i have nothing left to prove.

   at least this world was easier to manage; it had taken some getting used to at first, of course, but the longer he stays in vraelgard, the more he wonders if anything that had happened to him before had ever happened at all. there was no clue at all that the organization had ever existed, or that any of that horrid game had ever taken place. sou could believe that he had a different life before being swept to a new world ( well, it was still a bit difficult to truly believe, but equally hard to deny ); but being kidnapped for a death game?

   he didn’t want to believe it.

   but he couldn’t avoid the outside forever, even if he wasn’t feeling well. especially if he wasn’t feeling well; he probably needed to get some medicine before it got worse. he shuffled out the door as quick as he could, still trying to avoid as much contact as possible with his “roommates”, and when outside he leaned against the door with a sigh. he shouldn’t need a quick breather with that short a jaunt to the door, but that just meant he really did need to go get this medicine. after a few moments passed he finally gathered the energy to push himself off the door — and almost immediately right into another person. 

   ‘ oh, sorry— ’ sou starts muttering, but his words are cut short when he recognizes the boy in front of him.

   ‘ joe… ? ’

   there’s a dull pain as sou immediately stumbles back into the wall and hits hard, too hard for a small frame like his. it’s weird; he didn’t feel that sick, but clearly something was very wrong. there were so many reasons joe couldn’t be here— but, if somehow he was, then—

   no.

   right. either it’s not joe or he’s… hallucinating. neither are great signs, but he has time to dwell on that after he gets out of this situation. sou pushes himself off the wall again, somehow with even less energy than the first time, but ends up stumbling and struggling to catch himself on the opposite wall instead. what the hell was going on..?

   ‘ sorry, I… I have to go… ’ 

whoopsie doopsie I’m late to this — I’m vi! 26 years old, she/her pronouns. I’m very very late at everything, I drink coffee like it’s going out of style, and I’m always trying to do about five things at once. keyword here being try. I’ll also add another to the ffxiv gang ( though lately I’ve been mia because of ffviir and acnh, because of course ), and ff in general. feel free to hit up my twitter or discord !

this blog is gonna have immense amounts of spoilers for the game your turn to die ( which you can play here! ) up to the end of chapter 2, though it does reference some info learned in chapter 3. also there’s might be talk of death, murder, guns, general violence, hallucinations, suicide, stalking, kidnapping... the whole lot. I will tag all of these things, but tread with care!

and now the good stuff. 

20+ years old. the mystery of ‘why’ continues.

seems rather timid but friendly at first.

currently going through a crisis of being kidnapped and forced into a death scenario

his personality and emotional state have gone through severe whiplash at least twice. handle with care.

he’s just a twink without a friend, though. he doesn’t know what the word means.

really, he doesn’t. his last friend was unhot Garbage and then he Died.

[strums guitar] green hair

  THIS SUCKS. Joe’s really feeling the itch to wig out right now, fingers flexing into fists and wanting to move, but ultimately being unable to.

  His first plan of action though? Dropping into a crouch, throwing his hands over his head, and hoping his fear isn’t any more obvious when he pushes his face into his knees.

   He watches Joe drop and immediately his own body relaxes. It took a bit longer than Sou had thought, but he’s quick to reclaim the ground he lost in keeping his pretense, taking delicate steps until he’s right in front of the boy trying to hide away from an imagined fear. Sou takes a deep, quiet breath, leans forward until he’s right beside Joe’s ear, and whispers,

  Oh. Oh, he does not like that. In fact, he kind of super hates this. A cold sweat breaks out on his neck and he laughs, shaky at best. “ Nothin’. Nothin’ is behind me! ”

  A beat of silence.

  “ What’s behind me, Sou? ”

   ❛ N-No... it can’t be... ❜ Another trembling step back as Sou keeps his gaze fixed past Joe. He starts to draw in shaky breaths to fill the space where words fail.

  He isn’t sorry, there’s no way he’s genuinely apologetic. Joe nearly pouts, settling for frowning and folding his arms. “ Isn’t it a natural reaction to reject wrong assumptions?! I don’t think I’m acting strange at all! ”

❛ ... ❜

❛ Yeah, I guess you’re right. But then— ❜

Sou’s words are cut short as his stare is pulled to a space just behind Joe. The teasing smile quickly melts away, and the man takes an unsteady step back.

  “ That’s being Sonobeno’s local Samurai Woman for ya! ” A pause and he squints. “ … I don’t like that pause or the implication. Have you ever even seen me act scared by little things? ”

   But this was a second chance at finally getting the information they had all sought before. Nevermind that logic told Sou it wasn’t necessary anymore, constantly reassuring him that he was finally free, because he couldn’t really believe that. Not when something still yet unknown had brought them here; not when that unknown could still bring them all back.

   Nevermind that the homemaker probably didn’t know much more than he at this point. If the note from the laptop was to be believed, Sou actually knew more about the game — but he wasn’t really sure it was something he could believe.

   ( Nevermind that the two of them hadn’t parted on the best of terms; for once, Sou’s lies had paved an escape for him, and he musters all the energy of the frail and innocent man that the other participants had thought him to be, one who was just unfortunate enough to be caught alone with the laptop at the wrong time. )

   His hand rubs gently at the back of his head, fingers gently brushing against the sore spot that had long since healed. Maybe Sou could sweep the antagonism aside for the cause, but he didn’t have enough of a read on Kai to know if he would do the same.

   Not that any of that mattered. He shouldn’t know the culprit at this point, and regardless of his own feelings, Sou needed to keep his cover in front of Sara, in front of Joe — which means he needed to keep it in front of Kai as well. So he tucks away his frown and all his hesitation and picks up the pace to meet the homemaker once more.

   ❛ Kai…! Kai, is that you? ❜

  “ You didn’t get that impression before or anything? It’s not like I’m a scaredy-cat, I just… ” he says, vaguely gesturing. “ Y’know? ”

『You’re so kind, let me guess you have lots of friends. If this were a story in shonen jump you would be the main character that everyone rallies around with the power of friendship?』

Kumagawa immediately perked up from what looked like spiraling depression only a moment ago. The change was so sudden, it almost looked like the tears that had been welling up in the corners of his eyes were entirely fake. 

『Oh, never-mind I was wrong. You’re the dregs of society that’s better off thrown out.』

Kumagawa went from complimenting him to condescending him. His mood could change that easily, like the flip of a switch. His wide eyes narrowed as he observed Sou’s face as if he said that just to provoke him and watch his reaction. 

『Phew, that’s good. I tend to hate those main characters that everyone likes. Where do they get off, thinking they’re special just because they have friends and a success rate more than zero percent.』

   Sou’s eyes widen and shoot to the other boy at the sudden change, but it doesn’t take him long to catch up. It was foolish to think for even a second that he could let his guard down, even in this new place — but that was just how the world worked, wasn’t it? Even when there wasn’t the threat of being killed by others, people were always the same.

   ❛ Thrown out? Isn’t that a bit harsh…? ❜ He stares for just a little while longer, listening to the ramblings of the stranger ( and noting the tug of something familiar once again, but the image brought to mind wasn’t his own ) and holding back a wince when he mentioned success rates — it was just a coincidence, surely. Sou had no idea who this guy was, and he was certain he was unrelated to the death game.

   But still he finds his own expression smoothing over, the mask of Sou that he thought was no longer necessary settling in just as neatly as before with an empty smile. Unrelated or no, this guy wasn’t someone he should take lightly.

  Anyone else shoving their foot in their mouth when they talk? No? Damn. Joe gives Sou a sympathetic few pats on the shoulder as a silent apology before actively giving him a sheepish ‘sorry’ out-loud. There’s a nostalgic wave that passes over him with the reaction, a reminder of how Sou’s introduction went and he fights a rising snicker in his throat that could be mistaken as being towards the other.

  ( He wishes they all could’ve met under better circumstances. He wishes he wouldn’t have made a suggestion about a possible traitor so early. )

  Joe idly watches Sou go forward, throwing a look back towards the rink itself every few seconds. He’s antsy to get moving, to run himself ragged around the ice and then go back to his room (or Sara’s, maybe) and have a good night’s rest. Given the opportunity to have proper fun after all of that… 

  Well, who wouldn’t be excited?

  “ No worries! I’ll do my best as your teacher then! ” Joe proclaims, holding out his hands for Sou to take hold of. “ Let’s go take on the ice! ”

   Sou doesn’t react immediately, instead just staring at Joe, all smiles and sunshine and honest intentions. Not a moment before he was sure the boy was itching to skate circles around the place and leave him behind — not intentional, he was sure, but Joe was just that kind of guy, and he definitely had the right to leave the elder behind.

   ❛ I-Isn’t this kind of embarrassing? Like something you’d do with a little kid… ❜ The remark comes to mask the uncertainty that keeps him from taking the boy’s hands, though it wasn’t wrong. Sou should be used to being treated like this, and he really shouldn’t be surprised given his entrance on to the rink, but to hold on to Joe—

   So he takes a few defiant ( but still baby ) steps forward, if only to prove that he could do this without help, if only to avoid taking Joe’s hands in front of everyone here. Immediately he realizes how bad of an idea it was when he nearly falls; Sou throws out his hands to catch himself before the floor does. He just stands there for a moment, breathing a small sigh of relief ( not today, floor ) before looking up at what kept him from falling.

   He was gonna regret this, wasn’t he?