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And he’s clinging to my hand like it’s a life preserver and I’m being me and talking about nonsense like Grimace from the McDonalds commercials and how R2D2 is always ready to throw hands, and whatever, and the artist keeps glancing over at me and I’m like do your tattoo bro I’ve got my buddy handled

But then I realize he’s like, looking over because he can’t tell if he’s seeing something or not, and I glance down and I see my rainbow scalemail bracelet, and how I’m talking to my buddy all fondly and I’m like stroking his arm like he’s a wounded animal, and right as it clicks in my head the tattoo artist asks in his most nonchalant voice possible, like intentionally bland, I’m just talking about the weather haha what do you mean voice:

“So, are you guys close?”

And my gay ass is over to the side internally screaming because yeah, I am gay, but like this is just me being a good bro and my buddy is COMPLETELY OBLVIOUS TO WHAT IS HAPPENING BECAUSE HE’S A GARBAGE STRAIGHT PERSON AND HE SAYS

“Yeah of course, that’s why I asked him to come”

SO NOW THE TATTOO ARTIST THINKS HE’S RIGHT AND HE HAS A GAY COUPLE GETTING A TATTOO AND MY BUDDY HAS NO IDEA AND I’M AWKWARDLY SITTING HERE LIKE SHOULD I STOP HOLDING HIS HAND??? SHOULD I CORRECT THIS TATTOO ARTIST??? SHOULD I LET MY BUDDY KNOW??? MY GAY ASS DOESN’T KNOW HOW TO HANDLE BEING INCORRECTLY ACCUSED OF BEING GAY, WHAT DO YOU DO

So that tattoo artist is like “Cool man, that’s great. Good for you.”

So then my buddy is like can I get some water, and the guy comes back with one bottle of water and my buddy takes a drink and then hands it to me, and I’m like obviously he has to lay down and needs me to hold his water so I just hold it in my hand, but turns out he was offering me water, so he turns to me and is like Colton, drink some water, and I take a drink and my garbage lizard brain is like “You’re drink sharing in front of the tattoo artist, now he KNOWS he’s right”

So we’re talking about tattoos with the artist and I mention that I’m getting a tattoo in September and my buddy is like “Yeah I’m gonna go and hold HIS hand for that one haha” and the tattoo artist FUCKING SAYS “I mean, I should hope so”

I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO

I MEAN, I SHOULD HOPE SO

And the safety briefing included the question “So if you’re pregnant, do you want to know or not?”

Turns out there had been a bit of an awkward situation once where the keepers had casually mentioned a woman’s pregnancy in a group, and she herself didn’t even know yet. Turns out the wolves are excellent at telling if you’re pregnant and the keepers can tell based on their body language.  They get all odd and careful around pregnancy. (Even wolves knows that you have to take care of pregnant people.)

So they definitely knew she was pregnant.

And if I remember my BBC documentaries right, a wolf will leave the pack to give birth and introduce the cubs to the pack once she feels ready for it. And maternity leave is flexible but often around 6 months so they’re going “YOU WERE GONE FOREVER! WE WERE SO WORRIED! WHERE ARE THE CUBS?? WE HAVE TO GREET THE CUBS!!“ 

Kurt Cobain: his parents didn’t want him to play with poor kids because he was “better than them” and he was forced to wear a sweater he was allergic to so his mom would brag how her kids “were the best dressed kids in town”

Kurt Cobain: thought he was the reason of his parents divorce since his parents usually argued about his up-bringing which made him feel guilty and embarassed 

Kurt Cobain: witnessed his mother being abused by her boyfriend who once broke her arm and felt guilty because he couldn’t do anything about it

Kurt Cobain: moved to live with his dad in a trailer trying to improve their relationship but his dad ended up marrying another woman after promising his 10 year old son not to remarry

Kurt Cobain: couldn’t get along with his step-mom because he felt that if he would love her he would betray his mom and because his father treated his step-siblings better than him which made him withdrawn and deprssed 

Kurt Cobain: he had minor scoliosis but both of his parents didn’t care which caused several physical problems in the future mainly his stomach problems

Kurt Cobain: was forced by his father to practice sports and left his father’s house when he was 14 after a huge argument because he lost a wrestling match 

Kurt Cobain: his mother didn’t want him to come live with her so he had to move from relative to relative. None of his relatives afforded his stay which made him feel depressed and un-wanted

Kurt Cobain: moved to live with his mom and her husband and he was constantly abused by his step-dad for being a virgin and single and often called him “loser” and “faggot”

Kurt Cobain: was bullied in high school for being friends with a gay boy and because he was intersted in arts while the other boys were interested in sports

Kurt Cobain: started smoking pot when he was 13 to deal with his depression and his mother didn’t bother to stop him because she was also smoking pot that she hid in her jewerly box and she even once took a drag from her son’s joint at a party

Kurt Cobain: got kicked out of his mom’s house at 17 because he brought a girl with him to impress his step-dad who would always brag about how many girls he slept with when he was in Kurt’s age

Kurt Cobain: was homeless when he was just 17 and he would sometimes sleep in the library, in the hospital waiting room or on cardboards and he NEVER complained to anyone about it

Kurt Cobain: had to quit school at 18 to find a job to afford his bread and rent a dirty and smelly shack and he went through several jobs including being a janitor at his own high school

Kurt Cobain: he was kicked out of his appartements several times because he couldn’t afford to pay the rent until moving in with his first girlfriend when he was 21

Kurt Cobain: suffered from severe stomach problems because he had  a pinched nerve in his spine caused by his untreated scoliosis and he didn’t talk about it because he didn’t want to bother people which later made him medicate himself using heroin in littles doses to kill the pain   

Kurt Cobain: would sometimes stop in the middle of the performance to check if the people who stage dived were ok

Kurt Cobain: heard the story of a 14 year old girl who got raped and wrote a song about her (Polly) 

Kurt Cobain: hated sexists, racists and homophobes and didn’t want them to come to his shows and always expressed his annoyance because of their presence

Kurt Cobain: respected women dearly and encouraged feminist movements (like Riot Grrrls) 

Kurt Cobain: tried to quit drugs and went to rehab twice in a row. Once when his wife was pregnant and a second time when his daughter was born

Kurt Cobain: accepted to play a benefit for rape survivors in Bosnia and Herzegovina and didn’t get a dime for his performance

Kurt Cobain: wrote a song about rape (Rape Me) because he wanted to attract media’s attention to that issue and kept playing it despite the critics and the controversy that surrounded the song

Kurt Cobain: played a gay rights benefit supporting No-on-Nine

Kurt Cobain: stopped in the middle of the song to defend a girl who was being harrassed and kicked the man out of the show after making him feel ashamed about himself

Kurt Cobain: used his fame to promote good bands who weren’t famous and was bothered by media’s focus on his band only and openly expressed how he thought bands like Soundgarden and Alice In Chains were better and deserve more recogniation

Kurt Cobain: didn’t want to be called “a voice of a generation” because his drug use was exposed and he didn’t want to inflence anybody negatively and he felt that he was judged by media which deepened his depresion because of his insecurity and made his drug addiction worse

Media: Kurt Cobain was a rock star junkie how hated fame and commited suicide because of it at age 27