Katy

He needs mouse bites to live

once you learn about pseudoscience you're forever doomed to get angry when people talk about like. love languages or stockholm syndrome. but forced to stay quiet lest your lose your mind trying to correct millions of people

BMI IS FAKE. BMI MEANS JACK SHIT. I AM GRABBING Y'ALL BY THE SHOULDERS THIS METRIC IS COMPLETELY USELESS AND IT WAS MADE BY AN EUGENICIST

wine drunkkk. lords and ladies I don’t think it counts against my vow of chastity if I fuck my squire like it’s not even a big deal

thats actually so beautiful im in love with the shapes off trees and how clear of a picture i have of this place existing in nature

the sign in button?

a guy shoots at me with a sniper rifle and I catch the bullet in my teeth and eat it, but he saw that coming and put poison in the bullet, but I saw that coming and drank an antidote ahead of time, but all those weird chemicals still give me a really bad kidney stone a few days later and I pass out from pain and crash my car into, by pure coincidence, the sniper

It’s that time of year again so here is your yearly reminder that the world isn’t ending and people don’t hate you. The sun is just setting at 6 pm.

Please take your vitamin D

i just woke up from a dream where i was being interrogated by a bunch of people asking me if “furbies are kosher” firstly…. im not jewish. secondly……..what the fuck

please stop sending me asks pertaining to the kosher status of furbies. i really do not know. this was just a manifestation of my subconscious. im assuming that they are not kosher because furbies aren’t even food. but who knows! ask a rabbi, if you must. 

Jew here! Furbies are actually worse than unkosher–they are not permissible as food, even for gentiles. This is because the Torah teaches that it is forbidden for any human to eat the meat of an animal that is still alive, and the Furby cannot die.

hi this is the most ominous description of a furby i have ever heard

Villains in Addams Family movies go to really unnecessary lengths to defraud them of the family fortune. These people just give it away on whims all the time. If I just walked into the house and started wearing their clothes and spending their money, they wold start introducing me as Cousin Intruder and forget there was ever a time I didn’t live with them.

My hypothesis for this image has always been that taking into consideration the use of yahoo answers and the fact that they were both able to mutually think the other was a girl is that the chance they were both mid 2000s mall scene kids is insanely high

i wish i could be the person i want to be but im too tired

i am massively overdue for a very very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

reblog to give prev a very good week where not a single bad thing happens and everything is easy

The absolute contempt for these locks is palpable.