Destroyed

This is a message to everyone out there. Please read this.

It took me way too long to realize how important my life is. I never thought I was beautiful and I struggled with confidence and self esteem for a really long time. I also admiringly enjoyed feeling this way. I thought it made me humble to not see myself as beautiful and I thought it made me cool to hate the world and say “I hate people” (eh. Sometimes the human race still makes that line slip out of my mouth lol) but my point is. I thought I was cool to feel like shit. But It really didn’t feel good. I wasn’t afraid of death and I was proud of that. I didn’t care if I was gonna die that day.It didn’t scare me. But now nothing scares me more than dying and I couldn’t be more proud of that. Proud that I want to live a full life and I have goals and aspirations that I want to achieve. I’m proud to be afraid of death. It’s really not easy to see how beautiful and precious life is. It sounds so cliche when u hear all the quotes like. Life is short be happy or love yourself. Because before u see it, those are just empty words. When all u see and feel is sadness and hatred toward yourself these words don’t mean anything. But they really do. Once u learn to be happy for yourself. You’re gonna see what the point of living Is. Ur gonna see that there is a point to living and fighting But to be happy. U have to get rid of all the things that don’t allow u to be happy. U have to learn to not care about people judging u. Again. It sounds so cliche but if u think about it. If ur doing something that u love or wearing something u love. It should make u happy. other people might judge u but as long as u know it makes u happy why does their opinion fucking matter? It only matters because u let it. If u let their opinion effect u and don’t do what makes u happy just to get their approval. Are u happy now? No. Of course not cause ur not doing what u fucking love. It’s your life. Not theirs. They might do shit u don’t like but that’s fine cause as long as it doesn’t effect u. It doesn’t matter. They’re happy doing it so leave them alone. we all wanna be liked by every person but we’re not all the same and why do we want to be. Ur gonna like different things than I do and that’s more than okay. I might hate what ur wearing but it shouldn’t matter. U should still rock it because u like it and it’s ur God Damn body. I would say it’s not for me, but if ur happy I’m all for it. Ke life for yourself. One of the biggest things that effects us is the media. Beauty is now perceived as this impossible image and we’re slowly fighting it but what we really have to do is visually change what we see beauty as. There are ads that say “all sizes are beautiful” but I think those are just empty words cause unfortunately if u took a picture of a heavy person and one of someone with a 6 pack and a thigh gap, most people are gonna say that one is the more attractive person because that’s what beauty is seen as but who the fuck says that’s the only version of beauty? like why is that more visually appealing. we have to show the reality that bodies are all different and everyone has their own appeal to different shapes so one type of body can’t be considered beautiful to every eye. We all see different things as beautiful. Even if ur the most attractive person in the fucking world (by the media standards) there will be people who find u unattractive and U shouldn’t be offended by this because not everyone is gonna see the same thing as beautiful and that’s Okay. Why are we all trying to be the same like mechanical robots. There are people who think I’m not pretty and that’s cool because I find myself to be beautiful and if ur not attracted to me. It’s fine. Even if the whole world sees me as ugly. I love who I am and no one can take that from me. U wanna be happy? Don’t put makeup on because u think people won’t talk to u unless ur face is all caked up with that stuff. (Side note: if ur wearing makeup for u and not to impress other people. That’s a different story. U rock u girl) but If people don’t see u as pretty. So what. Just be kind and ur Beaty will show. flaws are natural and beauty should be natural with those flaws.