Pieces of My Life - According to Me

Recently I have been feeling as though I have not been enough at work, at home, in my education - basically a complete failure. Here I am, nearing 30 and still nowhere near where I thought I would be at this time in my life. Though my early vision of my 20s including me going away to college, playing colliegate softball and not being married or a mother. I have been blessed because I have been blessed to be a mother and a wife - things that are much more fulfilling than I ever could have imagined. While being a mother and wife is stressful, it is also incredibly rewarding. This week my son began kindergarten and I was so emotional about his new milestone. Though, with school comes a pluthera of new stressors, I have been fortunate enough to have a great and understanding employer. I have a new work schedule, which will take some more getting used to - but at least I can put my little man on the school bus and get emotional about it everyday! I have also begun school again to work toward my 2nd Bachelor's degree [mainly to help improve my GPA for better marketing during my law school admission process. I have some very interesting classes this semester - which excites me about school. I have such a passion to become an attorney, if only my intellect and financial status compared to my passion so that I can make the most of my law school application preparations. Unfortunately, I have not had the luxery of only "doing school" or "only studying." I have worked since I was a junior in high school and after high school, I've worked full-time. I want to make sure that I accomplish more than my parents did to provide for my family more than I had (and I was well taken care of). My problem with my finances is that I am ADDICTED to Starbucks' $5 frappucinos! Ughhhhh. These damn things will be the bane of my existance. Again, I am blessed that my life has taken the detours it has because my late grandpa was able to meet and love my son. I was able to obtain a Bachelor's degree for my grandpa to be present for and celebrate with me. I have also been incredibly blessed to have a great job that pays me well to help others. At the end of the day, I am disappointed in myself but also very proud to have accompished what I have.

I had an extremely difficult day today. It was a mixture of both anxiousness and dread, mixed with adrenaline. I drove 3 hours away from my family today for work - workign in the legal field is great and awful sometimes. Today was one of the rare awful days. We are about to embark on an eight day trial in the middle of the local reservation. While I appreciate that my office brings me to trial, because it's such a great and rare learning experience. It allows me to understand the legal concepts and theories that allow our office to be so successful on the reservation. Though, I cannot help but think about my family back home - my husband and my son. I cannot wait to be surrounded by their voices, laughs, constant inquiries, and the pestering. I miss them both already so much! What I wouldn't do to be with them right now? Back to our trial, we are here because of a grocery store - and a fall that occurred there. It is all a dispute over what injuries occurred and what caused the onset of some very specific symptoms and where they should be attributed.

During the past few months I have been rejected from 11 law schools but it's okay. I'm not going to get down on myself or give up on my dreams. Sure I'm not necessarily the typical prospective law student. I know that I have things I need to work on to make myself a more viable applicant. For some it's merely an application process while for me, it's my life's dream to be an attorney. I know I'm smart enough, I just have to apply myself better toward the things necessary to be admitted into a good law school. My hunt continues in pursuit of law school. 🌝🌝

I've been having a rough start to my year, mainly because my law school applications are out and I'm being judged. I recently realized that some of my grades from my final semester of my bachelors degree were changed to mere credit... Ugh. I now have the wonderful task of speaking with my professor and making my case to restore my traditional letter grades! Please send me good vibes.

All in all, I have my health, my son and am employed - so life cannot possibily be that bad.  Well, until my next breakdown/crisis.  

I feel like this should be my law school application process mantra... They will not define my abilities nor will they define my potential.

Anyone willing to share their experience of the LSAT and the admissions process with me. Particularly looking for additional inspiration and advice regarding the personal statements that have been submitted.

Also, writing helps me to vent when I'm really in a bad place. it helps to let my feelings be expressed but not directly or inappropriately to the wrong persons. 

I have recently started a new job (when I say recently I mean within the last month). I love my new job, it's interesting and we are helping people. The people are amazing and very helpful. The only draw back is I I work 40 hours a week and I miss spending time wig my son. While I know he's in good hands and having fun. Additionally I am attending school on a full time basis. The work load wasn't so bad the last time I did this to myself, so why is it affecting me more now?! I can't help but think I'm getting old! 😂 I'm just kidding. But maybe I bit off more than I can chew or maybe I just took he right chance to make myself better. I guess I will have to wait and see.... Until next time... 🙈🙉🙊

This is not the way I envisioned my Sunday... Ugh. Homework gets in the way of entertainment haha