again

burnt: 189 kcal

like, in high school it was mainly my PE teacher who'd worry about me every time he saw me during classes and asked if I'm okay, made comments about my weight loss etc and it motivated me so damn bad to lose even more, idk I just crave attention so bad and now as I'm at uni there's no one who'd care about me and I feel so lost & unmotivated

I feel like a total failure cuz it was my idea to go biking and we planned a nice trip and it quickly ended like this and she told our mum and she's gonna tell dad and yea theyll surely comment on it/make fun so yeah

I've ran out of green tea

I mean, what the duck do I do then? My life revolves around my ed, food, calories, working out, losing weight. I have no hobbies, no passions. I'm not able to get interested in things anymore, I have no goal in life, I don't know what I like, what I am like, who I want to be in the future, what job I want, nothing. I literally don't do anything besides scrolling thru (mainly ed parts of) social media, sleeping, working out, or just being, and what's even worse, I have no motivation to change it, I feel too tired to do it. I'm scared that when I reach my ugw, my life will become even more empty, I'll see no sense in anything so I'll just keep lowering it so that I'll 'have something to do', have something that will keep me motivated to still be alive, but this will eventually kill me.