juniper @everythingstoofleeting - Tumblr Blog

girl who has only the most normal relationship with time and memory and regret and grief

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unfortunately i will be temporarily off tumblr due to needing to lock the fuck in... we are five weeks into my fifteen week summer and my project is becoming impressive in its nonexistence. i swear i will not return to tumblr until my annotations are done.

#frankly speaking i am also struggling to strike balance between spending time with friends and locking in...#both of course are things i want to do and care deeply about and believe make me me #thus of course the dilemma #however i can also recognize that i have been wasting COPIOUS amounts of time sleeping and on my phone. so that will be first.#etf yaps

catchymemes

Water biscuits

#water biscuits #!!!!!!

everythingstoofleeting

iconic ways my friends have come out to me:

"im allergic to nuts and bananas. which is symbolic."

"not to lore drop, but..."

everythingstoofleeting

here's me coming out to a few friends just now

#queerposting #etf yaps #my fucking gender

ACTUAL idiolect post: things ive been using lately:

"the big []". e.g. "im watching the big contra rn," "welcome back to the big home." thinking about doing a variation that's "the bug []." side note i really like "this is why they pay you the big bugs" and want to start "they should pay you real bugs for this"

"pov:" but in a completely pointless and useless way. e.g. my sister is doing the dishes and i say "pov youre doing the dishes." i also like telling my cat, "pov youre a nittle kinny!?!? pov youre the smallest kinny in the world!?!?!?"

whenever my sister asks me something i just ask her the very same thing back. "hey jiejie have you seen my book?" "hey q. hey q. hey q. have you seen your book?"

poopoofying everything. my friend is going to dc in the fall and im referring to it as "the big doodoo caca." he's also in the big switzerland rn, which ive dubbed "shitzerland"

#etf yaps #etf's idiolect

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i cant imagine myself fully living life as a guy... but then again i cant imagine myself doing it non-binarily or as a woman either... and furthermore i couldn't even imagine myself living life a few years ago so who really gives a gaf what i can imagine? ill figure it out the way i always do

#how do people do this !? im so fucking scared #time to go to bed though #my fucking gender #etf yaps

just spent half an hour dressing up as a boy in the mirror... which could mean nothing

#cut a little muscle tee and everything #but by god the grief and the weight of who i was supposed to be #and is it weird that a uni org is playing a huge factor in this #anyway im glad to be in this mess because at least i am looking at it #my fucking gender #etf yaps

everythingstoofleeting

okay, so, here's the thing, right:

some of my, like, pronoun preference has been aesthetics-based and not directly preference-based...

like admittedly going from she/her to she/they was a leap of faith. but then from she/they to they/she was more, like, about the slight difference in aesthetic between the two. and then for a long time i was really hesitant and nervous to go to they/them because i feared i didnt embody the aesthetic enough. (yes yes these are all arbitrary constructs but. you get it.) and now even though im interested in trying they/he, or even like they/he/she, im once again concerned that i dont fit or dont want to fit the "they/he aesthetic," to the extent that that's a real thing in my mind. but tbf i dont know how well i align with my concept of the "they/them aesthetic," either.

and simultaneously there's part of me that feels they/he but doesnt necessarily want to be referred to by he/him?

#etf yaps #my fucking gender #who up contemplating their gender rn #rb bc unfortunately very relevant #wow this is weird i was just feeling so comfortable being they them non-binary #anyway the unexamined life is not worth living and i am worth learning etc

same friend just wished me a "good gay transgender sleep"... god i fucking love being queer

#queerposting #etf yaps #she also previously he himmed me which may or may be related to my mentioned uncertainty #im typing all of this as i sit in my pink ass room 😭 silly silly silly #listened to anthems for a seventeen year old girl our entire convo btw #queers foreverrrrrrr

friend just came out to me and im so so so happy and joyful and yayyyy... but also im now requestioning my own gender...

#queerposting #etf yaps #my fucking gender

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everythingstoofleeting

"In the end my consciousness was given to me and me only, I have only my life to live"

everythingstoofleeting

“I always have the power to not feel harmed. If I choose not to feel harmed, then I haven’t been”

#watch out another friend dropped another one #wall #my wise friends #etf yaps

handsome ass fluttershy i saw today

#inexplicably every fluttershy in the book had this haircut #fluttershy is LITERALLY fucking the transest pony ever #god i love her i love him i love them etc etc #fluttershy #pongy #etf yaps

"In the end my consciousness was given to me and me only, I have only my life to live"

#talking to my friends genuinely is like talking to fucking plato bro #i need a tag for this #my wise friends #maybe idk #god i love my friends #etf yaps #wall

heyvamin

because who am i if i don‘t give my entire heart everytime?

#i will bare my heart over and over and over #let me be made of so much love it hurts #let me love loudly and intentionally and truly #i will try very hard to love love love until i die #to live is to love #etf yaps #wall

iconic ways my friends have come out to me:

"im allergic to nuts and bananas. which is symbolic."

"not to lore drop, but..."

#im gonna keep rbing this with new ones #queerposting #etf yaps

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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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ashen-crest

I can do it. I can write a chapter. I am capable of putting sentences together. I know what a comma is. I am Aware of the Character.

#I CAN PUT A THOUGHT TOGETHER 🗣🗣🗣🗣

it doesnt need to be perfect, it just needs to be. i will make the art that i want to see.

#sorry guys this is so fucking fire #i came up with it just now #wall #etf yaps

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