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Your guilt and shame cannot hide you anymore, Christ refuses to lose you again. You might as well hide in the comfort of His love, because it’s the only place to find restoration and renewal.

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July 18, 2015 - 8 pm.
We had a family meeting. This is not a democracy, but a dictatorship.  Memery, Daniel, Rachel, Nathan, Ty, Me and Liam. How do I want this house to run? How do I want them to behave?  Nathan expressed to Ty how he wants him to grow up. This was a good family meeting, but very hard on Ty. Later, Nathan said to Rachel and me specifically, “L has no phase on you except whatever you give him, not either of you.” That meant a lot to me. Privately, Ty apologized to me sincerely and he is sorry for how he treated D. He wants to stay here. I said yes.
July 15, 2015 - 1 am
I want a snapshot of each of these beautiful people in my life- - Now. Â I do not want to forget. Â I have that feeling in my chest, aching, sure of change on the horizon. Â More than usual tonight. Â Â
Nathan is an awesome dad, becoming an amazing man, he is tattooing and quite an artist. . Daniel B is here and making a new start. Memery has reconciled with her other two sons just this week and has a new love, Tommy. Rae was engaged and now back home: stressed out in CNA class and hoping to get into nursing school; wants to leave this full house.   Liam is four and a half and amazing. Nayeli is three and a half and beautiful, she calls me “My Gamma”. Her brother, Zaul, is here with Liam and Nelly tonight - quiet and sleeping. Brandon is in town, just today, and hasn’t talked to me yet. He is with his brothers and cousin and sister at Nate’s friends house, partying around a campfire. I am happy for them! Tonight, for the first time in over three years, Rae went to L’s house and she was hugged for a long time, she was told he loves her, and she felt wanted. She met Lisa tonight; Liam calls her “LaLa”.  Liam is growing so quickly- but he is tired in this full house. Memery and I are best of friends- So blessed to be sisters. Nathan and I love these kids and this sharing of life.  We have a backyard full of toys, two rottweilers BooBoo and Yogi, and Addy- my Aussie. Ty is going through a separation from Cheressa; he has to decide what kind of man to be. He wrecked my car- - then offended my mechanic.  I am facing my two year anniversary working for Chuck- General Construction: a series of problems to solve. I am very separated from my friends. Margaret is in Kansas, Novella and Debbie in Wyoming, they are all very-married. I am not. My dad is recently ill, may be nearing end-of-life. My brother Danny and his wife Susan live in M. and his friends Don and D take care of me and my cars.  I miss my mom, and my grandma.Â
 I know, now, everything will change. Â