crossmyheartandhopetodie

“You’re so toxic. You drown me into sorrows and make me weep days on end. You’re so toxic. But the days you decide that you want to know me I feel as high as a kite. You’re so toxic. I have to beg for your time, your care, your love, your voice. You’re so toxic. But I fall to my knees at the sound of your voice and the accent of your tongue. You’re so toxic, but god I fucking love you.”

“Cigar in your mouth, deep voice and messy hair.”

“You’ll meet him. Through a friend, in one of your classes, somewhere. You’ll meet him - the bad boy with the tough aura. Eyes direct away from him yet yours are drawn to him. A smirk on his face yet a smile always dances on yours. Eyes cold , pitch black like a winters night and yours are warm and bright like a mid summer day. Polar fucking opposites. And then you’ll speak to him. May it be a small excuse me as you accidentally bump into each other or it may be a conversation full of his sly flirty remarks and your cheeks flushing red. And you’ll speak to him. - but for some reason it won’t go out of your head. The boy with walls built high enough to tower you , the boy who constantly keeps on this facade of not caring , him. He just won’t go away. And then suddenly it’s like he’s everywhere. You’re walking in school corridors and you see him , your out with your friends and out of no where your eyes catch these familiar ones that not only leaves you with a tingling sensation in your stomach but also gives you chills going down your spine. And you’ll hate it. Your life is finally put together, after so much shit everything’s going okay and suprisingly you’re okay and out of no where it’s like you’ve received a blow to your face cause suddenly everything’s about him. And you’ll hate it. And he’ll be in and out of your life for months - and it’s like everything’s falling apart but you don’t seem to care cause the boy who’s got twenty other girls on his line and a group of gangs after him is also the boy who has admitted to liking you even though he’s never liked anyone. He’s the boy who you stayed up till 4 in the morning with speaking about anything and everything. He’s the boy who held your hand when you were scared and hugged you to his chest. He’s the boy who protects , who constantly tells you he’s proud of you and that you mean so much to him. He’s the boy who’s made a group of girls unknown to you develop a hate for you over the fact that you’re speaking to the boy that also holds their hearts in the palm of his hands. And then out of no where when everything’s fucking perfect he’ll disappear. That’s the bad boy with the tough aura.

“I need a strong drink, a good book, like 30 tattoos, and a bad boy”

“He was bad news. His skin was an art, covered with tattoos. He was everything I was told to stay away from. And yet still, I found my self lying in his arms. He was heartless, cold, selfish.That’s what they all said. But what I saw was a lost boy, searching for love, searching for warmth. His every move pushed me towards the level of insanity and yet still, I fell for him, hard. He was the devil. And I? Well, I was the devil’s angel.”

“People who read are hiders. They hide who they are. People who hide don’t always like who they are.”

“Don’t fall in love with a good guy. Because when he leaves, you cannot hate him. You will think of all of the things he always did right; hating him will be so impossible, and loving him will still be so easy. Because he’ll want to be your friend. And you’ll want to be his, too. But catching up with him every 6 weeks will not be enough for your heart, and being his friend will be the most elaborate method of self-harm. Because he’ll still be the boy you fell in love with. When it’s all said and done, he won’t be anyone except exactly who you knew he was. And how do you fall out of love with the same exact characteristics that made you fall in love in the first place? So don’t date a good boy. Because when a bad boy leaves, at least you saw it coming. When a bad boy leaves, at least you can hate him. When a bad boy leaves, at least you can tell yourself that you were an idiot for falling for him in the first place. But with him— you did not see it coming. You can not hate him. You can not tell yourself you shouldn’t have fallen in love. Because he was a good boy, and good boys are good even when they leave you.”

They say “all good boys go to heaven”,but bad boys bring heaven to you.

“All I ever wanted was for a boy to love me. I was starting to think it was me that couldn’t be loved, until I realised that I didn’t love the right people. I pursued the heartbreakers and the womanisers, the drop outs and the bad boys, the drug dealers and the weed smokers, not the soft and gentle boys who would walk old ladies across the street and who would whisper those sweet three words I wanted so badly to hear, in my ear.”

“We are more than friends when we are alone.”