standing in the kitchen in the dark eating it cold, directly from the pot, with a spoon.
cold leftover biryani is a different food. I will die on this hill. the spices have had time to mature. the rice has absorbed everything it's ever going to absorb. the meat is softer. the flavors are rounder.
it hits differently at 1am in the dark. it always does.
one last thing
biryani is not fast food. it is not weeknight dinner unless someone loves you enough to spend their weekend making it. it is not something you throw together. it is effort made visible. it is hours of someone's time presented to you in a pot and the least you can do is eat it slowly and pay attention.
when someone makes you biryani from scratch, they are saying something. listen.
#biryani #food #south asian food #cooking #food history #I just really love biryani okay #this got long #food culture #dum pukht #hyderabadi #lucknowi #the potato debate continues
