Embrace.Beloved

Distance brings clarity. So much clarity. I may have to stay distant from you forever, but so much the better I'd say.

Do you think that life is just inherently harder for some people? Or am I just making it harder on myself?

I hate relapsing. I'm going and in fine then all of the sudden it's everything all over again. And it hurts and I miss you and I wish you would come back. I honestly wish I knew what is best for both of us.

A full moon may happen twice in one month. The world might look blue for just a night. You might get to see the very last show ever of a band you just discovered you loved. You also might get to ironically drink a Blue Moon on said night at said concert. Or yell at people from your car about how much you love Asheville or talk to guys in the back of pick up trucks at red lights. Or see your ex again and have to hug him and make small talk with him or feel your heart hurt and race and jump out of your skin. In some sense, I'm glad these things sometimes only happen occasionally. But sometimes I wish we'd realize the beauty of chance events and just savor them for their surprising, sweet rarity and be reminded to relish every single moment because when it's gone, who knows when and if it will come around again.

It wasn't okay what he did to you. I hope you know that. I hope you won't let him take your power away. I hope you hug yourself everyday and tell yourself how awesome you are. Because you deserve every wonderful thing and more. And he is not any of those things.

Wow August, you really kicked me in the ass. September, I'm kicking yours.

Never, ever drink with counselors. They will end up massaging your feet and psychoanalyzing your aversion to men.

Thank you Uncg grad school for making registration a bitch. Fml.

My friends inspire me daily.

Do you ever have a day where you keep running into the same person over and over again? And you didn't mean to, you swear you didn't mean to. Is it coincidence or fate or God? Or something smaller? Maybe its just me being silly. Or just plain awkward. I could love you forever, I just might.

I was made to work with people who aren't normal. It sounds odd to say, but that revelation alone has impacted the course of my life. My life is anything but normal for whatever reason, so I want to help people. Normal people need help with what to wear everyday or finding someone to manage their trust fun. The rest of us are so broken, so desperately desperately broken. The rest of us are wondering how to pay the electric bill and not eating for days so their house doesn't get repossessed. Are riding the bus everywhere because they've never owned a car in their life because they can't get the credit for it. Are spending their lives in the hospital watching their four year old little boy die of cancer. Are going to live with their grandma for a year and switch schools and cities while their mom 'gets things worked out' All your shit doesn't seem so important now does it. Yea, neither does mine.

I miss my asheville squirrels. My heart hurts just little bit. I'm a lonely critter.

I've entirely too many winter socks for any one person.