e s • k a p e

November 16 2015

I don’t get it, but I get it. I get that she doesn’t want people to know her real her. But I don’t get how she sees us as someone she doesn’t trust enough for us to know her. Do you get this? Probably not. Sigh. I’m not mad. Frustrated, maybe. She complains and sulks about how she has no real friends. But when people like me and you try to reach out to her, she blocks you out of her ‘life’. Literally. She blocked me on twitter. It’s kind of pathetic.

This may sound selfish or something, but, I’ve always wanted friends. Like, legit friends. I wanted people who really cared about me and genuinely were worried for me. Someone who loved me despite my weird quirks and all (as a friend or more). And now that I’m trying to be that person for her when no one was for me, she rejects me. She doesn’t just reject my help, she also rejects me. At least that’s how it feels like. Maybe it isn’t, maybe it is. 

I could try to ask her what she’s really feeling about this situation. Nah. It’ll probably make things worse. And I’d lose a potential friend. But should I risk it? Is she worth it?

Hello again! So, this is something I’ve been wanting to do for a while now. I have decided to create ‘#CurrentlyReading’. Every time I finish a book, I will kind of post a review and give it a rating. The next part of that post will be the next book I have chosen to read. So.. shall we start?

Unknown Date 2015

It was always like that. It’s always been. But what is your limit when you see pictures and tweets being sent out simultaneously? Am I even allowed to have a limit? Do I have the right? You see, I thought best friends were supposed to tell everything to each other. Do everything together. Experience the tiniest but the most memorable shenanigans friendships could ever have. I’ve always tried my best to put aside the ridiculous jealousy. Because, maybe, just maybe - it wasn’t intentional. Maybe they didn’t mean for me to be excluded in that one time they went to her house and talked about things we were supposed to together. Maybe it wasn’t their intention to exclude me from their inside jokes because I wasn’t there on the day they hung out. Maybe I’m just delusional. Probably, I just need to talk it out with them. But how can you talk out a problem if the problem never seemed to exist?

Hello. If you haven’t even glanced at the description or the about section up there, well, now I have to go through the whole thing again for you. It’s okay though, I don’t mind. (((i actually do)))

I’m a real person with a real name. But this blog is meant for me to express my feelings and escape reality. Thus, I have decided to name myself Olivia in this blog. Reasons are stated in the about page. Go read it. It took me a while to choose the font.

I know that the fact that this blog is meant for me to express myself but refusing to reveal my true self, doesn’t make sense. But I hope you try to understand what anonymity can do.

Anyway, this blog will comprise of reflections, book reviews to the most random things. I hope you stay with me till the end of this journey of blogging and writing.

To the beginning and the end,