"Ugh…" Eito hated cramped spaces, especially spaces filled with all these strangers. In this sea of bodies where the majority sure they had room to breathe, Eito actually made the most of the close proximity with the person before him. It was the only reason he wasn't entirely frustrated with this situation. "…" He didn't even hide how much he stared at Shuichi's reflection on the window, studying every detail on his face like his life depended on it. In a way, perhaps it did.
Shuichi was Eito's (third) fiancé, his future, and his everything. However, before any of that could even materialize, they had to take things one step at a time. So, what better way to get to know Shuichi than inviting him over at his place? The intentions for asking such a thing this early did sound questionable on paper, but Eito's desires were rather superficial, even childish. Surely, there was nothing wrong about wanting to spend time with the person his future was dedicated to.
Shuichi-kun seems to have beautiful eyes, with long lashes that are just as pretty. His hair looks soft to the touch, too. And the skin… A certain thought made him shudder, but not for the typical reason. The etiquette part of his brain reminded Eito that he ought to consider Shuichi's feelings, not just his own. He leaned forward to check if Shuichi had the bare minimum for breathing space. "Sorry, Shuichi-kun. Is it too cramped for you?" he whispered. "Usually, I'd wait for rush hour to pass, but I don't want you to leave late at night."
Before he could get any answer, the train shook, making the crowd move along with it, causing Eito to move forward involuntarily. His eyes were quick to catch Shuichi stumbling, and in the nick of time, slammed his gloved hand against the window to help him regain his balance. Consequently, it ended up looking like Eito pinned Shuichi against window on purpose. He felt sparks setting off within him, but reality snapped back to him just as fast.
"Are you okay?" For the first time since they boarded the train, Eito had to avert his gaze. "I know I'm inconveniencing you like this. I'm sorry for being selfish, even if we're assigned to each other. It's just that…" Countless words and phrases cascaded from his subconscious like raindrops. Things that he wanted to be known, but chose to be rather left unsaid. "Never mind." He dropped his arm to his side, looking back again at Shuichi, his smile sheepish. "Please bear with me for a bit longer."
( what better way to start this verse than with something... "spicy"?? LOL at least spicy for their standards : P eito looks excited wow??? but we know why nyehehe B) )
It was like Shuichi was aware of even the slighest signs of attention when it came to being in public. Not to say that he was a stranger to traveling by train, it was in fact pretty common for him to use it as his preferred transit. Yet, it didn't diminish the fact that he was pretty conscious on how the crowd of people were so close and bunched together. Every little movement, hushed murmur, eye contact and adjustment was noted by him while he tensely stood to the side. Crowds, especially the rush hour types, were the worst to maneuver and survive in. He couldn't help but feel as if every barely made gesture he did was being studied and picked apart by the passing gaze of others. The train carriage they're both in not only felt slightly overwhelming, but incredibly hot and cluttered.
A nervous swallow, Shuichi averts his gaze back to the window where Eito had been staring out of. Just like he had promised before, he chose to leave his hat at home in favor of placing his chosen fiancé's acknowledgement and trust in the forefront. Finding that maybe… just maybe, he held onto the ideal that he'd be better liked by him without hiding a part of himself: The nervousness, the anxiety. It's all thanks to Kaede that he felt a little braver today than he did before.
Maybe this is a sign, he would think to himself as he turns to glance at his fiancé.
His name is Eito Aotsuki. I haven't learned a lot about him other than his mannerisms. He seems attentive… gentle.. considerate. I had asked him before what his life had been like so far, but he opted to take me to his place so we can get to know each other better. I'm… nervous, but I'm also… curious.
The one chosen out of many strands of data, analytics, status, compatibility. He still didn't understand how the assigned marriages were determined, but there had to be SOME factor in it.
Which led him to notice something while they were both standing near each other. Eito… didn't seem to be looking at him a whole lot. In fact, when they were both looking out the window and Shuichi turns to look back at him, he seemed more interested in what was going on outside. Silently standing in his place, feeling his gaze drift from Eito down to his phone, Shuichi felt a cold chill.
There could be countless of reasons why this felt out of sorts but, a rising doubt within Shuichi had somehow whispered in the depths of his mind. Maybe the system had paired him with someone that ultimately didn't like him that much…? Or, maybe he wasn't doing enough to keep the other engaged. Kaede had mentioned before that couples, assigned or not, talked a lot about their interests.
So… what was Eito interested in…? Or, was it too late to begin with? Was he disappointed in him...? Or, maybe he was expecting someone a little more... more than himself.
Avoiding the growing threat of his worry, Shuichi opted to tap on his phone and check for any messages from anyone that he knew. Hoping to distract him from the reality crowding around him. Hoping to muffle and silence the inner doubt, an attempt to reach for the surface for anything logical.
All he could see were his messages from Kaede from the other day. His attention casting downward, while Eito would continue to look out the window.
-{ Yesterday - 10:00 PM }-
{Kaede}: Hey, don't beat yourself up over it! Just find something you both like and everything will follow through. Remember, it's normal to feel scared or nervous! Just go with the flow, it's not a race. <:
{Kaede}: I'll ttyl but try to get some sleep!!
-{ Read }-
He hadn't responded to her text after the fact, since he decided to follow her words and place his trust on his and Eito's table… and soon, maybe… his heart… if Eito felt the same way.
Golden eyes suddenly were drawn away from the phone screen upon hearing Eito's hushed whisper. He's reminded that they both are in a rather crowded train carriage, the air thick and heavy with city life and closed-in spaces. It made it hard to concentrate and relax, but hearing Eito's reasoning for taking the train now instead of later… felt kind-hearted of him. One that would earn a small smile of his own.
Lips part to answer- except the train suddenly LURCHED! A shutter and change in momentum had the people around them stumble ever so slightly. Unfortunate for Shuichi, he hadn't expected the sudden shift when the weight of his footing almost gave way-
-only to feel his back press against something cold and glassy. A surprised gasp upon contact, Shuichi could feel his heart practically leap out of his chest. The sounds of rattling and metallic wheels shuddering had only lasted a moment, but when the minor chaos had subsided he was met with a rather unexpected position.
His gaze followed from the gloved hand pressing against the window behind him to his arm, and then to Eito himself. While noting how Eito (seemingly) glances away again from him, Shuichi couldn't help but notice the little details he had failed to pick out before.
How many tiny speckles of silver were hidden within the pale blue of his eyes. How he noticed the close scent of clean linen delicately hinted on his outfit. How much warmth he felt with how utterly close he was to pick out how handsome he looked. Shuichi could practically feel the surprise of his heart jump up into his throat and pound into his ears, any thoughts dissipating in the moment the more he took note of those smaller little details. The more he took in Eito's appearance, the more he felt his mouth turn dry and his gaze linger.
A spark runs down his spine when he registers that this is the closest they’ve been so far.
So distracted was he that he didn't realize how flustered he seemed in realizing that anyone could see them in their predicament. Feeling Eito back up first, Shuichi had to quite literally find his voice in order to answer Eito: It sounded like he was blaming himself, neither of them could be blamed for this even if given the circumstance. Shuichi calmed his heartrate down, the warmth resting on his cheeks slowly ebbing away (although not fast enough), he reassured Eito with a gentle smile and a soft chuckle. An attempt to break the doubt, to find a footing somewhere between the both of them while the crowd around them continued to play oblivious.
"I-I'm okay, thank you… It's not your fault though. I don't see you as an inconvenience at all."
Shuichi nods at him, polite and forward with him despite the calming pink on his face.
"W…We don't have much control over our assigned status, so it's not your fault. I'm… honestly excited to see and hear more about you."
Shuichi, deep down, still felt nervous and also curious to draw a need of understanding. Was Eito inconveniencing him here… or did Shuichi lack the experience to read how Eito feels? A few puzzle pieces of confusion that Shuichi himself would hold onto, but until then… the detective answered Eito's sheepish smile with his own. Even with his own doubts and insecurities… he knew for certain that neither could be blamed here.
"If anything… You've made me feel more secure by being here with me. If going out of your way like this is selfish, then maybe I can relate to that. So… I don't mind at all. I may be a little nervous because this is my first time being with someone, chosen or not, but so far, i'm having a good time, Eito-kun."
Even within a crowded train carriage and the uneasiness of other people staring at them, picking them apart mentally or judging them, Shuichi found comfort in Eito's presence beside him.
