🪷 Hi! I'm Stella, but you can also call me Angeli, Estelle, or Star! Whatever works is fine by me!
🪷 I will obviously ramble for hours if given the chance. I have too much knowledge to share, really.
🪷 I have other accounts on AO3, Quotev, Artfight, Strawpage and Comic Fury! If you'd like to follow me there, feel free to! :D I am a multifandom blog!
🪷 My current interests are in Cookie Run Kingdom and Ninjago, but I also feature Sonic, Mlp, and LMK content!
🪷 My favorite characters are Silver, Shadow, Sonic, Tails, Amy Rose, Fluttershy, Twilight Sparkle, Izzy Moonbow, Himiko Toga, Ochaco Uraraka, Izuku Midoriya, Lloyd Garmadon, Marcille Donato, Falin Touden, Basil, Sayori, Monika, Susie, Noelle, Kris, Dess, Donatello, Raphael, Wukong, Red Son, Macaque, Nezha, Ao Lie, and many more.
🪷 Ocassional voice actor for Mei/Long Xiaojiao, and Lady Bone Demon.
🪷 Lesbian/Asexual Agender She/her is preferred but I'm fine with They/Them.
🪷 I have a couple Roleplay blog accounts! @tech-whiz-sora based on the Sora from Divided Conquest (with guests of the other characters), @destiny-is-in-shades-of-green for the LBD Lloyd AU, @silver-clouds-of-conflict for my LMK OCs, and @tribrid-kid for my Next Gen ninjago (slight crossover) AU!
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I think a lot of people misunderstand why enemies to lovers is so popular. It’s quickly become one of the most pervasive tropes in many novels. Is it the banter, the tension? That’s definitely part of it. But if that were true, then friends-to-lovers and literally any romance with good dialogue and characterization would scratch the same itch. For some, it does, but for many…enemies-to-lovers just hits different.
My theory is that it isn’t actually about love, not really. I think it fulfils a fantasy that no other trope can provide: the fantasy of being seen as an equal.
Think about what specifically makes someone an enemy in fiction. It’s not just someone the MC dislikes, it’s someone who can affect them in tangible ways, maybe even have the power to ruin them, challenge their worldview, expose their weaknesses, etc. The relationship begins with conflict because the characters are fundamentally opposed in some way. It doesn’t matter why, but they’re fighting. There is a struggle for dominance.
I would argue that the most impactful enemies-to-lovers moments are never the romantic moments, they’re the scenes where power shifts. They BOTH lose: they’re forced into a position that would have horrified them at the beginning of the story. They end up needing (or wanting) each other.
That’s why I think people are often disappointed when a supposed enemies-to-lovers story turns out to be a milquetoast attempt where they’re just kinda mean to each other for a few pages, and then immediately start making out. Where’s the risk, the actual threat? If the characters aren’t capable of genuinely affecting one another, then the relationship isn’t actually transforming in a satisfying way. The appeal is in the fact that they have power over each other, because the eventual trust they build requires real surrender.
Because here’s the thing about enemies; they pay attention, and usually more attention than anyone else. They notice weaknesses because they’re actively looking for them, they notice strengths because they need to account for them. They notice habits, blind spots, ambitions, fears.
They study the MC with a level of scrutiny that borders (and later crosses) intimate, but unlike friends (or supporting characters in the MC’s corner) they’re not willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, they don’t overlook flaws out of affection. Which is exactly what makes the eventual romance so satisfying. It feels earned.
It’s easy to imagine being loved by someone who sees the best version of you, but it’s an entirely different thing to be loved by someone who has seen you at your worst. That’s why this dynamic often feels more convincing than romances where the characters are immediately into each other.
I imagine there are many who go through life feeling misunderstood, or worse, that the people who love them only love the polished, perfect version they present to the world, almost like impostor syndrome. But what if there was someone who couldn’t be fooled by this carefully constructed image?
When someone more powerful chooses someone, maybe the fantasy is protection. When it’s someone less powerful, the fantasy might be admiration. But if there’s someone intelligent and observant enough to see the MC as an equal, the fantasy there is the most intense and honest validation.
Which means enemies to lovers was never about turning hate/annoyance into love, it was about turning power into vulnerability – which is a terrifying loss of power, which THEN leads to intimacy.
Yeah, I agree OP. It's about power and vulnerability!
Enemies to lovers at it's best is a wonderfully versatile kind of romance, because in the good ones you get things like:
How do you navigate opposing world views? Who challenges your ideals and values to make you a better person? How do you compromise? Because, in a good enemies-to-lovers, it can't actually be that the antagonist was never right about anything or that the protagonist was perfect, or there wouldn't be that mutual respect/attraction. They affect each other. They change each other.
Sacrifice - it's easy to love your friends, it can be easy to love when it doesn't cost you anything, but loving an enemy? What would you actually give up for love? What wouldn't you? When is love enough and when isn't it?
Redemption - not in the 'sad backstory' way, but in the way that you can be forgiven and loved despite the most monstrous or shameful things you have ever done
All of these themes tie into vulnerability, our sense of self, and our power over ourselves and others.
In a good enemies-to-lovers story I don't think it can ever feel like they are just together because it's a romance story. You have to earn it.
Enemies-to-lovers interrogates what it means to love, and how we define love, in a way that I don't think other genres do as much. But I'm also hopelessly biased so!
I’m actually going to reblog a thing just because this is really important.
As someone who has epilepsy and used to have several grand mal seizures a day, I’d also like to add that “offer help” can range anywhere from keeping the person calm to explaining to them where they are and what they were doing to even just telling them they should sit and rest for a while longer (lack or coordination is common, and it can be hard to walk straight or see clearly).
It’s okay for them to take up to a half hour to fully regain their bearings and sort out what they were doing prior to the seizure. Just answer any questions calmly and be there for support.
If they come around and you start to panic or shake them or ask them what the heck is wrong with them they are going to freak out and panic too.
I cannot stress it enough that this is bad.
If someone has a seizure and they come out of it, please. please stay calm.
They are likely disoriented and confused, even if it’s only for a minute or two, and you don’t want them panicking on top of that because they can have another seizure as a result.
IMPORTANT because last year a kid in my class had a seizure, none of us even knew he was at risk for them either so just cause you don’t think you know anyone doesn’t mean you don’t
I have to stress how important it is to time a seizure. If it lasts more than a few minutes, call an ambulance.
DO NOT CALL THE POLICE. I’m dead fucking serious. I had a grand mal in public once and the POLICE were called and imagine coming out of the seizure, feeling like you got smacked in the head with a sack full of bricks, confused, dazed, in desperate need of some sugar to boost low blood pressure and some DIPSHIT has called the police and I was being threatened with being ‘drunk and disorderly’. It took a phone call to my doctors office to get them to back off. The police cannot properly deal with sick people.
Offer help can be:
assuring person where they are/what time it is
getting them something to drink if they can; seizure burns so much energy and does cause a blood pressure drop
getting them safely to transport or a carer
getting them some dignity like a blanket/towel [loosing control of your bladder and bowels is fucking horrifying]
ensuring they have a way to get home. Someone who has just had a seizure should NEVER DRIVE straight after
calling emergency services if you notice any of these symptoms because they may have stroked out.
Why you shouldn’t put anything in someone’s mouth: they will choke. Yes, they may bite their tongue but I can assure you it’s less traumatic than cracking your jaw on someone’s greasy wallet or choking on a spoon.
DO NOT HOLD ANYONE DOWN. Example: someone pinned my right shoulder mid-seizure a few years back and how I have a permanently displaced and clicking shoulder. Let the person flail around, those muscles are out of control and restraining them does cause more damage to the patient and you.
People can also have seizures that look epileptic, but are rather psychogenic. I had a coworker who had PNES (psychogenic non-epileptic seizures) as a result of trauma, and I learned a lot about this from them.
Because PNES seizures aren’t caused by the same thing as epileptic seizures, they can look similar but people can be semi-conscious during them, generally do not lose full control of their bodies (bladder/bowels and other reflexes remain), and importantly, they can last longer than 5 minutes (even hours) without causing long-term damage.
The “do not call the police” point was especially vital for them, because people with PNES are more vulnerable to medical abuse by professionals who think they are “faking” because the seizure isn’t epileptic, and a person with PNES may have medical trauma from being treated cruelly by doctors, family members, etc. while seizing in the past. This study looked at stigma around PNES (also called functional seizures; I’m using PNES because its what my coworker called it):
Literature suggests that it can take years for patients to finally get a diagnosis of FS, but once they receive the diagnosis, it is often met with negative stereotypes and perceptions that lead to stigmatisation and treatment resistance. […] Moreover, with 34 of the 70 included data sources reflecting HCP [healthcare professional] stigma, one of the main themes that arose from this review illustrated the importance of HCPs’ acknowledgement and acceptance of their role in both perpetuating and reducing FS stigma. From our review it became apparent that HCPs’ negative attitudes towards patients with FS persist in the health community, often because of a lack of knowledge, general awareness, understanding and medical training with regards to this disorder
For my coworker, they expressed that one of the most important things for them was to just not be alone, to have someone verbally saying they were with them and it would be alright, and then to be supported according to their needs once the seizure ended. Their seizures were often triggered by stress, or from trauma triggers, so being treated with compassion, having their body respected, and having a calm environment during and after the seizure were very important.
Obviously if you have no other context, its best to assume an epileptic seizure and act accordingly. But to return to the graphic above, check for any kind of ID, whether a tag or medical bracelet or anything else! And do not treat psychogenic / functional seizures as less real or less important, and don’t let anyone around the person who is seizing treat it that way either.
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I think we really need to put into perspective how Shadow Milk views and acts his life as if he is in a fanfic. He is living his own AU and wants to make sure canon doesn't ruin it.
I wish I was joking, but I really do find this funny to think about.
On a more serious note, bro genuinely doesn't see reality as real, but a scripted event he either needs to break and rewrite, or kill the director of it all.
Probably everyone has thought about this already, but it's been sinking in due to how I'm deconstructing him to learn how to rewrite him.
I always joke about Ult Shadow being a crk fan, writing their own AU to fix the story. Making his evil versons of the cast, in his awsome rewrite/corruption AU.
Its what makes ULt ShadowMilk so fun to me personally, do deluded to the point where he can't lie anymore, he has to make his lies true by bending reality
Bending reality to be true for him is so fun actually!
I know in my own au Shadow Milk does have a small power nerf (no ultimate dough + one soul jam fragment) HOWEVER I inadvertently made him that one au writer who just bashes on characters they hate from Canon XD (namely his past self and Pure Vanilla Cookie) (this was completely unintentional on my part but it's hilarious regardless)
Looking at the au from that lense is really funny. Totally understand it's not Canon in the slightest and has more room to work with in writing the narrative but whenever I do write ultimate Smilk (or at least half of that power because it's technically split in two via Eternal Sugar) I keep asking myself "would he do this in Canon?" and if the answer is anything regarding yes due to pettiness, personal grudges, implications, etc etc it's becoming a thing.
Yap incoming:
He's not driven to insanity normally by the ultimate dough, instead I decided to use APATHY as a substitute. Shadow Milk thrives off of "unpredictability" mascarading as control, he likes making events he can observe and adjust to what he desires. His own little circus. But with Apathy thrown into the mix, now all of a sudden "if everything is so meaningless then what joy is there to bring in a world where the unpredictable becomes predictable?"
This leads him to seeking out literally ANYTHING to give him a shred of emotion, some semblance of control over his psyche. Yes he managed to survive the original timeline AND form a perfect world full of delusional cookies believing they're in peace. But once the cycle becomes so boring and monotonous and there's little joy in catching the faulty cookies, he starts to go a little mad (you can compare this mentality to Timekeeper's, actually. Just with way more theatrics and desperation laced into it). To break monotony, he needs to start causing chaos. But if he does, it'll ruin the illusion of Paradise. So what does he do?
He breaks the cookies threatening to harm the world he's helped construct. Because bringing others down to his level makes him feel happy. No wonder he completely destroyed the Pure Vanilla Cookie psychologically from the timeline they invaded, he likes seeing him just as miserable as he is! Same with his past self who "hasn't seen the truth" in his eyes. Because what truth is there if HE HIMSELF is the new truth of this world?
He maintains complete control over the broken and in despair, because they are more likely to give into those sweet little lies to make the pain stop... Why wouldn't they? These conditions are horrible for any Cookie. Why should they keep suffering under the weight of their pain when they could just accept that they're trying to help them?
He prefers the fighters of this mentality the most. They're much more entertaining than the ones who buckle under the pressure in a matter of hours. His other half literally fills that void no matter what timeline he's from. The original who's been dealing with him since his release, or the new timeline where any shred of quiet defiance to give him an answer makes him both mad and ecstatic that he's actually FEELING something.
Imagine having a life stripped of so much meaning you claw and thrash your way back to the surface in a desperate attempt to grasp control over it.
No wonder he's not mentally sane. I wouldn't be either in his position after everything he went through.
Side note: I can also yap about how Eternal Sugar shifted similarly due to this arrangement. Whereas Shadow Milk now holds Apathy alongside Deceit, Eternal Sugar holds Destruction alongside Sloth.
The interesting thing that manifested out of this was both a similar level of control but also a more heavy willingness to engage in the "dirty work" to keep the Paradise pristine.
Destruction doesn't manifest physically in this case, for Eternal Sugar it shows itself in a more psychological movement. She keeps her cookies happy and content, where no one is hurt and everyone is happy as she likes.
... But then some cookies start to slip. They begin to question things, try to push the rules, like rebellious little things. Why should she allow this to continue when it's clearly going to hurt other cookies. She can't have that, now can she?
So she takes them and gets rid of any semblance of "mental gunk" from their minds and souls, bringing them back to that peacefully ignorant bliss. It's a destruction of free thinking and autonomy in paradise which is what makes this so disturbing.
Adding onto this, she's also a lot more intense when it comes to her anger. Say something wrong too many times, and she will snap at you. Disagree with how things are run, and you are going to be scrubbed clean of that "filth" tarnishing this beloved world.
... Now doesn't that just sound a little cultish? Everyone follows under a false god/goddess (Eternal Sugar, Shadow Milk is more "behind the scenes" in this timeline but he's still very much present), they have set rules, set things they can eat and wear, activities they can do. There's no money, there's no kingdoms, absolutely zero hostility. Because that is not happiness, that's cruelty. And cruelty infects happy cookies, turning them filthy and cruel.
Everything must be under her command because if a single thing is out of place it threatens to destroy the whole illusion. So she destroys the threat first through "peaceful" means. By that I mean she wipes them clean of all rebellious and wicked thoughts until we're set back to base with nothing to show for progress.
And it's still the corrupted form of Change, the original virtue. Instead of forcing change, she is PREVENTING it from occurring in the first place. Because if change in any capacity, both good or bad were to occur, it would break everything about this paradise.
Sloth is also a key component in this because although she's slightly more proactive than Canon Eternal Sugar, she's still relying on a lot of her manipulation and care to lull cookies into this consistent, relaxed sense of security and peace. Sloth, to her, is the key to happiness because if every cookie is relaxed and peaceful enough then there will be no harm, only world peace!
Effectively, Eternal Sugar in this interpretation becomes a much more active manipulator and will do everything in her power to keep this peaceful, sweet, utopic narrative going. Because if a single thing cracks that perception, it all collapses under its lies.
Both Shadow Milk and Eternal Sugar are integral to this timeline for this exact situation. Shadow Milk monitors, Eternal Sugar acts. Both are psychological tormentors, but one dives fully into the misery whilst the other erases it entirely. Similar methods, opposites in execution. And BOTH are reliant on controlling those under them to keep this narrative going.
No one is going to destroy their paradise. Not on their watch.
I think we really need to put into perspective how Shadow Milk views and acts his life as if he is in a fanfic. He is living his own AU and wants to make sure canon doesn't ruin it.
I wish I was joking, but I really do find this funny to think about.
On a more serious note, bro genuinely doesn't see reality as real, but a scripted event he either needs to break and rewrite, or kill the director of it all.
Probably everyone has thought about this already, but it's been sinking in due to how I'm deconstructing him to learn how to rewrite him.
I always joke about Ult Shadow being a crk fan, writing their own AU to fix the story. Making his evil versons of the cast, in his awsome rewrite/corruption AU.
Its what makes ULt ShadowMilk so fun to me personally, do deluded to the point where he can't lie anymore, he has to make his lies true by bending reality
Bending reality to be true for him is so fun actually!
I know in my own au Shadow Milk does have a small power nerf (no ultimate dough + one soul jam fragment) HOWEVER I inadvertently made him that one au writer who just bashes on characters they hate from Canon XD (namely his past self and Pure Vanilla Cookie) (this was completely unintentional on my part but it's hilarious regardless)
Looking at the au from that lense is really funny. Totally understand it's not Canon in the slightest and has more room to work with in writing the narrative but whenever I do write ultimate Smilk (or at least half of that power because it's technically split in two via Eternal Sugar) I keep asking myself "would he do this in Canon?" and if the answer is anything regarding yes due to pettiness, personal grudges, implications, etc etc it's becoming a thing.
Yap incoming:
He's not driven to insanity normally by the ultimate dough, instead I decided to use APATHY as a substitute. Shadow Milk thrives off of "unpredictability" mascarading as control, he likes making events he can observe and adjust to what he desires. His own little circus. But with Apathy thrown into the mix, now all of a sudden "if everything is so meaningless then what joy is there to bring in a world where the unpredictable becomes predictable?"
This leads him to seeking out literally ANYTHING to give him a shred of emotion, some semblance of control over his psyche. Yes he managed to survive the original timeline AND form a perfect world full of delusional cookies believing they're in peace. But once the cycle becomes so boring and monotonous and there's little joy in catching the faulty cookies, he starts to go a little mad (you can compare this mentality to Timekeeper's, actually. Just with way more theatrics and desperation laced into it). To break monotony, he needs to start causing chaos. But if he does, it'll ruin the illusion of Paradise. So what does he do?
He breaks the cookies threatening to harm the world he's helped construct. Because bringing others down to his level makes him feel happy. No wonder he completely destroyed the Pure Vanilla Cookie psychologically from the timeline they invaded, he likes seeing him just as miserable as he is! Same with his past self who "hasn't seen the truth" in his eyes. Because what truth is there if HE HIMSELF is the new truth of this world?
He maintains complete control over the broken and in despair, because they are more likely to give into those sweet little lies to make the pain stop... Why wouldn't they? These conditions are horrible for any Cookie. Why should they keep suffering under the weight of their pain when they could just accept that they're trying to help them?
He prefers the fighters of this mentality the most. They're much more entertaining than the ones who buckle under the pressure in a matter of hours. His other half literally fills that void no matter what timeline he's from. The original who's been dealing with him since his release, or the new timeline where any shred of quiet defiance to give him an answer makes him both mad and ecstatic that he's actually FEELING something.
Imagine having a life stripped of so much meaning you claw and thrash your way back to the surface in a desperate attempt to grasp control over it.
No wonder he's not mentally sane. I wouldn't be either in his position after everything he went through.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
