we're all gonna die...

i need to replace my car engine :^) more on that later because someone from my insurance should be helping me figure things out. its been a long two weeks.

(tl;dr -- severe anxiety, im not happy bc i started writing my muses in a way that fit what other people wanted, i'll remake when i feel like it)

yeah tbh this was gonna happen but like, When. i didn't realize how bad the stress related to this blog had gotten until i started having literal anxiety about logging on. I've been trying not to turn this into a long infodump so in short:

I kept trying to rewrite muses to other people's liking, and then i wasn't happy! i was writing in a way people wanted, making major rewrites and just feeling disconnected. also too much personal life stuff! i have like.. major fear of being stalked bc of prior Situations. it keeps stacking. too many bad friends. car issues, work issues. this is a hobby that currently, i'm not enjoying.

some of my current rp experiences (and i think the anxiety it's induced?) has intensified my obsessive compulsive tendencies and the wound care is not fun lol.

(tl;dr -- severe anxiety, im not happy bc i started writing my muses in a way that fit what other people wanted, i'll remake when i feel like it)

yeah tbh this was gonna happen but like, When. i didn't realize how bad the stress related to this blog had gotten until i started having literal anxiety about logging on. I've been trying not to turn this into a long infodump so in short:

I kept trying to rewrite muses to other people's liking, and then i wasn't happy! i was writing in a way people wanted, making major rewrites and just feeling disconnected. also too much personal life stuff! i have like.. major fear of being stalked bc of prior Situations. it keeps stacking. too many bad friends. car issues, work issues. this is a hobby that currently, i'm not enjoying.

some of my current rp experiences (and i think the anxiety it's induced?) has intensified my obsessive compulsive tendencies and the wound care is not fun lol.

i'm stupid, actually, and it's only my english class that's eight weeks (though i think the summer semester as a whole is shorter? everything else ends mid august but started in may, so i am sincerely not sure) GOOD NEWS. once english it out of the way, significanlty smaller workload and i'd have a litttle more free time? my brain has been super fried though and i haven't been able to do much.

i'm stupid, actually, and it's only my english class that's eight weeks (though i think the summer semester as a whole is shorter? everything else ends mid august but started in may, so i am sincerely not sure) GOOD NEWS. once english it out of the way, significanlty smaller workload and i'd have a litttle more free time? my brain has been super fried though and i haven't been able to do much.

i'm stupid, actually, and it's only my english class that's eight weeks (though i think the summer semester as a whole is shorter? everything else ends mid august but started in may, so i am sincerely not sure) GOOD NEWS. once english it out of the way, significanlty smaller workload and i'd have a litttle more free time? my brain has been super fried though and i haven't been able to do much.