ICARAEous BLOGerous

My new album Undertow is releasing soon to all the major streaming platforms. I've been working on this album for over a year and I'm pretty happy with how it turned out. The main theme running throughout the album is apacalyptic climate change and how humanity seems to be becoming less...human. There are multiple love songs dedicated to my husband and several of the songs reflect on my sobriety and how that journey nearly killed me.

I'd be super stoked if you liked this post and shared it with your followers. It's not easy for indie artists to break through the noise anymore and with most major streaming platforms being inundated with tens of thousands of new shitty AI songs everyday it's become even harder to find my people.

I'm trusting that the algorithm will help me find my fellow weirdos who like teiphoppy progressive house music with dramatic themes.

Here's my hyper follow/pre-save link for Spotify

Or do we like color better? I always think I look better in black and white.

Farmer Icarae, 38 years old

Releasing my new album soon. Presave it now on Spotify.

Be holy. Be holy. Be holy.

Bow before Queen Gidget human peasants!

Meet our fluffy monster, Guts!

He's got a serious case of orange cat syndrome. 🤣 He's such a cuddle bug. My hubby and I are always getting all the cuddles. He has a corner of the couch he's always snoozing in. At the end of the day we usually sit down to watch some TV together and after Guts wakes up he plays favorites and picks one of us to come cuddle up to.

Here's his mama, Gidget:

I've had her since she was a kitten. My late grandmother rescued her from our backyard where a stray had had a litter of kitties. Most of them died in the frigid NW Missouri winter.

This is my cover of Man or a Monster by Sam Tinnesz

“I don’t need your light just to get by.” 🌊🔥

For a long time, I thought love was something you had to chase into the stars, even if it meant getting lost in the debris. But this song is about the moment the chase ends. It’s about realizing that the "ideal" we were promised isn't coming, and instead of mourning it, we’re choosing to breathe on the shore.

Accepting what life gives you isn’t a defeat; it’s an anchor. It’s finding a different kind of fire, a Veridian fire, that burns even when the other person’s voice goes quiet.

Stopped chasing your orbit, I'm finally free... I found my anchor in the Veridian Sea.

I joined Twitter way back in August of 2008. For the longest time, I used my account as a sounding board for ideas I had when I owned my small graphic design shop. I posted aimlessly and without any real expectation of gaining any followers because I didn't really know how to use the "micro-blogging" platform. Several months ago I changed my username to reflect my musician moniker, Icarae. Then I started methodically releasing my music. I posted it on X first to build some excitement, then posted it to SoundCloud, using their Artist Pro tools to have the algorithm suggest it to people who listened to like music. I was shocked at how quickly and well my music was perceived in exactly the way I had hoped it to be. Inspiring and empowering. All of my songs focus on person growth and resilience. Something I have always struggled with.

But lately, X has felt less like a digital town square and more like a courtroom where the jury has already decided you’re guilty of being human.

Recently, I shared some of the biggest news of my life. I signed a deal with a major label for my music. This was the culmination of a decade of hard work, of writing music in the shadows, and finally finding the courage to step out. But hours after the announcement, a "curious" stranger decided to play detective. They found a mugshot from a DUI I had seven years ago and over 100 lbs ago.

Do people honestly think a person cannot completely change their life in nearly a decade?

I worked tirelessly to battle my demons. I lost the weight, I gained muscle, I addressed my mental health, and I found the right path for me. I have never hidden from my mistakes. I have always been open about where I came from. Yet, my past was weaponized against me as if I were a fraud. It was as if the person I am today is somehow invalidated by the person I was once trying to survive being.

I don’t have the mental energy to do battle with people who think they’re superior because they know how to use Google. I’m done giving strangers the opportunity to write my review for me.

So, I deleted it all. I removed my music from SoundCloud and YouTube. I’ll let the label handle the releases on their own terms from here on out. I’m reclaiming my peace. I’m coming back to Tumblr after years away because this has always been a space where individuality and growth are actually celebrated, not used as ammunition.

I’m uploading the MP3 for my song "Unshaken" below. It is deeply ironic to me that I wrote these lyrics long before this week happened:

I felt the sting, yeah, that's what's true, But a scar is just a view, not the whole of you. I won't ride the rush when the crowd gets loud, I won't hide away when the lightning strikes. Lucid, unshaken, cool, and slow, I only live in the truth that I know.