The Perfectionist

- DON'T say to yourself "I need to take a shower"

-showering is a long multistage process that requires you to be vulnerable (naked, wet, blots out sound, what if someone calls/rings the doorbell, etc)

-INSTEAD say to yourself "I'm just gonna go turn on the water right quick"

-small one step task checked off your list

-your anxiety brain is a dumb motherfucker and it will be none the wiser that you have tricked it into BEGINNING the shower process

-once the water is running you are already there in the bathroom with the water running so you might as well finish the job

NOTE that this trick works for like. Fucking everything.

-Don't "work on your WIP"-- just open the document

-don't "make the scary phone call" -- just pull up the number in your contacts

-don't "make lunch" -- just pull out a loaf of bread

-don't "do the dishes" -- just open the dishwasher. Literally just open it

Remember ur anxiety brain is a dumb motherfucker and that you CAN therefore TRICK it into being functional

also bonus tip: for those times when u just need to lie on the floor and be a worthless lump of anxiety-ridden garbage for a few hours, download Duolingo and pick a language. Are you going to be fluent in a week? No. But it's easy to focus on and that way when you've been down there for half a day and your shitty fukken brain is trying to convince you you're garbage because it KEPT you there, you can counter with "excuse you I just spent the last four hours TEACHING MYSELF A FOREIGN LANGUAGE you punk ass bitch."