shifting is actually my dreams coming true forever and ever . . .
like i have always wanted to do performing arts. to the point just looking at others perform would instantly bring tears to my eyes. i would do absolutely anything to have the opportunities they have. i was never bitter about it— i felt too happy for performers to be resentful towards them. i love that they get to do what they do because i'm sure they love it just as much as i do. if i were them i would want people to be happy for me. i would cry because performing arts is so so beautiful and i would never get the chance to express my love through it.
when i was fourteen or fifteen, i told my parents that i would work everyday of the week for them so that i could pay for acting classes. they are seperated but i would make it all work. one didn't even hear what i said and the other made fun of me and told me that i wouldn't be able to do anything on a stage.
a few years later i discovered shifting. now i cry tears of joy when i watch performing arts because it's finally mine to have.
i do know that i will never be able to do performing arts here in my cr because i got sick two years ago and it would be too much strain on my body. but i also know that this reality is just one tiny grain of salt within an infinite sea of realities. i don't get to dance or act here but i do in every single one of my drs!!!
painting is "scene from giselle" by the artist carlotta edwards.