kinktellectual thoughts: on abdl & shame
i’ve struggled a LOT with accepting this kink as a part of myself (still struggling tbh) there’s so much shame and guilt and disgust wrapped up in it that i’m just starting to get past.
but i was talking to one of my abdl friends the other day about how difficult and lonely it can be to have this fetish. and i often think about how much easier life would be if i didn’t have it. but even if i could wave a magic wand and make the abdl part of me disappear… i don’t think i want to.
living as an abdl person reminds me a lot of being queer. it’s not just about what gets me off, it’s a lens that affects the way i see the world. it has made me deeply introspective, allowing me to find parts of myself that many vanilla people will probably never have the opportunity to explore.
being little allows me comfort, safety, and a primal allowance to just be. i feel like im getting in touch with a pared back, soft, unapologetic part of myself. it’s like viewing the world through a soft, fuzzy lens. comforting and warm and honest. the most honest part of me maybe.
and the vulnerability that comes with opening up about this kink to other people who share it… is an intimacy unlike anything else. finally making friends in this community has made me realize that i am not alone (when i felt alone in this experience for so long). but to converse with other people who get it and who appreciate the nuances and the weirdness and silliness and wonderfulness of abdl has been life changing to say the least
this is… not an easy kink to have. it’s not easy to explain the feelings of little space or the vulnerability of wearing diapers, or the TRUST and the intimacy it takes to trust your CG. you can’t understand those things unless you already get it. the world is just not understanding or kind to people who have this kink. and i think shame might be something that never fully goes away (at least for me)
anyway i hope this resonates with someone and makes someone feel less alone. you’re NOT alone. you’re not the first person to feel really conflicting things about this kink, and that’s okay!!!!
dailybridgerton
theartofmadeline
gracieabrams
yousharknotpass
tangentwithtanner
areudirty
