I am flowing again. I have lost my fears, my anguishes. I have multiple desires, curiosities, interests. I can be everywhere. — Anaïs Nin
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@existencenotes
I am flowing again. I have lost my fears, my anguishes. I have multiple desires, curiosities, interests. I can be everywhere. — Anaïs Nin

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Polperro II (Cornwall) (1939) by Oskar Kokoschka
Transgress your body’s borders, shed your skin, embrace your monstrous flesh. Freed of the shackles of the vulnerable female body, I will be reborn as a woman who devours.
Rebecca Harkins-Cross, Monstrous Flesh: On Women’s Bodies in Horror
“The soul is silent. If it speaks at all it speaks in dreams.”
— Louise Gluck, from “Child Crying Out” featured in Poems: 1962 - 2020
“I am made and remade continually. Different people draw different words from me.”
— Virginia Woolf

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“The personal, if it is deep enough, becomes universal, mythical, symbolic; I never generalize, intellectualize. I see, I hear, I feel. These are my primitive instruments of discovery.”
— Anaïs Nin, from The Diary Of Anais Nin, Vol. 4: 1944-1947 (via violentwavesofemotion)
“You will never be able to experience everything. So, please, do poetical justice to your soul and simply experience yourself.”
— Albert Camus
I don't know what it is like to not have deep emotions. Even when I feel nothing, I feel it completely.
Sylvia Plath, The Unabridged Journals
“I am fully aware and in full possession of myself. […] I have no desire to be understood, admired, pitied, or even known;”
— Simone de Beauvoir, from Diary of a Philosophy Student: Volume 1, 1926-1927; August 6th, 1926
At night, books, talk, passion.
— Anaïs Nin, Henry and June: From the Unexpurgated Diary of Anaïs Nin

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“I must start to build again after this long period of anguish and despair. […] Keep silent—and have confidence in myself.”
— Albert Camus, from Notebooks 1935-1951; circa March 1936
“I take pleasure in my transformations. I look quiet and consistent, but few know how many women there are in me.”
— Anaïs Nin
I was not the woman who breaks into pieces under the blows of abandonment and absence, who goes mad, who dies. Only a few fragments had splintered off, for the rest I was well. I was whole, whole I would remain. To those who hurt me, I react giving back in kind. I am the queen of spades, I am the wasp that stings, I am the dark serpent. I am the invulnerable animal who passes through fire and is not burned.
Elena Ferrante, tr. by Ann Goldstein, from The Days of Abandonment
If I lived by the sea I would never be really sad. I get an immense sense of eternity and peace from the ocean. I can lose myself in staring at it hour after hour.
Sylvia Plath, The Letters of Sylvia Plath Volume I: 1940–1956 — Aurelia Schober Plath, 18th July 1951

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I feel I have wasted my life... and know far too little for a woman of twenty-seven years... I feel a dizzying pressure under my skin... I want to make a hole in everything and penetrate it deep. I want to reach the heart of the earth. My love lies in there, a place where seedlings turn green and roots meet one another and creation continues even in dis integration. I think it has always been this way in birth and then in death. I think my body is a temporary form. I want to reach its essence. I want to hang my heart like a ripe fruit on every branch of every tree.
Forugh Farrokhzad, from a letter to Ebrahim Golestan featured in Sin: Selected Poems of Forugh Farrokhzad
Our sense of agency, how much we feel in control, is defined by our relationship with our bodies and its rhythms: Our waking and sleeping and how we eat, sit, and walk define the contours of our days. In order to find our voice, we have to be in our bodies-able to breathe fully and able to access our inner sensations. This is the opposite of dissociation, of being "out of body" and making yourself disappear. It's also the opposite of depression, lying slumped in front of a screen that provides passive entertainment. Acting is an experience of using your body to take your place in life.
Bessel van der Kolk, The Body Keeps the Score