the devoted

“You can be sorry for hurting someone but not sorry for the action and I’m not sorry for the action because it showed me that I’m not happy here.” Kieran kept his eyes on Em. “I’m an asshole and I’m a cheater but you are oblivious to anything that has to do with me.” He wasn’t trying to shift blame here. Kieran was the first to admit that he was wrong. He could have gone about all of this a different way but he didn’t. “I may have cheated on you but I have done everything I possible could before that to make sure that you were okay. To make sure that you were comfortable. That you were happy. I forgot about me in all of that.” Kieran sighed, “Hate me if you want to, Em. I get it. I fucked up and you deserve way better than me.”

“And you think that what? That I didn’t do shit?” Kieran’s eyes narrowed, “I get I’m in the wrong here but don’t think for a second that I didn’t give this effort because I did. I can’t be what all of you want me to be.” He finally moved to stand up, “What do you want me to say to you? I’m sorry I hurt but I’m not sorry for anything that I did because I don’t regret it.”

Kieran stayed seated as he watched Em rise from her seat. “It really had nothing to do with you.” He didn’t mean to seem so cold or distant but he couldn’t help it. “I can’t be this guy, Em. I thought I could. I thought I could be the husband that went to work for August and name home and all that bullshit but that’s what it became bullshit.”

Kieran stayed quiet as he watched Em. He wasn’t expecting that question but maybe he should have expected it. He took in a deep breath. He could lie but what was the point? “Yeah.” His voice came out quiet as he looked at Em. “I was with Aspen before I came here.” It was harsh putting out there like that, Kieran knew that, but there was a part of him that couldn’t find it in himself to be gentle about it. “It was someone else before that. August never asked me to stay late.”

Emmeline remained completely silent, shaking her head slowly as she kept her gaze locked on the plate of food she wasted time preparing. “Why?” The word came out as a quiet hiss. The woman was practically shaking with a livid rage she never experienced before in her lifetime. “Was it not enough for you? Was I not enough? God,” Placing her palms along the table, she rose from her chair and almost knocked it backwards. “I was so fucking stupid actually believing this marriage wasn’t complete fucking bullshit.”

eli sighed softly and was caught off guard by the gentle touch the other offered, considering only a moment before they were threatening one another – but that was girls, really, wasn’t it? she smiled, cocking her head to the side, “I suppose I should give you my number then, if we’re now bffs.”

Em removed her hand, rolling her eyes although a small smile touched at the edge of her lips. “Go for it, just in case I take that offer from before.” She was plainly joking, yet, wasn’t sure Eli would know that. “You know, you’re not so bad if you ignore a thrill to kill other people.”

eli instantly felt a twinge of some sort of guilt, she couldn’t be completely emotionless, even when she wanted and she found herself regretting what she had done, if not for emmeline then at least for kieran – she did actually like him. she tilted her head to the side, lifting a brow, “I hope I’m not.”

“I hope you’re not either.” Em grew quiet for a moment before lifting a strong smile and reaching out to give Eli’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. “I know you tend to keep yourself to yourself, but you’re the closest I have to a friend that understands this world I’ve married into.”

The last thing he wanted was to return home after his moment with Aspen but he didn’t have much of a choice. He walked through the door and glanced towards the dining room when he heard Em’s voice. “Always am,” he replied with a slight grin before he walked into the dining room.

Emmeline debated playing it cool and then casually springing a few questions on him to prevent looking like one of those overly accusatory wives, even then she was thinking about Kieran despite the subject for the dinner. “Good. I wanted to do something a bit special since we haven’t had a home-cooked meal to ourselves recently.” She moved to cup the man’s face and pressed a kiss to his lips, palms lightly brushing down both sides of his neck as she turned to take her seat. “Sit down.”

eli-lily smirked and tilted her head to the side, “okay, sure,” her bad mood apparently knew no bounds considering she actually liked kieran, she only hoped she was correct and he didn’t feel the same towards his wife as she did to him, she actually didn’t want to cause a problem for him but there was no going back now. the woman shrugged her shoulders, “I’m not planting anything, I’m merely pointing out that if I had someone like you at home, someone who really cared for me and loved me, I wouldn’t be taking orders from some dick who would force me to break plans repeatedly.”

Emmeline needed to trust her husband, that’s apart of what marriage was all about, but now the seed was planted and no amount of wishing could remove the doubt from her mind. And when a woman like her suspected something, she would have the sheer will to pursue the matter regardless how long it took. Em glanced to her feet, releasing a small sigh to remain level-headed. “I understand how a caring nature can be spun as manipulation. Like you said, we girls have to stick together.” She locked her gaze with Eli’s, “I’ll talk to him and if you’re right, you are free to tell me I told you so.”

Kieran: Words no one ever wants to hear.

Emmeline: We'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

Kieran: We're good for dinner.

Emmeline: Good.

Emmeline: Hey, love.

eli lifted a perfectly contoured brow, her lips twitching as she pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth, “you wouldn’t – but are you sure he wouldn’t?” she questioned, tilting her head to the side, “let me guess, late nights, cancelling plans, the over use of pet names… but sure, I’m sure he’d never do that to you, because august doesn’t have relations of his own, people he’d rather be spending the nights with, he’s an asshole but – never made me stay later than necessary.” she brushed her fingers through her own hair and shrugged, “I just don’t like to see a woman alone, us girls have gotta stick together.”

Emmeline pressed her lips tightly together and refused to allow her emotions betray that nagging knot of suspicion tightening even further. “He wouldn’t.” The hesitation is enough to prove otherwise when she desired to wholeheartedly believe Kieran would remain faithful within their marriage. It made sense, the later nights, sitting at an empty dinner table with food already cooked only to discover he wouldn’t make it in time...was there truly someone else or was Eli using manipulation? “I appreciate the concern for girl power, but it’s not necessary. I’m only going on what you’re planting without any real proof. It’s just speculation.”

her eyebrows lifted and she didn’t bother to retort as the other woman, though visibly backing down, didn’t allow her confidence to be kicked. for a moment, eli understood why kieran was married to her, other than the good looks of course. she smirked, running her tongue over her teeth as the woman checked an incoming text that clearly had her disappointed. her lips formed a small pout, but humour danced visibly behind her eyes, “I almost thought we had a moment there,” she purred, tilting her head slightly, “let me know when those late nights start getting lonely, I can be pretty good company.”

Em typed a quick response, certain to make it sound reassuring rather than how she truly felt so Kieran wouldn’t worry, before stuffing the device back within her purse and shooting Eli a brief uncertain look. However tempting the offer was, she didn’t need anyone else warming her bed when she had that ring on her finger. “I wouldn’t do that to Kieran just as I know he wouldn’t do that to me.” If there was anything she needed to be confident about, it was her husband’s loyalty. “So kind for you to be considerate about my happiness, though, I never thought it possible.” There was just a hint of sarcasm to her words.

eli pursed her lips, looking the other over with a look that was picking emmeline apart where she stood. she couldn’t decide whether to be pissed or appreciate the balls this woman had, almost like the way eli-lily was in the beginning. she leaned forward, twirling her finger around a lock of the woman’s hair, “it’s not his business to be truthful about, I have a job that I love, a job that I worked hard for, I don’t appreciate the babble-mouth husband telling his wife the ins and outs of what august is doing.” she cocked her head to the side and let her eyes fall to the floor, “it’s not about protecting you, it’s about pissing people off and I’m fairly sure you wouldn’t want your husband pissing me off. I love your shoes.”

Emmeline always knew the exact moment where she was about to step in it and one wrong word may end being her last, but she couldn’t help growing on the defense. “Are you threatening me?” The woman narrowed her gaze partially, taking a step back and wrenching herself away from Eli’s touch. “I take great pride knowing my husband confides in me and I’m aware keeping my own mouth shut to anyone else is an essential. He only tells me so much.” She can’t know everything, really. “Maybe they’ll fit you perfectly if I stuck them up your-” Em’s comeback was cut off from the notification sound her phone made and she released a sigh, pulling it out and noticing the text from Kieran. Another late night. She couldn’t ignore the sinking disappointment. “I don’t want to start a fight with you, Eli. What Kieran and I do in our spare time is our business.”