Ashes to Ashes

getting a jobjob from a water cooler with big pronouns

i like that this post is a joke about torrenting, but the gravity of mom is so strong that almost nothing in the notes can escape it. everyone knows it's mom and they want mom.

it's meee I'm your guardian angel hiiiiii 😇 okay🙏 so. in about six months, you're gonna die of starvation. 🥺 and if I don't protect you, I will get: #fired! 🫢 and that is No Good 🙅‍♀️ hahaaa So. 🙏 I looked into causes of starvation, and it turns out: Your death is totally preventable! 😯 Uh oh! 😆 There's more than enough food to sustain you without interfering with anyone else's survival, but you're not allowed to have it! 🤨 Whaaat? 🤷‍♀️ Apparently, your death is premeditated by thousands of things called "shareholders." So. 🙏 I've been killing people,

hey kitten. daddy needs to talk to you. your kink blog is great, but you are not highlighting the words correctly. kitten. stop highlighting. this is shit. did you seriously highlight that period. kitten.

secretary birds look pretty normal but for some reason people have collectively decided to photograph them like they're [takes a moment to find an acceptable way to say this] women

Pokémon isnt very great to play but I goon to the characters

Which is basically the same thing

take my ass to torture city where the grass is ouch and the girls are hit me

never forget that its is china and the ussr who took the greatest losses in world war 2. never forget the asian and african soldiers who fought on the side of the allied forces against the nazis. never forget that the french massacred the african soldiers who fought with them when the latter asked for better pay and living conditions.